


Where Futures Begin (Saeran x Reader x Saeyoung)

by sondepoch



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: 707 x reader - Freeform, Bromance, Completed, F/M, Love Triangles, Multi, No Incest, Pain, Romance, saeran x reader, saeran x reader x saeyoung, saeyoung x reader - Freeform, saeyoung x reader x saeran
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-31
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:27:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 62,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22054042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sondepoch/pseuds/sondepoch
Summary: Life used to be simple for you. Simple, and peaceful.But the Savior had other plans for you, and without a second thought, she ruined what you thought was your one shot at happiness. Blinded by anger, you escaped the Mint Eye, but that triggered a series of events that would bring you further into the world of brothers Saeran and Saeyoung.And further into the twisted world of your love for them.
Relationships: 707 | Choi Luciel/Reader, Choi Saeran/Reader
Comments: 45
Kudos: 250





	1. I: Neutral Route (Y/N)

Home is a funny concept.

It's one of those words with a definition that changes every time something happens in life. Sixteen years ago, you were nothing more than an innocent baby drinking milk from your mother's breast. It didn't matter that she and your father wound up being abusive fucks, that they screwed your life over and permanently scarred both your mind and body.

That tiny apartment was home sweet home.

Six years later, way afterwards when your parents had died and left you alone in the world, you found yourself calling your orphanage home, even if you never made any friends. Because at that time, what else did you have?

A few years ago, the orphanage kicked you out. They said that since you were sixteen, they no longer had any legal obligation to feed and shelter you. You spent a week hungry on the streets before you learned to steal and fight. Over time, you had found a new home among the homeless peoples of downtown Seoul.

You thought that would be your final home. That you would either die of pneumonia on the streets or that someone would stab you in your sleep under the open night sky, and that you'd live a short life. But when _he_ waltzed into your life, he brought you to what he said would be your _true_ final home.

 _He_ changed everything.

"Saeran," You whispered out softly, saying the name of the man who had the spotlight on the stage your thoughts.

As if he had been waiting for that precise moment, you heard him knock at your door. It was more of a courtesy than an actual request for entry; at the Mint Eye, he was still ranked above you, but the boy always treated you with respect, as he had even when he first discovered you on the streets.

"You can come in, Saeran," You called out, and he poked his head through the doorway.

"How did you know it was me?"

"Only you knock, silly," You responded with a smile, patting the empty space next to you on your bed, "Come sit down. I was just thinking about you, actually."

Saeran closed the door behind him and sat down on your bed, his expression blank, "Thinking about me?"

You nodded your head. "Yeah, about the day we met."

For the first time today, you see his face break out in a soft smile as he recalls the memory with you.

_You weren't used to the cold._

_Miserable as your life was in the orphanage, they had provided blankets for everyone, and the heating was broken in certain rooms, but it was mostly functional. In mid-February on an open street, though..._

_You burrowed your arms further in your pockets and curled up into a ball with your back pressed against a wall, desperately trying to retain some of your natural body heat._

_"Hey."_

_You didn't glance up. Being homeless was more uneventful than you had initially thought, and even though it had only been a week, you'd long lost interest in what you thought were the conversations of other people._

_"Hey, I'm talking to you. (H/ c) hair, yeah, you."_

_You shot a wary glance up at the figure that was now standing directly in front of you. It was a man with white hair, staring down at you with an unreadable expression. He looked about your age._

_"Y-yes? How can I help you?" You cringed internally at your stutter. Whatever this guy wanted, it couldn't be good, right? Should you run away? Should you scream for help? But who would help a hobo? Maybe it was best if-_

_"You've been through a lot of pain in your life, haven't you?"_

_That question broke you from your thoughts. For once, you had no idea what to say._

_The answer was yes, it was so obviously yes. You had been beaten and cursed at and hurt, deep scars left on you that would never fully fade away. Pain was no stranger to you. Hell, you knew pain better than you knew yourself._

_But you didn't want to admit that to a stranger._

_"You don't have to say anything. I can see it in your eyes."_

_Instinctively, you pulled your gaze away from the man's calculating eyes, too proud to let him see further into your soul. He chuckled in response and bent down to your level, where you tried to break the laws of physics and further wrap your jacket around yourself._

_"How about this," He said after thinking for a moment, "I'll give you my jacket if you talk to me, just for a little bit."_

_The offer was too tempting to resist. Within minutes, you were wrapped in his fur coat and had told him your life story, about your abusive parents, their deaths, the orphanage, you had even told him about your wistful dream for a normal life._

_"(Y/N), was it? I can't help you become normal...because you're not. You're special, like me. You're...chosen." You glanced up at the man, whose name you had learned to be 'Ray.'_

_Ray looked at your confused gaze and continued, "You've been chosen for paradise, (Y/N). If you come with me...I can bring you to Mint Eye. To our Magenta...where everyone is happy."_

"Joining the Mint Eye was the best decision I've ever made," you cooed, shifting your position so that you were lying down on the bed on Saeran's lap. The position was familiar for the two of you, and probably the most comfortable.

"It still took a lot of convincing to get you to join," Saeran pouted, running a hand through your hair, "I had to go back twice to get you to come here."

You rolled your eyes, another soft giggle escaping your lips, "Oh shush. You were difficult to deal with, too, back then. Remember? You told me your name was Ray."

"My name _is_ Ray," Saeran said with a stubborn pout, giving your cheek a flick.

"Yeah, yeah, everyone at the Mint Eye calls you Ray, but you're _really_ Saeran, aren't you?" You pulled yourself into an upright position and kissed Saeran on the cheek, "You're _my_ Saeran."

The white-haired male didn't respond, a pink blush painting his features as soon as your lips contacted his skin. "Where are you going?" He whined as you began to get out of bed. "Come on, _princess_ , don't go~" He murmured, using your hesitation at his favorite nickname to wrap his arms around your waist.

"I have to, Saeran. The Savior asked that I meet with her. I need to be ready for when she calls me down." You opened your drawer and rummaged through it for a clean disciples' robe, "You should get ready too. There's a Recruitment Ceremony tonight. Now turn around."

Saeran turned around with a pout, facing the wall as you continued to talk about the ceremony today, and how Savior had promised a surprise for you. A couple times, the boy tried to turn around and peek at your changing form, but you always flicked his head back in the other direction before he could see anything.

You laughed to yourself as he was forced to face the wall once more, complaining about how you were taking too long to change.

Honestly, your relationship with Saeran was one that no one in the Mint Eye really understood. You loved him, you knew that the day he brought you to the Mint Eye, when he stayed with you and held your hand as you took the Elixir of Salvation for the first time after your recruitment ceremony.

And if asked, he wouldn't waste a beat in saying that he loved you back. Every day, he'd cuddle with you and spin you around and hug you and shower you with kisses, but it had never gone further than that. A kiss on the cheek, a kiss on the forehead, but you two had never once kissed each other on the lips.

Sometimes you wished he would, just to prove that your relationship was anything more than platonic, but you kept yourself in check. He was your world, and the affection he already showered you with was more than enough to keep you happy.

That was the purpose of the Mint Eye, right? To share magenta and spread happiness?

"Alright, I'm done. You can turn around now." You smoothed out your robe, making sure it wasn't bunching up anywhere as Saeran picked up a comb and began working with your mess of a hair. Well, you called it a mess. He called it art.

"Saeran, did you just smell my hair?"

"..."

You rolled your eyes and turned to face yourself in the mirror as he brushed through the knots and began a fancy half-up-half-down braid in your hair. You watched his deft fingers, mesmerized. Hair was something he had always refused to teach you because he insisted that he would always be there for you to do it himself, so you tried to learn by watching him - but you could never fully replicate anything Saeran did.

"Hey, _princess_ ," Saeran smirked, using his favorite petname for you once more, "When do you think you'll let me dye your hair?"

"Saeran, for the last time, I highly doubt that the Savior would approve of me walking into a Recruitment Ceremony with rainbow highlights."

"No, not that," Saeran laughed lightly, a lovely sound that made your heart beat faster, "Just the bottom. Neutral tones only. I think you'd look nice with an ombre."

You hesitated, not sure whether to accept or deny his request.

"Just think about it, okay?"

Saeran secured your hair with a bobby pin and took a step back, admiring his work. "Almost done, princess. Wait here," he said with childlike excitement, darting out of the room before you could process his words.

You didn't mind, though, because it wasn't long before Saeran had returned with an armful of tiny flowers. You gasped in delight at the sight of them, each one tiny yet vibrantly rich, all a dark purple that paired beautifully with the violet disciples' robe you were wearing.

"Hold still, princess," Saeran murmured as he secured a tiny flower at each crossing of your braided hair, dotting your hair violet, like paint to a canvas.

"And _now,_ I'm finished." Saeran smiled as he admired his work, and you did a little twirl for him, smiling bashfully when you noticed your reflection in the mirror. With the violet robe you had adorned and the purple flowers that surrounded your head like a crown, you looked like a perfect personification of _magenta_.

"Why so fancy today?" You inquired.

Saeran only gave you a sly smirk. "You'll find out. The Savior did call you down, didn't she? She'll tell you then."

"Hey! No fair! You can't keep secrets from me!" You pouted and crossed your arms, but Saeran only shrugged his shoulders, refusing to give you a straight answer. Figuring this conversation would lead nowhere, you were quick to move on, "What are they called? These flowers?" You asked innocently, twirling a particularly long strand of hair between your fingers.

"Aubrieta deltoidea. Flowers from a lilac bush. They're small, but they grow in large quantities, so instead of putting one big flower at the back or side of your head, I was able to put nearly a dozen small ones. You look quite b-beautiful, actually..." Saeran's voice trailed off at the end, a familiar pink creeping onto his cheeks as he glanced away from your figure.

"The Savior will love it." You said with a smile, taking a step toward Saeran and embracing him.

He was quick to hug you back, running a hand through the bottom half of your hair where he had let your soft locks hang loose. As you two pulled apart, you made eye contact, and for a brief moment, you were acutely aware of how his arms were gripping your waist and how close his lips were.

The moment was perfect.

You were dressed in a form-fitting robe that clung to your body like a dress, your hair done up in a way that made you look like a true princess; Saeran, in turn, was dressed in his suit, his hair still sticking up in certain parts from when you had messed with it earlier, but only contributing to his ruggedly handsome looks.

Your eyes dropped from his hair to his eyes to his lips, his perfect lips, and they were getting closer and closer until...

_"Disciple (L/N), please report to the Savior's quarters. This is the first notice for Disciple (L/N). Please report to the Savior's quarters."_

The monotonous voice broke you and Saeran from your trance, and you both stepped backwards, the moment ruined before any contact could be made.

"I-I have to...uh..." You stammered out, your mind still fried from the electricity in the air not five seconds ago.

"Y-yeah, of course, m-me too," Saeran responded, his face completely red as he practically sprinted out of the room, leaving you to answer the Savior's summon for your presence.

When your door had slammed shut, you took a final glance at yourself in the mirror. Your cheeks were still a little rosy, but it was nothing that wouldn't die down by the time you made your way up to the third floor of the Mint Eye.

You were ready to see the Savior.

***

"Tea?" You stared at the Savior with a puzzled expression.

You were nothing more than a disciple. Higher ranked than a mere believer, yes, but not ranked high enough to be worthy of a personal audience with the Savior, much less _tea_ made by her own hand.

"A-ah, your offer is too kind, my Savior. I have done nothing to deserve such a blessing."

"Perhaps you would like another taste of the Elixir, then?" The sharpness in the Savior's voice made you flinch. "Tea, or the Elixir of Salvation, my dear disciple (Y/N)?

That was no question at all - the Elixir of Salvation was accompanied by excruciating pain, a blessing from the Savior but far less preferable than tea. "Between the two, I should prefer the tea, my Savior."

The Savior gave you a sweet smile that melted away your fear at being summoned. It was such an amiable grin, it was the smile of someone who contributed to the spread of happiness in the world. Your happiness, specifically.

"Thank you," You said, bowing your head as the Savior placed a cup of tea in front of you. She then sat across from you on a matching leather sofa.

For the longest time, she only sat there, her teacup resting on the table as she studied you. Her gaze was penetrating, you felt utterly naked beneath her green irises as if they were stripping each layer of your soul away to observe the trembling core that held you together.

"Disciple (Y/N), do you like dresses?"

The question caught you off guard.

You were expecting her to ask about your past, about your family, about your reasons for joining the Mint Eye. But this?

"I haven't worn a dress in a very long time, my Savior. From what I recall, though, I do think I liked them on the occasions where I was permitted to wear one."

The Savior didn't waste a moment in responding. "Brilliant. You will no longer need to wear those Disciples' robes. Your wardrobe is to be replaced with dresses...I expect you to be wearing one at today's Recruitment Ceremony."

You felt your eyebrows furrow in confusion. You were no longer to wear Disciples' robes? Were you being demoted to a believer rank? But believers had their own uniform...

"(Y/N), look at me," The Savior commanded, her voice holding authority despite it being gentle, "I'm inducting you into my Council. You're to report to me directly, now, so we'll be meeting at this same time every day for half an hour unless otherwise specified. If you have any questions, I trust you will ask Ray. He's to supervise your work...Is this truly news to you? Were you not already aware of this decision?"

You stared at your cup of tea, your reflection shaky as you settled the cup down on the coffee table, "No, my Savior. This is the first I'm hearing of this information."

The Savior smiled and laughed to herself, "I'm impressed. I had instructed Ray not to tell you, but I wasn't sure he'd be able to keep a secret for so long. Regardless," she pushed a brown package toward you, and you were able to see a bright violet cloth peek out from inside, "Change into this for the ceremony. You will be at my right side the entire time."

You nodded your head, taking the package into your hands while the Savior continued, "Work will begin in one month for you. By that point, your wardrobe will be exchanged to suit your higher rank, and you'll have a room in the renovated quarters. Ray has asked for his room to be across from yours, do you second that request?"

You nodded your head, smiling lightly at how thoughtful Saeran managed to be without even trying.

"Well, if you both think that your relationship will last after this..." The Savior murmured, more to herself rather than you, but the words piqued your interest.

"Is there anything that should ruin our relationship, my Savior?" You asked, the bold words coming across as ruder than they had sounded in your head.

If she noticed, the Savior didn't acknowledge the impudent tone in your words, twirling a blond curl as she took her time to respond. "Perhaps. We shall see. Report for secondary commitment tomorrow, and..."

You pulled your gaze up from the package to the Savior's own eyes as she smiled. She placed a delicate hand on top of yours, "Welcome, (Y/N). I look forward to walking this new future with you in our paradise. Where everyone is happy."

You smiled, not wasting a moment to complete the phrase, "In the magenta of dreams and hope."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 3.0k
> 
> Notes: And that's the first chapter of my new series! I have a good amount of chapters prewritten so I promise that chapters will be updated regularly ;) My hard goal is to have 1 chapter out every Monday, but I'm going to push myself to try to update on Thursdays too so that you guys don't have to wait as long! :)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/02/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	2. II: Neutral Route (Saeran)

Mendelssohn's violin concerto in E minor, easily among the most beautiful violin concertos of all time, lasts nearly thirty minutes. Yet this is the fourth time it's restarted today, and Saeran and (Y/N) still haven't stopped dancing.

Their feet move slowly, waltzing at half the tempo of the piece, less focused on dancing and more occupied with basking in each others' warmth, staying as close together as possible.

The Recruitment Ceremony concluded a little over two hours ago, and all the new believers were celebrating their faith and loyalty to the Savior by indulging in their first taste of happiness at the Mint Eye, at this feast.

For Saeran, though, food was the last thing on his mind.

The dress the Savior gave (Y/N) fit perfectly, hugging her curves in a way that Saeran thought made her too gorgeous to risk leaving for the whole ballroom to see. He had never glared at anyone the way he stared daggers at the new believers that were ogling (Y/N)'s body shamelessly.

Saeran made a mental note to ask the Savior to give (Y/N) more modest dresses. He slipped an arm around her waist and tried to subtly pull the dress down, quickly bringing his hand back to its original position afterward. Her amused giggle made him realize that she _had_ indeed noticed.

"Oh, Saeran~" (Y/N) cooed, dragging his name out in the same way that always tangled his thoughts, "Do you not like this dress?"

"O-of course not. I mean. Of course. Wait..." Saeran stuttered, taking a moment to gather his thoughts before continuing, "It's a nice dress. Especially on you. B-but it's really short... have you noticed how the new believers are staring at you?"

Saeran heard (Y/N) laugh again, and he wanted to bury his face in her hair and hide the blush that he knew was spreading across his face. Her hair...her beautiful, beautiful hair... _Why did I have to style it like this today? I should have done something simpler, something that would draw less attention, I could have avoided this!_

"Saeran, the dress is barely above my knees. And you have nothing to worry about." (Y/N) brought her hand from his shoulder to his cheek and stared at him with those familiar, trusting eyes. "None of them would dare lay a hand on me after _this_."

"This?" Saeran cocked his head, puzzled.

"Saeran, we've danced for nearly two hours, and if looks could kill, every man in this room who even glanced my way would be dead. You've made it very clear that I'm off-limits." (Y/N) kissed Saeran's cheek, and he could hear the smirk in her voice.

"I-I didn't mean to..." Saeran murmured half-heartedly, even though he knew exactly what he was doing when he first dragged (Y/N) onto the ballroom dancing floor. And he may or may not have given the middle finger to a particular believer who had been staring at her rear.

"Sure," (Y/N) said with a chuckle, before abruptly stopping and clasping Saeran's two hands in her own. "Anyway, let's get food. I haven't eaten since breakfast, I'm starving."

"Alright, princess, you pick a table, and I'll bring enough food for both of us."

"I can get my own food, Saeran!" (Y/N) whined as Saeran guided her off the wooden floor and toward the buffet, but Saeran was bent on being a gentleman. The way the men were staring at her figure, he'd much rather have her bottom in a chair than up and about.

"Technically speaking, I'm your boss now. You're no longer a disciple, so you'll be helping me out with perimeter management and software protection in the Security Room. That means you have to do what I say, princess, so go get us a table."

Without giving (Y/N) any room to protest, Saeran made a beeline for the buffet. He filled two plates with all his beloved sweets and all (Y/N)'s favorite dishes. Only when he actually got to the table (Y/N) had selected did Saeran realize that he had only gotten dessert items.

(Y/N) didn't seem to notice, though, immediately indulging in the array of treats Saeran had brought back.

The two ate in silence, enjoying the now familiar melody of the music that was being played in the background. Saeran found himself unable to draw his eyes away from (Y/N) as she ate; everything about her looked perfect. Even her hair, which Saeran always thought looked a little off when he tried a sophisticated hairstyle like this one, had held its shape throughout the night. And _god,_ the dress was still driving him crazy. Had the Savior consciously chosen something that would make him feel this way? The woman _had_ been asking an awful lot of questions about (Y/N) at Saeran's previous meeting with her. Still, Saeran thought that was because they were discussing (Y/N) joining the Savior's council.

Saeran groaned inwardly and forced himself to stop staring at (Y/N)'s bare shoulders and tried to focus on the dessert he was eating, but he quite suddenly found that he had an appetite for a different kind of dessert.

_Shit, stop it,_ Saeran told himself _, It's bad enough that you almost kissed her earlier in her room. Now this? You need to control yourself._

"So," (Y/N)'s voice broke Saeran from his thoughts. "The Savior said that I'd have to go through secondary commitment. W...What do you have to do for the secondary commitment?"

Saeran swallowed, keenly aware of what (Y/N) was really asking.

There were two commitments one could make to the magenta: primary and secondary. Primary commitment was the first step believers took in joining the Mint Eye. It was their first test to see if they were truly committed to building and sharing _the magenta_.

It was quite a simple process, actually.

Drink the Elixir of Salvation.

The pain that accompanied the Elixir alone would typically be enough to distinguish true believers from fakers; in (Y/N)'s case, though, her primary commitment had been extended, and the dosage doubled, the Savior particularly hesitant about accepting her into the Mint Eye.

Saeran had never told (Y/N) that her commitment was any different than the usual, though. He didn't want her to begin harboring any kind of distaste for the Savior that would warrant further Elixirs. After all, Saeran had been by (Y/N)'s side the whole time, dabbing away at her sweat as she slept, helping her drink water in her delirium, holding her hand and never letting go as she sobbed in pain. He never left her side last time, and he'd be there for her this time too.

"Secondary commitment is worse," Saeran said bluntly. He didn't want to continue, he didn't want to talk about it, but the fearful look in (Y/N)'s eyes forced his mouth. "It's a repeat of primary commitment with some...extra things added."

Saeran saw (Y/N) shudder and bite her lip, a habit that only came to light when (Y/N) was scared. "What extra things, Saeran?" Her voice was gentle, despite the fear she must have been harboring at that moment.

"Well...extra time, for one. Secondary commitment takes a-a month." Saeran brought his hand over the table and placed it on top of (Y/N)'s, trying to comfort her in the terror he knew she was facing as she mentally braced herself for the hell that she was to embrace the next day.

Saeran knew what she was going through. When he found out about secondary commitment, he was so scared he actually tried to go back to being a disciple, even though it was out of his hands at that point.

He continued, "You'll be assigned a handler. You can't back out of secondary commitment, so your handler will force the Elixir down your throat if necessary...you'll most likely never be able to forgive your handler for the pain they give you."

"Go on." (Y/N) said after taking a shaky breath.

"Your eyes...you're to be one with the Mint Eye. You'll adorn the namesake, and your eyes will be bleached to this color," Saeran pointed to his own eyes, trying not to recall the pain that accompanied that particular feat. (Y/N)'s eyes grew even rounder in fear as she stared at the unnatural color Saeran's eyes were. No doubt, she had previously thought they were contact lenses.

"Your hair...it isn't magenta, so your handler will bleach your hair and then deprive your body of nutrients for the month. Your body won't be able to keep your hair at its color, it'll be too deprived of the vitamins it needs, so your hair will become a lot thinner, and it'll lose color. It'll feel like the worst migraine you've ever had, but it's not too bad when compared to the other things..."

Saeran didn't want to say more. He understood that (Y/N) needed to know what she was about to go through, but reciting the details of secondary commitment was bringing back some horrid memories for the boy.

"Saeran, please." (Y/N) squeezed Saeran's hand and looked at him with earnest eyes. _I'm so weak_ , Saeran thought to himself _, I should be the one comforting (Y/N) right now, but she's the one holding my hand._ "I can't walk into the commitment room tomorrow and not know what I'm in for. I almost didn't make it through primary commitment for that very reason."

Saeran dropped his eyes and stared at the untouched flan on his plate. "That's mostly it. You'll be branded with the sigil of the Mint Eye, either burnt or given a tattoo like the one I have. But...(Y/N), there's one thing I haven't told you."

Saeran swallowed nervously, unable to meet the eyes of the precious girl he cared so much for. This time, (Y/N) didn't ask him to continue, but the slight squeeze of his hand gave Saeran enough boldness to tell her the truth.

"I'm to be your handler for secondary commitment," Saeran whispered, "Savior's orders."

Saeran felt warmth leave his hand and looked up to see (Y/N)'s entire form withdrawn in fear. Saeran extended an arm to caress her cheek, but she recoiled at the first contact. "I-I'm sorry," she murmured, standing up, "I-I need some time alone t-to..."

(Y/N) trailed off and forced herself out of the seat, making way for the large double doors at the end of the room.

Saeran didn't let her get that far, though. "(Y/N), wait," He told her, grabbing her wrist and pulling her smaller body into his, him practically spooning her as they stood, "Please." Saeran whispered, and that one word communicated all that needed to be said.

(Y/N) turned around and faced him, and for the first time since her primary commitment, Saeran saw tears in her eyes. "I'm scared, Saeran," (Y/N) whispered, "I don't want to hate you. I don't want to do my secondary commitment. I don't want to be a part of the Savior's council."

Saeran wrapped his arms around (Y/N) and let her tears flow into his shoulder, her tearful face protected from the stares of all the believers in the Mint Eye. "I know, princess." Saeran mumbled, stroking her hair, "I know."

Saeran was about to enter the worst month of his life, he knew. It would be worse than his own secondary commitment. Because this time, he wouldn't be on the receiving end of the pain.

He would be the cause of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.9k
> 
> Notes: Happy new year! Well, it's happy for some people. I'm a bit bummed right now -_- school starts back up in eight hours for me but honestly who even cares about school and sleep when you have Ao3. Btw: this story will shift from the pov of (Y/N) to Saeran to Saeyoung and even Rika, so make sure you check the chapter title so you know who the chapter will focus on! 
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/06/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	3. III: Neutral Route (Y/N)

**Day 1**

The walls of the room were white, weren't they? You stumbled forward, walking straight into a wall that was apparently closer than you had thought. Landing ungraciously on the ground, you brought a shaky hand to the wall to touch it, and the wall seemed to curve inward as your finger neared the white paint that now appeared to be spotted with black.

"(Y-Y/N)!" You heard a voice call from behind you. "Are you okay?"

You were guided off the floor and back toward the mattress on the ground by a pair of mystery hands. You recognized the voice vaguely, but your mind was too much of a jumble for you to form any coherent thoughts.

"Are _you_ okay?" You replied, giggling as you repeated the question the voice just asked you. Your giggle quickly turned into a full laugh, something about the situation incredibly funny to you. Within seconds, though, your laughter had morphed into a wail as you felt your thoughts clear for a brief moment, followed by excruciating pain.

You clutched your head, then your stomach, then your leg, unsure of where the pain was coming and reached the realization, for perhaps the tenth time in the hour, that the pain had enveloped your body whole, making _everything_ feel like literal hell.

You felt tears roll down your cheeks, and that only made you cry harder, the usually delicate drops of water now seeming to dig trenches of torment into your skin, into your head, into _you_.

**Day 4**

"I can't, Saeran, I can't do it anymore." You pushed Saeran away from you and retreated further into the corner of the room.

This was the clearest your mind had been in the past month you'd been here. _I_ ** _have_** _been here a month, right?_ You thought and then nodded your head to yourself. Of course you'd been in the commitment room a month. Your brain may have been a fog at that moment, but it felt like an eternity had passed between that precise moment and when you were fed your first Elixir in the commitment room.

"(Y/N), please, you've been so good, just take a sip, and it'll all be over," Saeran tried pleading with you. "Please, don't make me force you."

You shrieked, looking around for something to throw at the white-haired male, something that would scare him off. You weren't drinking any more of the elixir. The pain wasn't worth it. "I'm not going to do it!"

Saeran ran a hand through his disheveled hair, and you couldn't tell what was going through his mind.

He turned around, and you sighed in relief when you noted his form moving toward the door. He was moving toward the door, right? You couldn't be sure anymore. The Elixir was messing with your mind.

Wait, no.

He wasn't moving toward the door.

He was moving toward _you_.

"(Y/N), please," he whispered, now standing directly in front of you (or so you thought, who could be sure?).

You pressed your back into the corner, ignoring the shot of pain that exploded as you applied pressure to agitated skin, and forced your mouth shut. Saeran pushed the glass containing the Elixir to your lips, trying to shove the liquid through the closed opening, but you were stubborn.

Seeming to give up, Saeran sat down next to the bed on you, moving quickly enough that your head spun for a moment, your brain temporarily lagging behind reality. "You know I love you, right, (Y/N)?" He murmured, and you smiled.

You did know that much, at the very least. 

You still didn't open your lips, but nodded your head. "Please forgive me," Saeran whispered, his face getting closer and closer, until you two were kissing.

For the first time since you entered the Commitment Room, external touch didn't bring a wave of pain. Instead, Saeran's lips seemed to be cleansing your body of the Elixir, like he was the antidote your body had been craving this whole time.

Saeran pulled back for a moment, but you didn't open your eyes, wanting to savor the moment, and then his lips were on yours again. You leaned into the kiss, not embracing him with your arms but with your lips, and when he slid his tongue along your lip, you readily opened your mouth for him.

Then, betrayal.

Saeran released a mouthful of liquid into your mouth and leaned back, holding your mouth shut with his hand. You tried to spit it out, the bitterness all too familiar on your tongue, but Saeran's hand was unyielding.

"Swallow, (Y/N)," Saeran said, his voice devoid of emotion as you stared at him with eyes filled with anger, hate, and resentment.

With no other choice, you swallowed the elixir, and then it was like the liquid had become a sea of pain that you were drowning in. Saeran and his unforgivable acts were forgotten, and all that was left in your world was pain.

**Day 12**

You weren't sure when was the last time you had spoken. Or moved. Or did anything other than swallow the Elixir and lie on your mattress in pain.

You no longer had the mental capacity to think. Your mind was blank, the only verification of your presence in the world being the _tic-tock_ of some clock outside your room. Earlier, what felt like a year ago, you had tried counting the _tic's_ , but the opening of a door had broken you from your thoughts.

A door would open.

Someone would walk in.

"Swallow," A voice would say.

Pain.

Then, repeat.

You were pretty sure you had heard the voice apologize a couple times, but in your delirium, you couldn't be sure of anything anymore. 

You strained your ears, hearing the familiar sound of a door opening.

 _Is it time already?_ You wondered, no longer hesitating to swallow the bitter liquid that trickled into your mouth.

You opened an eye for the first time in days, and a familiar face gazed at you with concern. _So familiar. Who..._ You tried to recall the handsome man who stood before you, but the Elixir drowned your thoughts in pain, and before you ever authorized the closing of your eyes, they were scrunched shut, and everything was forgotten once more.

**Day 21**

_"This is the last one, (Y/N)."_

Those words repeated in your mind like a mantra, the weight of them bringing you to sit upright. Your head ached, but it wasn't the same harrowing sting that you had grown used to. It was more like the aftertaste of the pain, nauseating and unpleasant, but quite manageable.

 _The last one...am I done? Have I lasted a month? Has my secondary commitment ended?_ Thoughts raced through your mind like a swarm of insects, quick to come and quicker to go.

You forced yourself to stand on the mattress, and a subconscious grin spread across your face. It was over. It had to be.

The door opened, and for the first time since your arrival in this room, your vision was clear. No curved walls, no black spots on the white paint, no random dips in the flat floor. It looked normal. It was normal.

"Saeran!" You cried out, practically leaping into the male's arms. "Is it over? Am I committed?"

Your grin was contagious, bringing a soft smile to Saeran's usually stoic face as he saw you greet him for the first time too long. "(Y/N), my princess," He whispered, burying his face in your hair, holding you impossibly tight, "I've missed you so much."

You only smiled in return.

"But..."

You felt a frown tug at your lips. "But what?" You said, your voice flat, the question not really a question but more of a command.

"You're not done."

Saeran felt your spirits drop from cloud nine all the way down to the cold hard earth, and he was quick to try to salvage the situation, "But you won't need any more Elixirs! The worst of the pain is over, (Y/N), really."

You looked up at Saeran and let out a mirthless chuckle. You weren't sure how much more of this you could handle.

Your mouth set itself into a thin line, neither smiling nor frowning, and Saeran continued, "You have five days of rest. As the elixir leaves your system, the Savior will visit you...but you probably won't recall her visit. At least, I don't remember her visits with me from my secondary commitment. Soon, we'll bleach your hair and tattoo you. And then..."

"The eyes?" You asked bluntly, already aware that the final step in your commitment would likely be as painful as the elixirs.

Saeran nodded.

For a while, the two of you just stood there, unmoving and unspeaking, but after enough time had passed, Saeran sat next to you on the bed.

"Lie down, princess," he said, patting his lap, and for the first time, you didn't think of the impending pain you'd be faced with in the next few days. You simply allowed yourself to forget everything else in the world once more until all that was left was you and Saeran, and the braid he was pulling your hair into.

**Day 30**

Nearly thirty full days, you laid on your mattress and shut your eyes. At least, that's what Saeran said.

But, oh, what a blessing that was.

It didn't matter that at the time that your stomach was pumped full of the Elixir, that your saliva tasted bitter, and you couldn't move without pain shooting through your body like rockets.

You could still close your eyes.

The ability to blink is greatly underappreciated. Something you resigned yourself to never forget as Saeran tightened the eye brace that was keeping your eyelids from blinking down. There were about ten seconds of nonchalance before the pain set in, and it was one of the worst pains you've ever felt.

Back when you were just taking the Elixir, your mind was numbed as your body succumbed to the torture. You weren't aware of what was happening, and you sure as hell didn't remember a thing from any of it.

Now though? All you could think about were your corneas, astutely aware of the appalling level of pain your eyes would be subject to for the next twenty hours.

"Just bear with it, (Y/N), this is going to be over so soon," Saeran said, holding your hand tightly. Your entire body was strapped to a chair, all your limbs tied down so that you wouldn't be able to remove the brace, "I'm sorry," He said for the thousandth time, "I'm so sorry."

You couldn't bring yourself to acknowledge Saeran, though. You could barely think.

It was like someone had taken a picture of a person right before they died, in that moment where the body is fighting desperately for its life and every single sense is on fire, the brain haphazardly sending a million waves of pain and ache and agony to the location in question in hopes that _something_ will save it, and had frozen you in time so that you were feeling like that every goddamn second.

"H..." You started, trying to focus on your words to lessen the effect of the pain.

"Help me, Saeran."

The boy's eyes filled with sympathy at your words, desperately wanting to do something to alleviate your pain but not knowing _what_. "The pain will ease out when the color gets injected, it's just a few more hours, and I'll be here the whole time, (Y/N), I promi-"

"No," You interrupted him, unable to bear it any longer. "No."

Saeran opened his mouth and closed it, at a loss for words.

"Knock me out, Saeran," You whispered, keeping your voice low as if the Savior were listening at the door. "The eye brace will keep my eyes open, and I won't have to deal with the pain. _Please."_

Saeran hesitated, unsure. "(Y/N), if the Savior finds out, we'll both..."

"Do it, Saeran!" You shouted, the pain unbearable as tears rolled down your cheeks, "Please!"

Your vision turned blurry, and you couldn't see straight anymore, your eyes crying out in pain and the unfairness of it all. This wasn't just. It wasn't right. And it was so close to being over. You looked upward and murmured a prayer the orphanage had taught you, desperately asking to be saved from the world of pain you were in; for Saeran to knock you out and give you a break from misery.

Then, redemption.

You felt Saeran strike your head, allowing darkness had set in despite your eyes staying open, the pain distant once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.1k
> 
> Notes: Welp that's another chapter. Lmao sorry for posting it so late, I had this done a while back but I wound up being busy so I pulled my first all-nighter of 2020 working on all the history homework I'd procrastinated on. EW HISTORY. I'm team physics ;) Ngl I'm still in school and I have an actually amazing history teacher but he makes us work so hard and it's ROUGH but probably because whenever I should be doing homework I'm messing around on ao3 so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 01/09/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	4. IV: Neutral Route (Y/N)

The first one to hug you wasn't Saeran, as you had thought it would be.

No, as soon as you stepped outside the Commitment Room, the Savior had embraced you, drinking in the beautiful sight of _you_. Her smile was dazzling as she stared at your changed hair and irises, and not a single word was exchanged as she pulled you to her personal chambers.

Your head was still in a slight daze, your mind a second late in processing everything, still healing from the pain. The Savior must have known, though, because she didn't do anything that would further tangle your thoughts. 

Instead of bombarding you with questions like you had expected, she had simply told you what to do.

It was strangely comforting, being given simple commands that you were able to carry out without fear of messing up. The Savior was thoughtful like that. There was no room for error in her words, they were so simple. 

_Shower with soap and shampoo. Change into these undergarments. Dry your body and hair. Come out and wear this._

"Oh, silly (Y/N), do you need help with that?" The Savior asked from across the room as she observed you struggling to pull yourself into the dress she had laid out for you. For some reason, the velvet fabric wasn't gliding over your skin as smoothly as you thought it would. "Here, (Y/N), you forgot to tie the waist down first. There we go."

The Savior smiled as she continued to dress you, ordering you to stand still while she applied makeup to your face for the first time, giving you a dab of lipstick and subtle eyeliner. "It seems that Ray decided to tattoo you on your back, so all your dresses from now on will have low backs or will be backless. Now that you're fully committed, you'll want everyone to know that you've embraced magenta. They should realize that from your eyes, but showing off the mark of the Mint Eye will reinforce their suspicions on your new position."

The Savior beamed at you as she finished straightening out your dress and makeup, moving on to style your hair. Her fingers were deft, and they worked quickly, but Saeran did it better.

"I know your mind must be a jumble right now, but don't worry. You'll go back to normal as soon as you get a nice, long sleep. Tonight, I'm going to introduce you to the other members of my council. Others who have gone through the second commitment. You want to look pretty for their very first impression of you, don't you? Ray and I are the only ones who are already personally acquainted with you."

The Savior continued on, and you were relieved that she hadn't asked you anything. If she threw a question your way, you'd need a long time before you'd be able to answer it. "Wonderful. You're really quite beautiful, (Y/N). It's a shame you weren't already born with magenta hair and mint-green eyes. That would be really perfect, wouldn't it? Well, white hair suits you fine. Here, come, follow me, you're going to meet your fellow council members!"

The Savior's smile wasn't contagious, bright as it was. You followed the blonde woman to a part of the Mint Eye that you'd never been to before, the ceilings high enough and the chandeliers extravagant enough to put the Hall of Mirrors of the Versailles Palace to shame.

It was a long walk to the end of the hall, but when you finally reached the door, you found yourself nervous. It was strange. You couldn't form a single manual thought in your head, but you felt a rush of adrenaline at the thought of meeting the other council members. Or was it Saeran specifically that you were nervous to see?

The Savior laid a single knuckle across the door, the lonely syllable echoing throughout the hall despite its delicateness, and the door opened.

Everything afterward was a daze.

Not the same kind of daze you'd been in since leaving the Commitment Room, though. It was a more numb feeling, brought forth by the crushing realization that in the month you'd been gone, _things had changed_.

"Saeran," You whispered upon entering the room, his name possessing your lips the first time you'd opened your mouth all day.

But the male didn't stand up to greet you.

He barely even acknowledged your presence. "S..." You were about to call him again, but stopped when you saw the image before you. Saeran, laughing openly, laughing in a way that you had only seen once before, with his left arm draped around a girl you've never seen before.

"Well, (Y/N), this is my council. What's wrong, hm? Oh." The Savior followed your line of sight to where Saeran sat, and you clenched your teeth. "That's MC, our newest admit to the council. She joined last week, actually. She's...special, so she was accepted without making any primary or secondary commitments."

You didn't catch the venomous tone in the Savior's voice.

The Savior stepped further inside, her heels echoing in the small chamber, and all chatter ceased. The council members quickly darted to different seats in the room, and for the first time since your arrival, Saeran acknowledged you.

You kept your eyes on the floor, not wanting to greet anyone as the Savior gave a short speech about who you were; she took you to your seat by the hand, as if you were a child.

And in that moment, you felt like a child.

Breakable as a baby. 

Like a single caress too rough would be enough to maim you for life.

And seeing Saeran laugh so openly around another girl, staring at her with eyes full of admiration, well, he may as well have just taken your heart and used it as a punching bag in one of his workouts.

"(Y/N)?" The Savior nudged you, "Is there anything you would like to add?"

You thought about saying no. You thought about asking to be excused. You thought about ignoring the Savior.

Instead, you opted for the safest route of them all. "I look forward to working with you all in our paradise," You pulled your gaze up to Saeran, then to the brown-haired woman supposedly called MC, "Where everyone is happy."

The Savior smiled, as if that were a test, and you had selected the correct answer.

"In the magenta of dreams and hope." The council chorused back to you.

***

The Savior was the leader of the Mint Eye, the supreme ruler, the sovereign head. Her blonde hair and gorgeous, green eyes suited her. They made her look distinguished among the crowd of disciples and believers, and even the council members.

As you stood in front of the mirror, though, you realized that while her face was the _head_ of the Mint Eye, yours was the embodiment of it. With the faint touch of makeup the Savior had decorated your skin with and the simple updo she had worked your snowy white hair into, your eyes were especially prominent, practically shouting _mint eyes_ at everyone who would ever make eye contact with you.

And the dress she had selected for you to wear - it was truly stunning. The design was elegant yet provocative, the modest length and full-sleeve arms making the violet dress look almost prudishly designed, but that only furthered the provocativeness of your completely open back, where your Mint Eye tattoo caught the eye of anyone who looked your way.

Mint eyes, magenta dress; no other colors could be seen on you, with your hair bleached, and your skin faded as if someone had put a grayscale filter over the rest of your body.

The Savior was right.

You really were beautiful.

A knock killed the silence, and your eyes darted to the door, expecting it to open. When it didn't, you walked over to it in intrigue. "Yes?" You asked, opening the door a crack, sighing in relief when you saw that it was only Saeran, "Why didn't you come in after knocking?"

Saeran strolled into your room, his expression blank, "I may be supervising your work, but we're technically the same rank in the Mint Eye, now. It would be unfitting for me to enter your room without proper authorization."

You frowned.

"Why are you being so formal, Saeran?"

"The same reason you're being so distant, (Y/N)."

You pulled your gaze up from the floorboards and met Saeran's expression. He looked...hurt? Upset? What did he mean? Were you being distant? That was only because he had started it first, with MC. Or were you overreacting? Who even _was_ MC?

You groaned out loud, bringing a hand to cradle your head as you felt your head shake with a sudden earthquake of pain. "Please don't..." You whispered, unable to remember the words to communicate your desires. "Please don't be so confusing right now, Saeran. I can't handle it. My head hurts too much..."

Whatever emotion had taken control of Saeran in the previous moment, it was gone as he watched you try to soothe the pain coursing through your mind, so preoccupied that it seemed as if you had forgotten him altogether.

His own secondary commitment had been many years ago, but he still remembered how nothing was quite right until the morning after. Saeran sighed. "Let's get you to bed, princess. Come here."

You willed your legs to move forward, almost tripping on your own feet as you tried to escape the headache that had suddenly rooted itself in your mind. Before you could fall on the floor, you felt a pair of strong arms catch you. In seconds, you were being carried to your bed by those same arms.

Saeran held you upright with one hand, deftly undoing the hairstyle the Savior had done, and even managed to remove the makeup from your skin.

You hadn't even realized that you had fallen asleep until Saeran was waking up. "(Y/N)," he whispered, shaking you. "(Y/N), you can't fall asleep just yet. You need to change out of those clothes..."

"This is a new room. I don't even know where my wardrobe is, Saeran," you murmured, rubbing your eyes. You couldn't have been asleep more than a few minutes, but your head already felt clearer. "And I'm too tired to find out. I'll just sleep in this, it'll be okay."

You could practically feel Saeran roll his eyes at your words, and you heard him grumble, "You really like being treated like a princess, don't you, princess?"

You giggled lightly in return, and heard some shuffling in front of you.

You opened a single eye lazily and saw Saeran, shirtless, offering you the large white T-shirt he had been wearing when he came in. "Change into this, at least. It'll be long enough on you to cover everything, and I promise I won't peak..." Saeran made a show of turning around. "Tell me when I can look, okay?"

You rolled your eyes, too tired to argue. Without getting out of bed, you somehow shrugged the dress off your body and changed into Saeran's shirt. He was right. The shirt hid everything that needed to be hidden, but it still exposed the greater majority of your thighs. It was like another, shorter dress. Though if you shuffled around too much, you knew he'd see your bright (f/c) panties.

"Y-you can turn around now," You whispered, slightly embarrassed at the fact that you were wearing Saeran's clothes.

"Oh come on, (Y/N), really?" Saeran gestured dramatically to the small lump on the floor where you had uncouthly dumped your dress. "Alright, I'll fold this up, and then I'll see you tomorrow, okay, princess?" Saeran leaned over to plant a kiss on your cheek, but you pushed him backward.

"No." You said with a pout.

"You don't want me to fold the dress?" Saeran asked, arching an eyebrow.

"No. No, 'I'll see you tomorrow.' You're staying here tonight." You blurted, too tired to be embarrassed by the absurd request.

Saeran sputtered out a few syllables of shock, utterly unaware of how to handle the situation, so you took control, throwing a pillow at the light switch and you miraculously hit your target, leaving the room pitch black. "Good night, Saeran," you whispered, laying your head on one of the two remaining pillows, pulled Saeran into the bed, snuggling up against him as he resigned himself to his fate.

"Yeah, yeah, princess," He grumbled with a chuckle, acting amused even though you knew he was blushing as you wrapped your arms around his bare torso, "Good night."

You fell asleep within seconds, exhausted after a month of pain and suffering, and then a full day of actively following the Savior to meet with the council members. Your mind was far away, finally free to explore dreamland without promises of agony in the morning weighing down on your mind.

You slept with a smile on your face, blissfully unaware of how Saeran stared at you the whole night, the midnight moon through the window illuminating your face. You didn't feel him trace the tattoo he had needled into your once-bare back, or notice him playing with the hair he knew would never look the same, or even sense him staring at your closed eyes, where light circles from the eye brace still left a shadow on your face.

You didn't see him cry as he realized, once again, what he had done to you; and that every time he looked at your mint green eyes, he would be reminded of his sins against the world, against God, against _you_.

He stared at your soft lips, recalling how he had stolen a kiss from them in one of his attempts at getting you to drink the Elixir of Salvation. No doubt, you had no recollection of the moment—the memory drowned in the pain that followed immediately after. It was an action he regretted.

He had always wanted to kiss you, but in the right way.

Now, he didn't know if he'd ever be able to let himself get close to you again. Much less, kiss you.

As you slept, he knew you had forgiven him from the way you clung to his chest and intertwined your legs between his. He loved that quality about you. You would always forgive him whenever he messed up, give him another chance when he fell short, move on when he found himself unable to. This past month was no different in that regard, he knew. You understood his position, and you were _still_ able to forgive him for all the suffering he'd inflicted on you.

He, on the other hand, didn't think he'd ever be able to forgive himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.5k
> 
> Notes: Life is ew wtf everything sucks :\ well, not everything, but more than usual. I've been sick and, honestly, this week just hasn't been good for me. I've had almost no time whatsoever to write, and I feel strangely stressed :( Here's hoping that life gets better by the next update
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/13/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	5. V: Neutral Route (Saeran)

Saeran made sure he was gone when (Y/N) woke up.

For one, his shirt had somehow ridden up all the way up her body so that when he woke up, he practically had a full view of the girl's naked form. He kept his eyes away from her undergarments, but knew that if (Y/N) woke up and saw what a compromised position she was in, it would have been incredibly awkward for the two of them.

Well, that was a lie. He told it to himself to feel a little better when (Y/N) whined in her sleep as he pried himself from her arms.

The real reason was the crude _pang_ he felt at seeing her bleached hair. It made something inside twist with resentment and sin. Self-directed, of course.

He gazed at (Y/N)'s sleeping form, her expression neutral but her features diluted by the processes from the prior month, a constant reminder of how _he_ pulled the (h/c) from her locks, how _he_ sucked the (e/c) from her irises, how _he_ showed her a world of pain that not even the primary commitment could rival.

Saeran didn't feel worthy of (Y/N).

Shirtless, he scurried to his room and changed into the suit he was expected to be wearing at all times. Checking himself once in the mirror, he nodded at himself and headed straight down the hall. 

Only one person would be able to help him when he felt like this.

_MC._

The brown-haired girl was new, accepted into the Savior's council without pledging her primary _or_ secondary commitments. Everyone on the council wondered why the Savior was making such an exception on this seemingly normal girl, but none dared to ask.

"May I come in?" Saeran asked, knocking at her door.

"Of course," A voice chimed in return, and Saeran opened the door to see MC dressed in her violet uniform. The dress she wore was pretty, no doubt. It hung at her knees, the fabric open and swaying with every movement she made; but as Saeran's eyes drank in the sight of her, he couldn't help but be reminded of the deliciously inviting garb (Y/N) had donned the previous night, a sight no woman would ever be able to rival in his eyes.

"You look nice," Saeran commented plainly, trying to be polite.

"You're too kind, Ray," MC giggled, a high pitched noise that felt unnatural to Saeran's ears. Still, being with her was better than being with (Y/N). At least he wasn't flooded with guilt every time he saw her.

"Shall we have breakfast?" She inquired, causing Saeran to hesitate.

MC had joined the council approximately twenty days into (Y/N)'s secondary commitment. Since then, she had always taken Saeran with her when heading down to the dining hall for breakfast. Seeing as (Y/N) wasn't permitted to leave the room, Saeran had seen no issue with accompanying MC every day.

Now that (Y/N) was back, though, Saeran wasn't too sure.

"I usually eat breakfast with (Y/N)," Saeran murmured, hesitant. He already felt so guilty and horrible for putting her through that month of torture, it would be even worse if he weren't there for her now that she had returned.

But MC wasn't having it. "So? Things change. She's been here longer than I have, she knows her way to the dining room. I don't. Let's go, Ray."

Saeran bit his lip. _You should know the way by now, too,_ he thought, slightly vexed by MC's blatant refusal. "And besides," Saeran looked up as MC continued.

"You've already told me how you feel around her. If you want to stop feeling so guilty all the time, you need to stop spending time with the cause of your guilt." MC took a step toward Saeran, and Saeran resisted the urge to move backwards, "Forget about (Y/N), Saeran. You have me."

Before he could react, Saeran found himself being pulled out the door and down the hall as MC pulled him to their destination. Saeran turned MC's words over in his mind, inspecting them like a customer on the verge of buying something they were still hesitant about.

Saeran knew that he only felt guilty when he was around (Y/N). But after what he put her through, didn't he deserve to feel like crap for a little while? ...Then again, it wasn't his decision to be her handler for the secondary commitment, so why should he be punished for something he never wanted to do in the first place?

"Ray, which way?" MC asked as the two of them reached a hall crossing at the Mint Eye. Saeran removed himself from his thoughts and gestured to the right, now leading the way as they marched toward the dining hall. He walked with confidence, but his mind was elsewhere, not quite aware of his surroundings as he continued to think about (Y/N).

Avoiding her entirely was impossible. They would work together every day in the Security Room, _and_ Saeran would need to show her how to do her job. Though, he supposed, that could be changed if he spoke with the Savior.

 _No!_ Saeran thought to himself, shaking his head as he realized what he was considering, _I can't just start ignoring (Y/N)! It's bad enough that I put her through a month of torture, she'll be destroyed if she loses a friend in the process._ Saeran chuckled bitterly, _Yeah, because that's all I am to her. A friend._

Saeran sighed as he remembered what he had done on the fourth day of (Y/N)'s commitment. That kiss he had stolen...had it been her first? It certainly had been the last. Saeran had pulled back instantly, horrified at how he had betrayed the girl's trust.

The look of hurt and betrayal (Y/N) had shot him that day was still imprinted on his mind, an image weighing down on him with every step he took.

He deserved the guilt.

Saeran turned his head to the side and watched MC as she followed him. He never found himself fully able to relax around her the way he relaxed around (Y/N), something about the nasal tone in her voice always keeping him on edge. In every way, she was nothing compared to (Y/N), a mere shadow of the woman he truly loved in his heart.

But as he looked at MC, he felt nothing.

No love,and no admiration—but no guilt either.

And the guilt he felt every time he gazed into (Y/N)'s forgiving eyes was going to kill him if he kept hanging out with her.

"We should eat together every day," Saeran found himself saying before he had registered the words, "From now on, I mean."

MC smiled brightly, her eyes dazzling like the moon at his words. Saeran suppressed the thought that if hers eyes dazzled like the moon, (Y/N)'s glistened like a thousand stars.

"That's perfect, Ray!" MC took a step closer, grabbing onto Saeran's arm in a way that only (Y/N) had ever done before. Saeran pulled away, the grip seeming to suffocate him, but MC didn't let go. "See, it's easy to move on from (Y/N). In no time at all, you won't be feeling any guilt at all, and you'll be completely happy again!"

Saeran looked from MC, to the floor, to the door to the dining hall that now stood in front of them.

He really, really hoped MC was right.

***

The atmosphere in the Security Room was tense, to say the least. (Y/N) had her face set in a firm scowl as she worked, only opening her mouth to talk about the work Saeran gave her and shooting down Saeran's first two attempts at starting casual conversation.

He was currently trying to engage her in a third attempt.

"So, how was your morning?" He asked awkwardly, half of him not expecting an answer.

"Good. Really good. You know the best part?" (Y/N) murmured, her fingers not slowing as they danced across the keyboard while she typed code, "Waking up an hour early so I could spend time with you, only to realize you had ditched me and left for breakfast with _MC_."

Saeran swallowed. Hard. He wasn't sure if he preferred working in angry silence to this or not.

"That was _our_ thing, Saeran. Or do you not care anymore? Did you only stay with me last night out of pity? Was that supposed to be some sort of apology for being my handler during my second commitment?"

Saeran hesitated to answer, not sure if (Y/N) was just ranting or if she wanted an actual response.

When she didn't say anything further, he opened his mouth. "I..."

Only then did he realize he had nothing to say.

What was he doing with MC? Why had he asked _her_ of all people to continue eating breakfast with him?

Saeran peeked at (Y/N) through the corner of his eye, and then he remembered.

Despite the room being dark, (Y/N)'s bleached white hair was bright as ever, pretty as it hung loose on her shoulders. The girl's eyes were drilling holes into the monitor screen, no longer a soft (e/c) but forever cursed to be a striking mint green instead.

Saeran's stomach churned as he stared at her, feeling sick to his stomach when he recalled what she once looked like and what he had turned her into.

He pulled his gaze back to the screen and stared straight ahead. How pathetic. He couldn't even look at her.

"I'm sorry," He murmured, breathing out shakily.

He didn't tell (Y/N) what he was apologizing for, the words too emotional for him to ever bring past his lips. How could he? He wasn't a master interpreter of feelings, he didn't know how else to handle the situation. _I'm sorry, (Y/N)_ , he thought to himself, knowing that his decision was made. He couldn't be around her anymore. He couldn't talk to her anymore. He could barely look at her anymore without a swarm of guilt and regret and self-hatred encompassing all his senses. The worst part was, he deserved it. So there was only one thing left to do.

Run from the problem.

 _I'm sorry, (Y/N)_ , Saeran thought as he closed his eyes, resigning himself to the fact that he wouldn't, couldn't, have her. He knew, with time, that he would be able to accept that reality. After all, he had MC. And while MC wasn't (Y/N), she was...charming in a different way. Perhaps he could love her the way he loved (Y/N)?

He heard the _click-click_ of (Y/N)'s keyboard slow until he could tell she had finally stopped typing. Through the corner of his eye, he saw her figure turn to face him, but not a muscle in Saeran's body obeyed his will to turn and meet her eyes.

"Saeran," (Y/N) whispered, her voice soft enough to be caught in the tangle of wires separating their feet. Saeran wanted to turn to her. Face her. Hug her. Hold her. But his body refused to move. "Fine. Be that way."

The typing resumed on her keyboard and (Y/N) directed her attention back to her work. Saeran sighed to himself, gazing at the code he was writing to reinforce the security around the Mint Eye. He didn't deserve a girl like (Y/N).

 _Our friendship will never be the same again_ , he thought, regretting not fighting the Savior's decision to make him (Y/N)'s secondary commitment handler. His only hope of friendship was now MC.

 _And it's my fault_ , he thought, too blind to see that (Y/N) wanted him as much as he wanted her, too desperate to realize that turning to MC would only further wreck himself, too foolish to know that, by choosing MC over (Y/N) for such a stupid reason, he had shredded his best chance at happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.9k
> 
> Notes: Welp, the next chapter brings us into Saeyoung/luciel/707's main arc! Ngl, I'm looking forward to that :) I've actually prewritten a decent amount in this book so that I can continue to update twice a week, so, just looking ahead, I can tell you guys that the next chapter is where this fic really begins to pick up so I hope you guys are looking forward to that as much as I am! :)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/16/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	6. VI: Neutral Route (Y/N)

The Mint Eye. Where everyone is happy. Except you, apparently.

Ever since your conversation with Saeran in the Security Room, neither of you had spoken to the other. _And a full month had passed_. Saeran forwarded all your assignments and work to you via email, and every time you tried to consider an excuse to talk to him, he walked away before you could even open your mouth.

The Savior met with you daily, asking how things were going at work in the Security Room, how you were handling the responsibilities of being a council member, and how life was in general.

At first, it was easy to tell the truth. _I love the dresses, Savior. The workload is fine, Savior. I'm excited for tonight's recruitment ceremony, Savior._

Then, she began asking about Saeran.

The more she prodded, the more you came to realize that the innocent boy you once treasured so much no longer loved you the way he did before.

_"Oh, (Y/N)," The Savior had murmured, hugging you as you wept into her arms, "I didn't think he'd replace you so soon. I'm sorry, my sweetling, I truly am."_

Was she, though? It felt like everything that had gone wrong in your relationship was the cause of the Savior.

The Savior was the one who suggested having you join her council.

The Savior was the one who ordered Saeran to be your handler for your secondary commitment.

The Savior was the one who brought MC and Saeran together.

_MC..._

You closed your fist and inhaled sharply. You didn't want to waste another second of your thoughts on such a horrible girl.

She didn't love Saeran, not the way you did, but still, the boy looked at her as if she were a better version of you. You'd even heard Saeran call her his "queen."

You chuckled darkly, remembering the days when you were his princess, when he was all that mattered to you and when you were all that mattered him.

_"Princess?" Saeran's hesitant voice called out from behind you, the man unsure of whether it was truly you or not. "There you are," He smiled and wrapped you in a hug from the behind, "What are you doing here?"_

_He looked around and studied the location. The two of you stood in the Mint Eye's flower garden, a gorgeous garth with layers upon layers of flowers. Saeran knew it was his personal favorite place in the Mint Eye, but you had never shown as much interest in it._

_You smiled at Saeran and turned around in his hug to fully embrace him, giving him a quick peck on the cheek as you did so. "Do you know what day it is?"_

_Saeran shook his head and cocked his head to the side, his expression confused._

_Dates didn't matter in the Mint Eye. Everyone was removed from time and placed into a snapshot of happiness and_ _magenta_ _seemingly outside of life itself._

_"Well, I've been asking the Savior, and today..." You paused for dramatic effect and jumped into Saeran's arms, "Is your birthday!"_

_Saeran grabbed your waist, quickly regaining his balance as he balanced your weight as you excitedly wrapped your legs around his waist and arms around his neck, eagerly waiting for his response."My birthday...? How did you find out?" Saeran looked even more confused, surprised that you were so excited by such a simple fact and further shocked that you cared._

_"I told you," You poked Saeran's cheek playfully, "I asked the Savior! Happy birthday!" You wrapped him into a hug, and Saeran staggered back at the sudden movement, still unsure of why you were so jubilant._

_"Err...thanks? Why are you so happy, though?" Saeran inquired._

_"Well..." You let your voice trail off in the wind, thinking for a moment about how to word your thoughts. "Since my parents died, the orphanage couldn't find my actual birth certificate. So I've never been able to celebrate my birthday...which is why I know how sad it is not to have one! So I want to celebrate your birthday with you! So we can both be happy together!"_

_Saeran stood there in shock, unsure of how you could be so happy for someone else when it undoubtedly brought you sadness of your own. "(Y/N)..." He whispered, surprised by your natural selflessness once more._

_"Wait here; I even got you a birthday gift!" You said, jumping out of Saeran's arms and sprinting out of the male's reach to a nearby bench, whereupon you picked something small. "Here!" You exclaimed eagerly, holding out what Saeran realized was a little potted flower with a mint-green stem and white petals, tinted red at the tips."It's just like you!" You giggled._

_Saeran smiled at your thoughtfulness and led you to the edge of the garden, opening a locked door and motioning for you to enter. "This is..." He trailed off before regaining his confidence. He had never shown anyone this place before. Only the Savior even knew it existed. "This is my private garden, princess. I want to give you something, too."_

_"Why?" You asked._

_Saeran picked a long rose with (h/c) petals and an (e/c) bud in the center, handing it to you. "You said you don't know your birthday, right? Then...share one with me." Saeran tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and smiled softly, "Happy birthday, princess."_

You smiled at the memory.

But those days were over. There was no point in smiling about them any longer. You pulled a stolen believer robe over your dress and inhaled sharply, hitting the _Enter_ button and running the code you had spent the past week perfecting.

As the program began to execute, you watched the timer pop up on your screen and sprinted to the door, exiting the Security Room as soon as you checked to confirm that the hallway was empty.

You heard the door click behind you and tried to calm your heart in its rapid beating.

 _There's no going back now_.

If anyone caught you, you were dead. If anyone saw you, you were dead. _Well, if I make it out of here, I'm still probably dead_ , you thought to yourself before shaking the thought, more focused on sprinting down the corridor.

You had half an hour to escape the Mint Eye; after that, the program you just ran would delete itself, and all the doors you had locked would unlock themselves, meaning that the halls would be filled with believers and disciples.

 _And the alarm will ring_ , you thought to yourself, pushing past the first door.

You had to take two rights, a left, then another right, and then you'd be able to escape through an open window that was being replaced.

You sprinted down the hall, reminding yourself that your program had accounted for each and every person in the Mint Eye that could jeopardize your plan. This would work. _It has to_ , you thought, continuing your sprint.

There was no way to tell how much time had passed. The only clocks in the entire Mint Eye were in the Savior's room and in the Security Room, both long behind you.

But whatever hour it was, you had made it in time.

You slammed the door behind you, letting your back slide down the wall as your heart calmed down. The window hadn't been replaced yet. It was fully open, the entire room smelling like freshly cut grass and the sweet smell of nature.

You hadn't realized how much you'd missed the smell of nature.

You dragged yourself up despite the wobbly sensation in your legs, (apparently, nonstop sprinting without any prior exercise for years is a bad idea) and stared at the open window.

It was large enough for you to climb out comfortably, literally a window of opportunity that gave you your ticket to freedom.

You poked your head out and looked outside, grinning as your eyes saw greener greens and bluer blues, and then you looked down.

 _Fuck_.

"Who the hell was that?" You whispered in sync as a voice shouted it from below.

You took a step back from the window, desperately looking around the empty room for something, anything, to defend yourself with.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck!_

No one was supposed to be sent to repair this window, the interior of the room was supposed to be under renovation! Who were those people?

You closed your eyes briefly and tried to recall the image you saw: two men, climbing up a rope ladder they had hung outside the window.

Who were they?

You tried to picture all the members of the perimeter staff, twenty faces and bios you had committed to memory before going through with your plan to escape. _Red hair and golden eyes_ , you thought to yourself, _That guy isn't on the perimeter defense staff! Who is he?_

You thought about jumping out of the window, over the two men who had been crawling up, and then realized with horror that if you tried to jump, the only thing waiting for you at the bottom would be death.

How stupid.

The Mint Eye was six stories tall, and in your elaborate plan to escape, you hadn't secured a ladder.

 _Fuck_.

"Put your hands where I can see them!" An angry voice shouted before a taser gun peaked out from the base of the window.

You squeaked as the gun pointed toward you, and the two men you had previously seen pulled themselves through the window, their expressions hard as they studied your shaking form. "P...please don't hurt me," You whispered, clenching your eyes shut.

"What are you doing here?" The brown-haired man asked, not lowering the taser gun.

"I...was just checking the room, for, uh..." Your mind blanked. This wasn't part of the plan. Those men weren't supposed to be there!

"You're lying!" The redhead shouted, taking an aggressive step toward you before the brunette man held him back;

"Who are you?" The brunette said. "Depending on your answer, we'll let you live or die. Be truthful, or I won't hesitate to use this. And believe me, death by taser is a lot longer and more painful than by bullet."

You swallowed when you heard the threat, the pressure too much. _Fuck_ , you thought, probably for the last time in your miserable life. _Is this the end for me?_

"Well?" The redhead asked, his voice agitated.

 _Fuck it, (Y/N), just tell them the truth, and maybe they'll be surprised enough for you to escape through the window_.

You nodded your head, pretending that your plan didn't have half a million flaws in it and opened your mouth, "I-I was just trying to escape...I haven't hurt anyone! No one even knows! I swear, if you let me go, none of this will show on the security feeds or anything! It can be o-our secret."

You kept your hands above your head and bit your lip as the two men exchanged glances. They seemed to be silently communicating entirely through their eyes.

A minute later, the taser gun was no longer pointed at you.

"How convenient. You're sneaking out, is it? Well, we're sneaking in." The brown-haired man crossed his arms, "We're here to retrieve a woman named MC. Brunette. Skinny. Annoying. You know her?"

You laughed lightly, feeling a little less pressure on your shoulders now that the gun was no longer pointed your way. "MC? Yeah, I know her. I know where she is. If you let me go, I'll tell you everything you need to know," You said, trying to bargain your way out of the situation.

"If we let you go? It doesn't look like you have a way out, girl." The redhead blurted, his eyes scanning your figure, "What, were you planning to jump out the window?"

You pursed your lips, knowing that you had no response.

"Tell you what," The redhead said, unlatching the rope ladder's grip on the windowsill, letting it fall to the ground, six long stories below. "You don't have a way out of here. We still do." He pointed to his backpack, and you could only begin to imagine all the equipment he had stored inside, "If you help us find MC, we'll take you with us outside. You get what you want. We get what we want. Do you understand?"

The man didn't wait for you to respond before he began bombarding you with questions. Where was MC at this moment? How could they get to MC? Who should they avoid? What was the quickest route to her? How could they get back? Were there any alarms?

"The alarm!" You murmured to yourself, realizing the issue. "Shit!"

"What? What's with the alarm?!" The red-haired man, who had told you to call him 'Seven,' shook your shoulders, and you could tell he was just as worried as you.

"When escaping, I ran a timer-based program that would prevent certain doors from opening and any alarms from triggering. But once the timer runs out..."

The men in front of you groaned.

"The alarm is going to go off."

Seven's expression changed. He didn't waste a moment of time, understanding its importance, "How long is the timer?"

"Half an hour. It must be almost up, by now. Once that alarm goes off, all doors will lock, and you'll be stuck...this may not be the best time to try to get MC." You bit your lip, desperately hoping that the men would agree with you and retreat, hopefully taking you with them.

"This may not be the best time, but it's the only time," The brown-haired man, who had introduced himself as Seven's maid 'Mary,' said, gritting his teeth. "We won't be able to come back a second time to rescue MC."

Seven shrugged his backpack off and pulled out a laptop, "If you're experienced enough to write a code that sophisticated, you can do more. Use this to hack in and prevent the alarm from going off. Remember, girl," He shoved the device into your hands and headed for the door, gesturing for Mary to follow him, "At this point, your safety depends entirely on us."

You watched in despair as Seven and Mary ran through the door you had come from. You sighed.

Here you were, so close to escaping the Mint Eye and all the pain it had caused you, yet at the same time, so far. You could smell the freedom, every breeze bringing in the scent of pines and grass and sweetness, but what use would freedom be if you were free from life itself?

You didn't want to die.

Even then, you knew that much. But by that point, things felt out of your control.

Your life was in the hands of two men who wouldn't even give you their real names: a number and a maid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.5k
> 
> Notes: the amount of chocolate i just ate is obscene, i will definitely regret it tomorrow. :/
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/20/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	7. VII: Neutral Route (Y/N)

One would think that a person working in the Security Room would know precisely how to infiltrate its alarms and defenses.

You cursed at yourself, wondering why you hadn't thought to create some kind of back door that you could activate, like a god mode that would give you full control over the Mint Eye. Such a thing was definitely possible, yet in your emotional rush to never see Saeran again, you hadn't thought of your plan going awry as it had.

 _Even if Seven and Mary hadn't been here, my escape still would have been impossible_ , you thought to yourself, aggravated that you hadn't realized earlier that six stories was not a jumpable distance.

 _Close...so close_ , you thought to yourself, fingers flying across Seven's keyboard like birds landing on a cold lake. You were able to find the timer, just not a method to lengthen or pause it. _Shit, shit, shit, they have less than a minute left._

You held back tears and worked faster, not even sure of what commands you were inputting but desperately aware that you were trying _something_.

_10..._

You tried to run your code, desperately hoping that it would be able to exploit the one weakness you knew existed in the Mint Eye's software security.

_8..._

There was an error in the code. Your eyes scanned the text, looking to see if you had missed a semicolon or to close a parenthesis.

_5..._

You began to pray that you had made a mistake writing the original program, that when the timer ran out, no alarm would ring, that some god above would magically whisk you out of the situation you were in.

_2..._

You stared at the screen helplessly, out of options, out of ideas.

_1._

_Timer complete._

The alarms began blaring at an agonizing volume, temporarily impeding your ability to think.

You heard the Savior speak over the loudspeakers, her prerecorded voice calm as she instructed believers and disciples alike to please remain calm and to not leave their respective rooms, and that no, this was not a drill.

You let out an angry cry of frustration, irritated at your shortcomings.

When you got out of this, you'd make sure you were a better hacker, that you could break your way into any system well within the time limit. When you escaped, you were going to...

 _When I escape?_ You thought to yourself, scoffing. _How the hell am I going to escape now?_

There was nothing you could do anymore. Nothing. 

Except...

It was a stupid idea, but it was the best idea you had. Better yet, you were already in the system, so you knew exactly how to execute the command.

You glanced down at Seven's computer and saw a small speaker built into the bottom. The audio would be poor, but it would work.

You fiddled with the keyboard for a few moments longer, trying to ignore the blaring alarms that were making this entire process more aggravating. Then, after a moment of hesitation, you hit the record button.

"Believers and disciples of the Mint Eye, this is council member (Y/N) with an urgent message," You said, keenly aware of how you sounded as your voice echoed back to you through the loudspeaker where the Savior's voice had once played.

"There are two intruders in the Mint Eye, dressed in full-black attire. They likely have stolen robes and are dressed as believers, among yourselves. They were last seen heading from the dining hall to the Savior's chambers. Their intentions are to kidnap our Savior and destroy the magenta we have worked hard to build."

You took a breath, trying to figure out what to say to best rile up the believers, "If you are in an open-access hallway, please head for the first floor and prepare to apprehend the fugitives. Thank you. The alarm will continue until the intruders have been captured."

You closed the program, and let out a shaky sigh, petrified for the sake of Seven and Mary.

Your lies should be enough to rid them of all the stranglers wandering around on the sixth floor; no believer would waste an opportunity to protect their precious Savior. Everyone would be rushing down to the first floor...and by confessing that the two had 'likely' stolen believers' robes, the believers would drive themselves mad with suspicion. 

It wouldn't be long before the believers on the sixth floor overrode the locks on the doors themselves.

You closed your eyes and hoped that Seven and Mary would be smart enough to wait until then.

And, strangely enough, you found yourself wishing for Saeran.

_Saeran..._

He would know that been scheming to escape.

If you hadn't made that announcement, he might have thought that the infiltrators kidnapped you or something, that you hadn't willingly left after promising him you wouldn't.

Then again, those promises were made eons ago, when he was a different person.

A kinder person.

A more loving person.

_Saeran thought you had a cold. He'd noticed that your nose had been red and that you'd been sniffling all day, but not for a moment did he consider that you might have been crying._

_"Come on, princess, you have to drink soup if you want to feel better," Saeran murmured, pressing the spoon against your closed lips._

_"Soup isn't what will make me feel better," You grumbled, grudgingly accepting the hot liquid._

_"Hmm? This is what the Savior did for me when I was sick, though, and it helped," Saeran said, scooping up another spoon of soup._

_You shook your head. "Saeran, I'm not sick."_

_The white-haired boy didn't respond, thinking you were lying or that you didn't like the taste of the soup he was feeding you. He pushed your head back down into the pillow you were resting on and dabbed a napkin at the corner of your lip where he had poured a bit too much soup in too little time._

_"Saeran, I mean it."_

_The boy hummed in response, pushing another spoonful of soup to your lips._

_"Saera-mmf!"_

_The stubborn albino shoved the spoon into your mouth mid-sentence, impressively devoted to forcing you to finish the liquid._

_"Saeran, I wasn't sniffling earlier," You rolled your eyes and brought a hand up to his, pushing his spoon away from you, "I was crying, okay?"_

_Finally, Saeran stopped and put the soup down on the floor, and then he was on your bed, pulling you into his lap as he showered you with "Why?" and "What's wrong?" He turned your face toward his so that you couldn't look away and stroked your hair, confused at how you could have been crying when you seemed so happy._

_"It's just..." You felt your throat blocking up as you remembered the dark thoughts that had caused you to cry in the first place, "This can't last, can it?"_

_Saeran cocked his head to the side, as he always did._

_"What can't? The soup?"_

_You let out a light giggle, Saeran's antics never failing to make you smile. "This. Us. The Mint Eye. Being happy."_

_Saeran sighed when he realized what you were asking._

_Too long, you had been miserable. Abused as a child and then brought to an orphanage that you never felt safe in. Life had been nothing but a series of curveballs where happiness was like a home run: brief and rare._

_"No," He whispered, stroking your hair, "You and I are forever. We'll always be happy together. For as long as we're in the Mint Eye."_

_You smiled sadly. Happiness never lasted. You knew that._

_But Saeran believed. He was relentless. He spent that whole night convincing you of what a fantastic place the Mint Eye was, and how as long as you and he stayed there, the magenta would keep you happy forever._

That was the first night you two spent together.

It was, without a doubt, one of the happiest nights of your life, and you didn't cry again for a long time afterward.

The second night you two spent together was half a month ago, restless and foreboding as whatever friendship you two shared was crushed later that very day.

 _Happiness is forever, eh, Saeran?_ You scoffed. _Happiness is a lie. The only variable is how long you can keep lying to yourself._

You stared at the door in front of you, shutting the laptop Seven gave you.

You'd done everything you could from where you stood. Everything else was up to him and Mary. _And MC_ , you added as an afterthought. Because to you, that's all she was. An afterthought.

You began counting the seconds as they passed by.

It wound up being three-hundred and eighty-four seconds before you stopped.

 _Footsteps outside the door_ , you realized. Multiple pairs. They were trying to be quiet, but after being abused as a child, your ears had grown used to listening for any indication of something headed your way. Especially if that 'something' could cause you pain.

You slowly shifted to a standing position so that, whoever came in, be it a disciple or Saeran or the Savior herself, you wouldn't go down without a fight.

But the amount of relief you felt at seeing the familiar blob of red as the cautiously opened the door was unlike any comfort you'd ever felt before. At that moment, you could have hugged Seven as he glared daggers at you in a familiar way that you couldn't quite place.

"(Y/N), is it?" Mary asked, looking you up and down, "Good work on the announcement. The believers were in chaos, suspecting each other and practically rioting over getting out of the room we wound up locked in."

You nodded your head, not quite expecting the compliment, and handed Seven's laptop over to him.

He didn't bother acknowledging you and simply set to dropping a ladder down from the window. "We'll go down the ladder in order of importance." He looped one end of the rope around the windowsill, and you winced; it didn't look very stable. "First MC, then me," he looped the other side of the rope ladder around his knot and took a step back, "Then the maid, then you."

You ignored his blatant insult, that you were the least important of the group, and nodded your head. MC was hesitant about traveling down the rope ladder, asking Seven a million questions about what you were doing there and why she had to go first when the rope ladder looked so unsteady. After Mary threatened to push her out of the window, though, she complied and began climbing down.

When it got to your turn to climb down, you tried not to think about the fact that if Mary looked up, he'd see that under your robe you were still wearing your magenta dress which, when looked at from the bottom, gave him a too-perfect view of your underwear.

Still, you didn't want to be like MC, so you didn't complain.

The climb was treacherously long, your heart beating a mile a minute with every step you took. As soon as MC hit the bottom, she began calling for the rest of you to hurry up, her shrill voice disturbingly loud in the quiet night.

You, Mary, and Seven all knew that if she kept yelling, someone would hear.

"Shut up!" Seven hissed, trying to keep his voice low. "You're going to get us caught!"

"Me? I'm not the one going at the speed of a snail! You need to-"

The rest of her voice was muffled when you heard Seven drop from the ladder and start berating her for compromising the mission. Amused, you glanced downward to observe the spectacle and only then realized just how high up you were.

Mary motioned to do the same, his sharp jerk downward shaking the ladder.

With the sudden dizziness you felt at realizing how high you were coupled by Mary's jerk of the ladder, you felt your fingers lose their grip. In your haste to rework your fingers onto the ladder, you barely noticed your feet slipping off their base, and without even realizing what was happening, you found yourself falling.

Mary tried to grip your wrist, but he was too late, his fingers holding you by your arm for a millisecond before gravity pulled you down onto the hard, unforgiving ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.1k
> 
> Notes: Ngl my life has gotten so much better between this and my past update it's crazy (and probably directly related to the fact that I haven't had any school) x3 things are looking up, though! 2020 might not be as bad as i initially thought :D
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/23/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	8. VIII: Neutral Route (Luciel)

Luciel was the first one at (Y/N)'s side after she fell, shaking her body, desperately hoping that she was still conscious.

"The fall wasn't enough to kill her," Vanderwood murmured, his voice calm as he studied the girl where she had fallen. She had landed in a bush, the robe she had once worn now shredded but protecting most of her skin where it remained unpierced by the thorns. "Help me get her out, Luciel."

The two of them pulled her body up from the bush carefully, discarding the robe she was wearing, leaving it among the shrubs. In its torn state, there was no point in taking it with them.

"Let's leave her here. She's part of Rika's personal council, she's one of them," MC said, already walking away.

"No," Luciel blurted, picking her body up, "She was escaping when we found her, she's not on their side. And she helped us escape. If we leave her, she's as good as dead."

Vanderwood arched an eyebrow at the redhead, "Since when did you start caring about random girls you meet on missions?"

Luciel ignored the question, heaving the (Y/N)'s body over his shoulders, trying not to think about how his hand was resting on the bare skin of her back or how the dress she was wearing was riding up on her thighs. "What's with these outfits, MC? Was there some kind of party at the Mint Eye just now?"

MC turned around and watched Luciel with narrowed eyes as she saw him bringing (Y/N), "No. It's part of the uniform that Rika made us wear."

"Gotta say, this chick wears her uniform better than you," Vanderwood said, smirking. He never made any motion to hide his dislike for MC, and Luciel had to admit that his boss was right with that last comment. "Alright, here's the car. Luciel, text V and tell him that the rescue mission was a success."

Now it was Luciel's turn to arch his eyebrow. "A success?" He awkwardly wedged (Y/N)'s body into the back seat before taking his place in the front by Vanderwood, "We're bringing one extra back with us. The last time I did that, you wouldn't stop calling me a screwup, and all I did was bring a cat."

Vanderwood rolled his eyes and started the car, seeing that everyone was inside, "This girl is useful. You saw what she did back during the mission, the agency needs more people like her."

Luciel swallowed and made no comment, ignoring the anger he felt at Vanderwood's words. How could he send someone from an already fucked-up organization like the Mint Eye to an even worse place? The agency was for those who had no other options in life.

Surely this girl's life wasn't fucked up enough for her to turn to that?

Luciel glanced at (Y/N) in the rearview mirror, noting her bleached hair and tattoo. What other options could a girl like that have? MC said she was a council member, right? How far had she gone in the Mint Eye? _And what went so wrong that she tried to escape?_

Luciel pushed the thoughts from his mind, gazing forward as Vanderwood sped by the dirt road. The cabin they were heading to was far; far enough that the Mint Eye wouldn't be searching for them, but close enough to fix things if the rescue mission went wrong.

"Sleep now, Luciel," Vanderwood instructed.

Luciel knew the truer meaning to his words. _You've got work to do when we get back._ Still, he found himself able to close his eyes and drift off. It had been thirty hours since he last slept, he deserved a break.

***

When Luciel woke up, it wasn't to Vaderwood's voice. Or even MC's.

His eyes shot open, feeling strangely refreshed. Registering the picture in front of him, Luciel realized what must have happened.

 _Vanderwood let me sleep in?_ Luciel chuckled, amused. His boss must have felt sorry for him, after the craziness of the rescue mission. No doubt, they all thought they were done for until they heard (Y/N)'s voice over the loudspeaker. Hers was an impressively quick reaction time, Luciel noted with a hint of satisfaction, before stretching and pulling himself out of the car.

 _If he was going to let me sleep, he may as well have let me do it in a bed instead of in the car_ , Luciel thought to himself, stretching his neck out. "E-excuse me?"

Luciel stiffened when he heard the sound that must have woken him up. He turned around and stared at the white-haired girl who had spoken. "What?"

"C-can you untie me?" (Y/N) mumbled, nodding down toward the ropes that were binding her.

"Who tied you up?" Luciel murmured in disbelief as he walked to her side of the car, pulling a bloodied knife from his boot to saw away at the ropes.

He heard (Y/N) gasp. "Who's blood is that?"

Luciel didn't bother answering, freeing her hands and then setting to freeing her legs.

"Or do I not want to know?" She asked with a bitter chuckle at the end.

"I didn't _kill_ anyone," Luciel said bluntly, motioning for her to follow him into the cabin. "Not yesterday, at least. Come on."

It must have been early morning, the sky gloomy without the sun to smile on it, not even birds out yet. Luciel could hear voices from inside the cabin, though. Makes sense. Neither the Mint Eye nor the RFA nor the agency functioned on normal business hours.

He banged on the door, two _martelé_ sounds, the noise disrupting the eerily calm scene. It wasn't long before his knocks were answered. "Took you long enough," MC said, opening the door for him.

She closed it before (Y/N) could enter, though, temporarily leaving the girl dumbfounded by the catty action.

"Seriously, MC?" Luciel groaned, not in the mood for MC's antics.

"Yes. We need to discuss why she was even brought back here. I have a lot of questions for you two." MC said, crossing her arms, looking back and forth between Vanderwood and Luciel, trying to figure out who she could trust to take her side in the argument they all knew was about to ensue.

"Okay," Luciel said, walking around MC and opening the door, gesturing (Y/N) inside, "If we're going to be asking questions, why don't I start: who tied her up?"

Vanderwood's eyes widened, and he turned to glare at MC, "Seriously?" He asked, utterly unimpressed.

MC looked surprised, "I saved Luciel's life! You," She pointed at Vanderwood, "You left him in the car! If I hadn't tied her up, he would have woken up to her trying to choke him to death or something!"

Luciel rolled his eyes, a retort already on his tongue when (Y/N)'s soft voice interrupted them.

"Your name's Luciel?" (Y/N) was looking at him.

Luciel looked away, even more irritated with MC now. "Yeah. What, did you believe my name was Seven?"

(Y/N) shook her head, "No! I just...Luciel is a nice name. It's sort of angelic, if you think about it."

Vanderwood snorted. "This guy? Angelic? You should have seen him in the Mint Eye with that dagger of his, I swear, he was about to revoke his God and slice them a-"

"Shut up, Vanderwood," Luciel hissed, interrupting his boss.

"Vanderwood, eh? Yeah, I think that name suits you a bit better than 'Mary.'" (Y/N) said, chuckling to herself with a soft smile on her face.

"Hello? Guys? Why are you talking to her? _She doesn't belong here._ "

Through the corner of his eye, Luciel saw (Y/N) bite her lip at MC's last words. The redhead felt an involuntary urge to comfort her, wrap an arm around her shoulder and tell her that MC was just a selfish bitch who didn't know what she was saying, but he kept himself grounded. It wouldn't be fitting for him to get attached to someone he barely knew.

"MC, this is my cabin, not yours. Luciel and I brought you back from the Mint Eye at V's request, I would have left you there. The rescue mission was a favor, so be thankful." Vanderwood said bluntly, pouring coffee into three mugs, sliding one to Luciel, keeping one to himself, and offering the third to (Y/N).

"Your 'rescue mission' was weeks late!" MC shouted, her face full of anger, "You know what they could have done to me? Just think about what they did to _her!"_

Luciel glanced at (Y/N), noting how the girl swallowed a lump in her throat at MC's words. "Tell them, _council member (Y/N)_ ," MC mocked, "Or are you scared that they'll leave you once they find out how broken you are?" MC took a step toward (Y/N), "Scared that they'll leave you like _Ray?"_

"Enough!" (Y/N) shouted. The noise was new to Luciel's ears, and even Vanderwood looked surprised as he saw the soft-spoken girl say, with tears in her eyes, "You win, MC! I'll leave."

(Y/N) turned to the door, readily heading out the way she came in, but Vanderwood put a hand up against the door frame before she could open it. "Sorry, girl-err, (Y/N), but you can't leave."

(Y/N) looked at him through wary eyes. Luciel noticed how tired she looked, despite having been knocked out for the past six hours. "Why? Am I a prisoner now?" Luciel found himself bothered by the nonchalance at which the girl asked such a drastic question, as if the worst had already been done to her, and she had nothing left to fear. What had she been through? The redhead remembered MC's angry words, _Tell them how broken you are,_ and then shook his head, telling himself that it was none of his business.

"Prisoner? God, no. You've just come from the Mint Eye. You can't expect me to believe that you have a home waiting for you," Vanderwood pulled MC into the living room, leaving Luciel to follow and MC to stomp off.

When (Y/N) shook her head, Vanderwood continued, "Precisely. For now, we can give you shelter at this cabin. Our work with the Mint Eye isn't done, and your skills as a hacker are....impressive, to say the least, and you're better acquainted with the Mint Eye than all of us combined. You'll be useful to us."

"And after you no longer have any use for me?"

"Then I'll hook you up with my agency. You'll get to continue working and will be provided shelter and protection." Vanderwood left no room for rejection in his pitch to MC, leaning back like he had it all planned out.

The room was quiet for a moment.

"And if I refuse?" (Y/N) asked, voice timid.

"Don't." Luciel found himself saying, "Don't refuse."

Unlike Vanderwood's words, Luciel's had a tone of request. There was something else, too, what was it? Desperation? Hope? Fear?

"I see," (Y/N) said, taking another sip of coffee, "Then I accept your offer, Mr. Vanderwood."

"No need for the 'Mister.' Just Vanderwood is fine." The man chuckled at (Y/N)'s formality. "Is your real name (Y/N)? Or is that a name they gave you at the Mint Eye?"

"It's my own."

"Very well, then. Luciel, I'm going to V's room. MC's probably already in there...ignore any shouting. I'll see you two in a couple hours."

With that, he left the Luciel with (Y/N).

The first minute was awkward, neither person quite trying to start a conversation with the other. Finally, though, (Y/N) spoke up. "Who carried me back?"

Luciel looked up from his coffee mug, where he had been studying his reflection. "What? Oh. Yeah, that was Vanderwood." The redhead didn't know why he was lying, but something about the way this girl was looking at him made him feel too vulnerable to tell her the truth. "He said we couldn't leave you after all the help you did for us at the Mint Eye." Luciel's voice was met by silence, so he tried to fill it, "Thanks, by the way."

"No problem. I forgot a ladder, so it's not like I would have been able to escape without your help either."

"That's pretty dumb," Luciel blurted, not entirely filtering his thoughts.

"I know."

A second of silence ensued, and then the two burst into amused chuckles. When the laughter died down, (Y/N) continued, "So, uh, what happened to my robe?"

"It got pretty wrecked when you fell, took most of your damage for you - though I guess you're still pretty beat up. You should get those looked at," Luciel murmured, gesturing to the plethora of cuts and bruises (Y/N)'s body was littered with, particularly her wrist from when Vanderwood had tried to save her fall. "...Need help?"

Luciel wasn't quite sure why he offered, but when (Y/N) accepted, he found himself readily completing the task. He had dressed wounds before, much deeper cuts, but his hands shook ever so slightly as he tried to keep his touch delicate so as to not to hurt (Y/N). "Sorry, sorry," he said, clasping her unbruised arm, "You can squeeze my hand if you want. I know that the alcohol stings like a bitch."

He felt his heart beat a little faster when he heard (Y/N) chuckle, and even faster when she began clinging to his hand, but he managed to keep a blush off his face as he worked.

"Do you always look so serious?" (Y/N) asked him as he dabbed a cotton ball at a cut along her back.

"Do you always dress so gorgeous?" Luciel said, regretting the words as soon as they left his mouth. _Real smooth, dill hole,_ he told himself _, You just called her gorgeous. Way to be a creep._

"Oh," (Y/N) giggled, "Are we playing the questions game?"

Luciel smiled, "I don't see why not."

"Well then, I guess I'll answer your question first...The Savior has a very formal dress code for her council members. We're the face of the magenta, of the Mint Eye, right? So, we have to have mint eyes and magenta dresses. And bleached white hair. Honestly, though, if it were up to me, I'd have picked a more practical dress..." (Y/N) pinched the satin fabric of her dress and scrunched her nose up cutely.

"Who's the Savior? And how does he change your eye color?" Luciel replied.

"That's two questions. Plus, you're supposed to be answering one of mine," (Y/N) said. "So, is it true? Do you always look so serious?"

Luciel thought to himself for a moment. On the RFA messenger, he was as far from serious as night is from day. In truth, though, the last time he had been genuinely carefree was back when he still had Saeran. Back when he still called himself Saeyoung.

"I guess so," He said, bandaging (Y/N)'s wrist, "But sometimes I let myself go."

"You mean with alcohol?"

"No, never," Luciel blurted. After his childhood, he had sworn to never let himself get drunk or high on sheer principle, "It's just that sometimes...with certain people...I find it's easier to smile."

(Y/N) turned around and shot the boy the most radiant grin he'd seen on anyone, "I hope I can be one of those people for you, Luciel."

"Really?" Luciel chuckled at (Y/N)'s innocence, "You barely even know me. I could be a serial killer, for all you know."

"You remind me of someone I once loved very much," (Y/N) said with a lost look in her eyes, "I can't imagine...that you're a bad person."

Luciel took a sharp breath in, noticing how close he was to (Y/N), still holding her bandaged wrist. "Who do I remind you of?" He whispered, not wanting to disturb the serenity of the moment.

"A man. MC said his name earlier," (Y/N) murmured, "Sa-...I mean, Ray."

Luciel recalled when MC had shouted the name in her fit of anger. _Scared that they'll leave you like Ray_ , her exact words were.

"Uh," Luciel said, scooting backward on the couch, suddenly aware of how close he had been to (Y/N). "Let's continue this question game later, (Y/N)."

The girl nodded her head, confused at Luciel's sudden change in demeanor, but accepting of it nonetheless.

"I'm going to catch up on some work, so, uh, I guess I'll see you in a couple hours?" Luciel winced at his words. He had never had the chance to be an awkwardly cringy teenager when it came to talking to pretty girls, especially given that he had never gone to formal school, but if he had ever seemed like one, it was at this moment. "V and Vanderwood will probably want to talk to you about the Mint Eye, so you might want to head to their room - first door on the right."

(Y/N) smiled, though, not noticing any significant change, "I will, thanks. Good luck with your work, Luciel. Let's talk more later."

Luciel merely nodded his head, trying to get as far from the situation as possible. The only women he had dealt with were MC and Jaehee, and neither of them had made his heart beat the way (Y/N) did. The redhead wasn't dumb, he was a hacker, a secret agent for the world's most secretive agency; he knew exactly what the cause of the butterflies in his stomach was.

 _I'll control myself better next time we speak_ , Luciel swore to himself, determined not to let himself risk everything for a reason stupid as a crush.

As Luciel walked out of the door, though, he couldn't suppress the goofy smile that spread across his lips. (Y/N) had told him that she hoped to become one of the people who made it easy for him to smile. Little did she know, she already was becoming that person to him, whether Luciel wanted her to be, or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 3.0k
> 
> Notes: I'm planning on baking cookies either tomorrow or the day after, and I'm super excited! My goal is to be able to make really good chocolate chip cookies, and I've baked four different batches so far. My last batch was semidecent so I'm hoping that this one will be (dare I say it?) actually good! I'll tell you guys how it goes :D
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/27/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	9. IX: Neutral Route (Y/N)

The only person who knew the whole truth was V.

Saeran, the dense boy too blind to see that he was the cause of your pain, doubtlessly had no idea why you'd chosen to leave the Mint Eye.

The Savior, for once in your whole life, had no way of knowing how you had escaped and why you'd helped Luciel and Vanderwood (though, you assumed she knew precisely why you'd escaped).

Even MC, who probably knew more of your situation than most, seemed confused as to why you were readily helping what V had called the 'RFA.'

Luciel had respected you too much during your questions game to ask anything that you might not have wanted to answer.

And Vanderwood had left as soon as you began telling V your story, utterly uninterested your past.

It was nice to tell everything to someone, to have a secondary input. V consoled you as you told him about your parents, the orphanage, being homeless. And he had sighed helplessly as you expressed the utter bliss you felt during the first years of yours and Saeran's friendship in the Mint Eye. He tried to pat your head awkwardly when you told him about your primary commitment, but even he withdrew as you explained how your secondary commitment had further scarred you.

He was perhaps the only person in the entire world to know just how heartbroken you had felt when Saeran began ignoring you for MC.

The words hurt, as they left your lips, but saying them aloud was like a reminder to yourself, that this was the life you had lived and the fate you'd resigned yourself to.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N)," V murmured, pinching the bridge of his nose. "The Mint Eye has truly scarred you. I can't believe Rika would go this far..."

"You mean the Savior?" You asked, intrigued. "You knew her?"

V nodded his head, leaning back into the chair he was sitting on, "Rika...yes. I loved her. The same way you must have loved Ray."

Oh.

Well, that was one thing V didn't know.

_His real name._

You refused to call him Saeran, the name too charged with emotion and pain for you to bring it past your lips anymore; and so you called him what everyone else at the Mint Eye did.

Ray.

The blue-haired man in front of you, though, seemed to raise his eyebrows every time you called your former best friend by that name.

It was almost as if he knew the truth.

Almost.

Before you could ponder the issue further, Vanderwood walked in, his mug of coffee refilled.

You raised your eyebrows. _How much coffee does this guy drink?_

"Is backstory time over?" He looked from you to V, self-concluding that it was. "Good. I have Luciel working in his room. He's trying to hack into the Mint Eye and access their camera feeds. Can you help him with that, (Y/N)?"

You nodded your head. "If I have a computer."

"Use one of Luciel's laptops. He always carries extra. And," Vanderwood grabbed your wrist before you were quite able to exit the room. "Be careful. I mean it."

You stared at Vanderwood, not quite sure what he meant, but the man was ushering you out of the room before you could ask any further questions.

You sighed, heading into what you hoped was Luciel's room, knocking softly at the door. "Can I come in?"

You heard a lock click, and the door opened, Luciel's confused form appearing instantly. "What are you doing here?"

"Vanderwood told me to see if I could help you. He said that you were trying to hack into the Mint Eye?" You glanced around the room, noting three different laptops open. "I worked with their software every day. My user might still be active."

Luciel laughed. "You really think they wouldn't have disabled your privileges?"

"There's only one other person who worked with me in that room and..." You let your voice trail off. "He might not have."

Luciel shot you a questioning look, curious to know more details but not pressing. "Ray," You murmured breathlessly, the single syllable answering all his questions.

You got to work quickly, managing to engross yourself in the world of code despite the uncomfortableness of your surroundings, the overly soft bed providing no support whatsoever for your back.

You glanced up at Luciel, momentarily shook as you saw not his features, but Saeran's. _They really do look similar_ , you thought, disturbed by the uncanny resemblance. Objectively speaking, they were quite different. Luciel's hair was red whilst Saeran's was white; Luciel's eyes flecked with gold, whereas Saeran projected a mint green glare.

But, you mused, you had only met Saeran after his secondary commitment, when his hair had been bleached white and his eye color altered. Who knows how similar he and Luciel may have looked before Saeran was changed? You remembered, with surprise, that a long time ago, the edges of Saeran's hair were reddish, a physical memory of what he had told you was a happier time for him.

Maybe that was his natural hair color?

You shook your head, pushing the thoughts from your mind and got back to work. No good would come from forming conspiracy theories in your mind.

 _Alright, Saeran hasn't deleted my user yet,_ You thought to yourself, smiling. Had the boy consciously left this end open for you? _No...he made it clear that he doesn't care about me anymore. So why....?_

You hesitated, before inputting your password. _This is too easy._

Your finger hovered over the 'Enter' key before you powered through and pressed it.

_Loading..._

_Loading..._

_Loading..._

You bit your lip, noting how the system was taking longer than usual to process your ID. "Luciel, I think I'm in," You whispered to the redhead, who immediately ceased his typing and came over to you, observing the 'Loading' screen with calculating eyes.

Those seconds where you didn't know what would follow were blissful ignorance, you realized later.

Gradually, you felt the laptop you were using become hot in your lap. Before long, the internal fans were whirring at what you could only assume was their maximum speed, the laptop making ungodly sounds.

You glanced at Luciel and then back at the laptop. It looked new enough; what kind of program was running in the background to cause this kind of response?

_Saeran!_

You realized with a start that, of course, it was his doing.

"Shit, shit, shit!" You mumbled, frantically trying to close the program, stop Saeran from hacking into your laptop. Your former friend must have been on standby, waiting for what he knew would be your first attempt in.

You slammed your finger on the power button, but the keyboard controls were locked—no matter how hard you pressed, it was rendered useless. The screen blanked, temporarily, then glitched into an audio file. _No...this isn't a prerecorded audio clip. It's a live connection!_

"Ah~" A voice cooed from inside your laptop, the sound distorted with a voice changer placed over it. Even with the filter, though, you'd recognize that inflection anywhere. "There you are, my sweet princess."

You winced at the nickname.

Saeran had only ever used it lovingly, as he'd gaze down at you with a soft smile on his lips while preparing to kiss your cheek.

The mocking tone in his voice made you cringe, a piece of your already broken heart further shattering.

"Sae-" You began, trying to reason with the person you once knew so well.

"Don't call me that!" The voice shrieked, stopping you. "I've...I've come to give you a warning, (Y/N). I know you're working with that...that liar."

"Who?" You asked, fingers no longer flying across the keyboard as you halted all motion to talk to Saeran for the first time in weeks.

"Don't interrupt me!" Saeran shrieked, evidently unstable. "I know how you stole MC from me, how _that liar_ is sitting with you _right now._ "

Only then did you notice the red blinking light beside the camera on the laptop, but Luciel responded before you did, his arm darting around your body to cover the laptop camera with his thumb. "Who are you?" He demanded, voice hard.

"You should know that, shouldn't you?"

You bit your lip. Saeran wasn't acting normal. Hell, he hadn't been normal for almost a month, but this was too much. He was acting psychotic. Crazy, even.

He wasn't _him_ anymore.

"Anyway," Saeran began again, "I've come to give you a warning, (Y/N). If you ever set foot in the Mint Eye again, we will _ruin_ you. Did you think taking the Elixirs was bad? That what happened to your eyes could even _begin_ to compare to true pain? Don't return, (Y/N)." Saeran threatened, "But if you keep working with that _traitor_ , we'll have no choice but to hunt you down and bring the Mint Eye to you."

For a moment, the room was quiet, the only audible sound being your shaky breath.

"May we never see each other again, princess," Saeran cooed, before the laptop let out a burst of electricity and shut down. You shrieked at the pulsation of heat, pushing the device from your lap and onto the bed where you cradled your stinging things.

"Who...was that?" Luciel whispered, his arm no longer around you as he turned to meet your eyes.

"Ray," You whispered, trying not to cry.

But the tears had already begun flowing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.7k
> 
> Notes: This story takes a couple turns over the next few chapters (I'm excited to see what you guys think of the developments in chapter 10! :D) and I'll be honest - things may get dark here and there. I want to know what you guys think of that, since I, personally, love the deranged interpretations of Saeyoung and Saeran. I feel like both characters are so multi-dimensional, and that Cheritz really only showed us the insane side of Saeran, rather than Saeyoung - but what if the circumstances were even more fucked up? I'm currently drafting out another Saeran x reader x Saeyoung and it's 10x darker than what's in here...but the plot moves faster, and reader-chan will be with both brothers, at the same time, from the very beginning. (But it will be have mature/explicit themes) Are you interested in reading something like that? Drop me a message and tell me what you think :) (Btw if anyone was wondering, my cookies from last week were a hot mess xD they don't even taste that bad, but they're super hard and crunchy so :/)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 1/30/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	10. X: Neutral Route (Luciel)

Luciel tried to comfort (Y/N), tell her that everything would be okay, but the devastated look in her eye left the redhead at a loss for words. _That was Ray?_ He thought in disbelief. _That person was mental! He spoke like a psychopath!_

In seconds, though, (Y/N) had pushed her way past Luciel and was speed-walking out of the door. From her shaking shoulders, Luciel noted with sympathy, she was crying.

He felt sorry for the girl. He knew himself how hard it was to abandon people you love; he couldn't begin to imagine the pain she must have felt as that 'Ray' person spoke to her with so much hate.

 _If Saeran ended up hating me the way Ray seems to hate her_ , Luciel thought, _I don't think I'd be able to handle it_.

Luciel shook his head, sighing at the situation. He glanced at the laptop on the bed. From the way the machine sizzled and popped earlier, the redhead knew that Ray had managed to overwork the device and fry its insides in that terrifying 'pop' he heard earlier. _The laptop was on (Y/N)'s lap_ , Luciel realized _, Her legs must be in a world of pain right now_.

Work could wait. Following (Y/N) out the door, he didn't need to see her to know where she had gone.

"Hey," He called, pushing open the door to the cabin, his eyes scanning the ground before settling on a blob of white and magenta on the ground, a little off in the distance.

(Y/N) didn't respond or acknowledge him, but Luciel climbed down the steps and joined her regardless. "You, uh," Luciel scratched the back of his head, "Want to talk about it?"

Yet again, the boy was met with silence, but Luciel was relentless. He wouldn't give up. "That's okay. We can talk about something else." The boy looked down and thought for a moment. What could he say that wouldn't further hurt you? "How about that questions game we played earlier? I think it's your turn. Ask me anything, (Y/N), I'll answer it."

Yet again, (Y/N) was silent. It was a different kind of silence, though. She was thinking.

"How...." Luciel's ears perked up, relieved to hear her voice. "How did you know I'd be out here?"

Luciel chuckled. "Although we're wedging five people into that cabin, it's really only meant for three. There aren't many places you can really go, not with the Mint Eye lurking in these same forests."

"Oh."

A temporary silence followed while Luciel tried to think of an innocent question to ask that wouldn't stir up any emotions or memories. He was careful. He didn't want to accidentally hurt (Y/N). "Uh, what's your favorite food? There aren't many ingredients up here, but I'm a decent chef if I try."

"I haven't had food in years. The Mint Eye gives people a diet of pills and elixirs. What about you?"

"When I'm not on a mission, my diet's mostly chips and sodas."

"That can't be healthy for you," (Y/N) giggled, a small sign that she wasn't thinking about Ray as much.

Luciel grinned, her smile like a victory lap for him. "Still, you haven't answered my question. I'm sure you've had _something_ you liked from before you joined that cult."

"It's not a cult..." (Y/N) sighed, pausing her words. "My orphanage used to give cookies to the well-behaved kids. I had a couple...they were really delicious. I've always wanted to try them again."

Luciel smiled, relieved.

Back when he still looked after Saeran, his little brother would crave cookies and other sugary treats nearly every day. Luciel had spent months mastering the technique behind baking the perfect chocolate chip (alongside a dozen other sweet treats). He hadn't honed his skills in nearly a decade, but he was confident he could give (Y/N) the best cookies of her lifetime.

"My turn," (Y/N) said, before continuing, "Is that your natural hair color?"

Luciel chuckled, "Yeah. It's nice, isn't it? How about yours?"

"I had it bleached at the Mint Eye. I think my hair used to be (h/c)...honestly, I can barely remember what I used to look like." (Y/N) trailed off, her eyes distant once more. "I'd say I looked better before the bleaching."

"It's hard to imagine you getting any prettier than this," Luciel blurted, not realizing how embarrassing his words were until they were delivered.

"Thanks,"(Y/N) murmured, a pink blush spread across her cheeks. "Now it's my turn. Tell me, did you always know you wanted to be a hacker? That you wanted to work with computers?"

Luciel's smile dropped from his face, remembering how different he was from his childhood self. "When I was young, I wanted to be the perfect gentleman. A knight in shining armor for every person who crossed my path. I called myself the defender of justice."

(Y/N) turned her head to him, "And now?"

Luciel chuckled mirthlessly. "I'm a hacker. I'm one of the bad guys. You can hardly call me a defender of justice, with all the sins I've committed." Luciel glanced down at his neck, where a silver cross had hung for almost as long as he'd lived. "I'm okay with going to hell, though. Even if I didn't get to meet my dream of being a protector for _everyone_ , I at least know that the one person I care about most is safe."

"Who?" (Y/N) whispered.

Luciel hesitated. Should he tell her about his Saeran? How he had given his little brother to Rika so she could protect him when Luciel couldn't?

"It's..." Luciel trailed off. "Not your turn." He stuck his tongue out at (Y/N), laughing at her exasperated expression.

"I swear, Luciel, you're impossible." (Y/N) rolled her eyes. "Come on, let's go inside. It's colder than I had thought."

"You're obviously going to be cold if you wear a dress like that," Luciel murmured, gesturing toward the sleeveless, backless fabric that did a poor job of insulating the body.

"It's not like I had anything else to wear," (Y/N) laughed, picking up her dress as she climbed up the steps to the cabin. "And hey, I _did_ bring a robe with me."

Luciel rolled his eyes, pulling the door open for her, "Yeah, and then you fell from forty feet into a bush. Very ladylike."

(Y/N) laughed, flicking the redhead on the cheek, feigning offense, "You said you wanted to be a gentleman, right? Well, a real gentleman would have offered me his coat, wouldn't he?"

Luciel rolled his eyes, closing the door behind the two of them as they both paused and basked in the heat of the cabin. "Will that jacket still be necessary? Or is this fireplace enough?"

"The fireplace, thank you very much." (Y/N) stated, holding her head up high and acting overly snooty before bursting into a fit of giggles, unable to hold the facade, even jokingly, for more than five seconds.

Luciel grinned at (Y/N), pulling her onto the couch by the fireplace where the two of them laid still, relaxing on the surprisingly comfortable material. "I don't think I ever apologized for how I treated you back at the Mint Eye," Luciel said, thinking out loud.

"No need to apologize," (Y/N) smiled, pulling her body up to make eye contact with him. "If I were in your position, I don't think I'd have trusted me, either."

Luciel chuckled, yet again pleasantly surprised at how selflessly understanding (Y/N) proved herself to be. "If you stay so considerate of everyone, people will walk all over you."

"Luciel, less than twenty-four hours ago, I was one of the Savior's council members at the Mint Eye, of all places. I've already been walked all over."

(Y/N)'s words were blunt, blurted in a moment of honesty, spoken without any expectation of sympathy or attention. Perhaps that was why Luciel found himself so torn as she said them.

"That's not fair..." He said, more to himself than to her. "You're too good for this world, (Y/N)."

For what felt like the first time, Luciel looked into (Y/N)'s eyes, and she looked back into his, the two studying each other without exchanging words. In the periphery of his vision, Luciel noticed how soft her hair looked, and how well her body fit into her purple dress.

"One last question for our game," Luciel whispered, bringing a hand to (Y/N)'s cheek, savoring the sensation of her soft skin against his fingertips.

He felt an overwhelming desire to kiss her.

"May I...?"

Even if he didn't finish the sentence, there wasn't a single doubt in his mind that (Y/N) understood his question. And his words were sincere. He wouldn't move an inch forward until the snowy-haired beauty in front of him explicitly told him he could. 

It felt like an eternity before she responded.

"Yes," She whispered, and then the space between their lips disappeared entirely.

The first moment was sweet. It was gentle and tender as Luciel kept his touch light against (Y/N)'s lips. As soon as they broke for air, though, they both returned to each other, hungry for more. The kisses turned rough and passionate, fervent with desire for each other.

Luciel pulled (Y/N) onto him, so that the girl was straddling him with her legs on either side of his lap as she sat in it, Luciel softly angling her head downward to further indulge himself in the sweetness he found inside her mouth.

His hands trailed down from her neck to the base of her back, fingers deftly flying over where he knew her body was cut from treating her wounds earlier. He settled one hand on (Y/N)'s waist and the other on her thigh, pressing her body into his as much as possible as he finally allowed himself to stop resisting and take what he wanted to make _his_ so bad.

Luciel flipped her around so that (Y/N) laid down with her back pressed to the couch with Luciel was on top of her, hungrily staring down at the girl before attacking her lips once more. He left a trail of kisses down from her lips to her ear where he sucked on the tender flesh, (Y/N)'s quiet moans only further edging him on as he moved to barrage her neck with kisses and licks, searching for that one weak spot.

"L-Luciel!"

 _Found it_ , Luciel grinned to himself before flooding the spot with sensation, biting and sucking and nibbling until the skin looked raw.

He pushed a handful of white hair out of the way, admiring how soft it was for a moment before continuing to mark (Y/N)'s neck. Barely a few seconds had passed before (Y/N) was wrapping her arms around his neck and moaning Luciel's name out, the syllables never having sounded more seductive than as they rolled off her tongue.

Luciel let himself be pulled into another sensual kiss as (Y/N) tugged his head down toward her, her long fingers tangling themselves in his hair.

Their shared passion was intense, a session of heat and intimacy that they had both been deprived of their whole lives, but it was cut short.

"You fucking idiots!"

Begrudgingly, Luciel pulled himself off of (Y/N) to glare at Vanderwood, who had not wasted a single moment in grabbing him by the collar and pushing the redhead against the wall.

"Woah, woah, woah, boss," Luciel joked, the situation before him utterly unintimidating, "I know I'm attractive, but if you wanted to make a move on me, you really should have done it before I sta-"

"I told you _not to fuck around_ with her!" Vanderwood shouted, pushing Luciel further up against the wall.

Luciel frowned, now mildly uncomfortable as Vanderwood tightened his grip around his neck. "Why should you care? The mission was completed, it's over. It doesn't matter what I do now!"

Vanderwood growled, further angered by Luciel's words. "No! I gave you an order, and you were supposed to follow it! If I were anyone else in this goddamn agency, _I would have killed you for directly disobeying me!_ I'm your handler, not your babysitter—you should be heeding my every command!"

"Slow your roll there, boss," Luciel chuckled, "You sound kinky."

The brunette man groaned, utterly frustrated with Luciel and his utter inability to take anything Vanderwood said seriously.

"What's really the issue here, Vanderwood?" (Y/N) asked, her voice hesitant.

Vanderwood didn't respond, the scowl on his face unmoving. "Luciel, go to V's room."

"Why should I-" Luciel began, only to be interrupted.

"Just go!" Vanderwood hissed, turning to (Y/N). "You, stay with me."

Luciel glanced at (Y/N) hesitantly, slightly worried for the girl's well being. Luciel knew _he_ could handle Vanderwood (especially a pissed off Vanderwood), but others weren't as skilled in the art of manipulation.

Then again, Luciel knew the stubborn look in Vanderwood's eyes all too well. His boss wouldn't be leaving any time soon. "Fine." Luciel offered a sympathetic glance toward (Y/N), mouthing 'good luck' as he headed to V.

He hadn't even closed the door when the blue-haired man spoke, "Luciel, there's something you need to know."

Luciel arched an eyebrow. V was a serious person, especially with MC being captured and then having to be rescued from the Mint Eye, but his tone was more than that. 

Pressing. Grave. Fearful?

"You'll want to be sitting for this," V said, but Luciel made no motion to do so. "Alright, then. I was just speaking to (Y/N), maybe half an hour ago...and she told me about the Mint Eye. Specifically, the people in the Mint Eye."

"And?" Luciel asked, bracing himself for the worst. But even that wouldn't be enough to prepare him for V's next words.

"Luciel, we've found your brother."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.3k
> 
> Notes: Aahahhh I'm sorry for being late in updating >.> I took a nap yesterday when I was exhausted, and I'd planned to wake up and publish this but then I slept through all my alarms. My bad!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 2/03/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	11. XI: Neutral Route (Y/N)

You stared at Vanderwood, the situation more tense than it was awkward. "So..." You began, trying to start some sort of conversation.

"What?" Vanderwood snapped, crossing his arms. The scowl still hadn't left his face.

"I still don't get what I did that was so wrong." You blurted the words, pouting almost like a child. You were being honest, though. Yeah, maybe it wasn't the best idea to make out with a guy you'd only met while escaping a cult for the insane, but it shouldn't have been this much of an issue, right?

Vanderwood turned to you and stared, his eyes fully absorbing every detail. Almost as if you were under the Savior's sharp gaze, you felt him see the story behind every scar that ever broke your (s/c) skin. It was as if he didn't need you to tell him your backstory to know precisely what you'd been through. "V told me..." He began before trailing off, hesitant.

He sighed before turning away from you. Avoiding your eyes, he hesitantly poured himself another mug of coffee. _Third cup of the day_ , you thought, before he offered it to you, much to your surprise.

"V told me about Ray," The man murmured as you took the mug. "You think it's a good idea to play with Luciel's feelings while you're still in love with someone else?"

You were taken aback, forced to consider Vanderwood's words. Were you still in love with Saeran? _No,_ you thought, shaking your head, _It's not possible. I can't still love him. How can I love someone who obviously never cared for me?_

"That's not even it, though. It's not like you went after V or me, you chose Luciel. The one guy here who physically resembles your ex."

"Ray's not my ex," you blurted.

"That's what you choose to disagree with me on?" Vanderwood snorted. "So you agree that you only kissed Luciel because he reminded you of 'Ray?'"

"No!" You said, trying to sort out your feelings. Luciel was sweet. He comforted you. That was why you had kissed him. "I-I didn't even kiss him first."

Vanderwood scoffed. "What, you expect to wander around this cabin dressed in a dress like _that_ ," Vanderwood gestured wildly at the satin fabric wrapped around your body, "Without getting any attention?"

Now it was your turn to scowl. "I'm wearing this because I don't have any other clothes. It's not my fault if you guys can't control yourselves. I _did_ bring a robe with me."

"Fine. Admit that you only messed around with Luciel because of Ray. That's all I want to hear."

"I didn't!"

"You did."

"No, I didn't!"

"Yes, you did."

"I didn't!"

_"You bitch!"_

You and Vanderwood turned your heads to see Luciel charging at you, barely held back by V, the blob of red getting closer and closer until he had you tackled you against the wall.

"Luciel, control yourself!" Vanderwood spat, trying to pull the boy off of you, but only managing to disgruntle him.

"You _knew!"_ Luciel shouted, furious. "You knew who he really was! Why the fuck would you go around calling him 'Ray?!' Was that just something to mess with the rest of us while we struggled to figure the truth out?!"

You were at a total loss for words, utterly confused about what Luciel was talking about.

"Luciel, please, we don't know what she knows and what she doesn't know. I was in the Mint Eye for a brief time, and Saeran _did_ call himself Ray-"

You turned your head to V, shocked. "You know his real name?!"

This only angered Luciel. "See, V? This bitch isn't as innocent as you thought. Why the fuck would you hide this from us? Are you even _on_ our side?! We should give you back to the Mint Eye, you goddamn wench!

"What's going on here?" Everyone turned their heads to face a sleepy MC, whose face immediately turned into a smirk when she saw the picture before her.

"Nothing, MC, please return to bed-" V tried to tell her, but his voice was overshadowed by Vanderwood.

"Luciel got attached to a girl. His fault. Women always lie." Vanderwood said bluntly, still trying to pull Luciel off your neck.

In the midst of all the arguing and fighting and commentary in this sea of noise, one voice caught your attention.

"This bitch knew Saeran was my brother and kept it from me!" Luciel shouted.

 _That_ shook you.

"S...Saeran is..." You whispered, unsure if Luciel had even heard your voice. "Your brother?"

You felt blood rush to your head, a sudden wave of dizziness overcoming you.

 _Saeran,_ A voice inside your head whispered, _It's always Saeran. You can never get away from him, (Y/N)._

"Stop it," You whispered to the voice inside your head, but Luciel thought you were talking to him. He immediately released you, practically throwing you to the ground where you laid there, clutching your head.

"Anyone who ever loved you was wrong." The redhead said, glaring down at you. Luciel's eyes were cold, golden like the sun, which brought forth so much happiness and life but now seemed to be killing you where you laid. You couldn't come up with any response, half of you believing it was true.

"I didn't know, Luciel." You murmured.

Would he believe you, though?

"Save your lies. You'll need them when we return you to the Mint Eye. If I see you for another fucking second, I think I'll kill you." He walked off, leaving the words to replay in your mind on loop.

MC laughed at the scene before her. "I told you we shouldn't have brought her back."

"MC, don't..." V started, trying to diffuse the situation, but trailed off when he realized that he had no point to make.

You took a sharp breath, clearing your head. It was true. Ever since you laid eyes on him, Luciel had been familiar to you. He had reminded you of Saeran, during a happier time. Was that why you were so attached to him?

You bit your lip.

You'd know Luciel all of eight hours, and he already hated you as much as Saeran.

 _Anyone who ever loved you was wrong,_ Luciel had told you.

The boy was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.1k
> 
> Notes: I think it's worth noting that I, as a reader/player of Mystic Messenger, interpreted the characters of Saeran and Saeyoung to be darker than how Cheritz presented them. I feel like Cheritz offered us this concept of two brothers who do indeed share love for one another (however morphed and twisted it had become) and then took a rather positive approach to the story. But if we're dealing with that concept alone, I feel like things could have gotten very dark in how they'd reunite, and the extremes that Saeyoung and Saeran would go to fulfill their personal desires. I'm saying this to give you guys some insight into why this story may seem to get dark at times. The way Saeyoung and Saeran are acting is not okay, and I'm consciously writing them both to be a little fucked up in the mind. Sorry for the long note!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 2/06/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	12. XII: Neutral Route (Rika)

The world had grown cruel.

That was the one truth Rika knew to be absolute. Decades ago, it was a different place. The sky was bluer, the grass greener, the people happier.

But the twenty-first century was an era of purpose. Life was dedicated to work and advancement, where people couldn't be troubled with matters trifling as joy.

The Mint Eye was a safe haven from the cruelty of the outside world.

Closed off in the depths of a forest, where the sky couldn't be seen, and the only sign of natural life was the flower garden inside, the people of the Mint Eye could revisit a simpler time—one free from the chains of responsibility that shackled those outside. They lived in peace, wholly content with leading a life devoted to harmony and happiness.

A life devoted to magenta.

Rika had chosen the color carefully; she was acutely aware of its rarity in nature, and that was what made it such an admirable choice. The Mint Eye was everything the world was not. A shelter from time itself, it was too perfect to be natural.

It was mint.

It was magenta.

 _And yet, (Y/N) has chosen to leave my protection,_ Rika thought bitterly. _How ungrateful._

A part of Rika had known that the other girl, MC, would be gone as fast as she had arrived. That was why she had opted not to waste time throwing the brunette into primary and secondary commitment. (Y/N)'s escape was entirely unexpected, though.

 _Was she that devastated when Saeran chose MC over her?_ Rika considered the notion with care. The blonde knew that she had played a critical role in separating the two. Then again, Rika didn't truly consider (Y/N) worthy of Saeran's affections. A woman like MC, someone who came from a respectable background rather than an orphanage and then the streets, was much more fitting for the delicate boy.

It had taken significant work to separate the two, but Saeran had finally given in to what Rika had tried so hard to make obvious. He chose MC. MC over (Y/N).

Rika sighed as she looked at the clock.

Saeran should be there any moment now for their meeting.

Though, with the absence of (Y/N), the boy was growing increasingly unpredictable. Rika had found herself with no other choice but to swap out his usual pills for those soaked in the Elixir. It wasn't enough of a dosage to cause any pain, but it should have been sufficient in keeping Saeran in line when (Y/N) wouldn't do it for him.

Rika glanced down at her nails. Perfectly trimmed and painted, as usual. _If V were here, he would have me pose._

Rika frowned at the memory of the man. V had left the Mint Eye without a word, abandoning the young woman and breaking her heart in turn. Yet still, she found herself remembering him and his habits, remembering what he would say at certain things, his old actions seeping into her subconscious to produce thoughts she never authorized.

A knock on the door pulled Rika from her mind.

She straightened her dress, making sure she looked as prophetic as the Savior of the Mint Eye should. After a moment, she called out, "Come in, Ray."

The white-haired boy entered and closed the door behind him, seating himself on the Victorian-style couch he always took. Usually, in Rika's sessions with him, he would immediately begin talking. Something (Y/N) this, (Y/N) that. In truth, if it weren't for Saeran, Rika wouldn't have paid the girl any extra attention. For the past month and a half, though, Saeran had grown quiet.

As he sat across from Rika, for the first time, he said nothing at all, his expression dead.

Rika coughed.

"Do you not have anything noteworthy to report to the Savior, Ray?" Rika kept her tone was calm and inviting as she spoke, making sure she hid her irritance behind a facade of serenity.

"No." Saeran's face was sullen, his expression somehow even darker than it had been when Rika had first been told to take him in.

The blonde sighed, picking herself up off the couch to join Saeran on his, wrapping him into a delicate hug, genuinely trying to comfort him. "Ray," Rika murmured when the boy didn't respond, still staring numbly ahead. "Ray, look at me."

Rika sighed.

"Ray."

No response.

"Ray!"

The boy raised his eyebrows, but said nothing.

Rika took a breath.

"Saeran."

That seemed to shake him. The white-haired boy turned to face Rika, his eyes no longer empty but instead sorrowful, searching for something he couldn't find in Rika's emerald eyes.

Rika turned her head away. After all her years with Saeran in the Mint Eye, she still struggled to meet his gaze when he had that expression on his face. The boy feared her, she knew. After all the pain she had forced him to endure as she tested out Elixir after Elixir on his broken body, he _should_ fear her.

But their history together was too great, too sorrowful, for her to look Saeran in the eyes and lie to him. But the truth could never come out. She had sworn it. And that was one of the few promises she intended to keep. 

_Saeyoung's eyes had never looked so determined._

_"I know you heard me, Rika."_

_"B-but that's too much of a r-responsibility for me! I can't take care of another human being altogether!"_ _Rika's words were short, the young girl stuttering through the shock. She was twelve. Too young and naive to do what Saeyoung was asking of her._

_"You can do it better than me." Saeyoung's lips were set in a hard line, his eyes fierce and golden. They had the same determined glint to them that a king's crown does as he gives an order of utmost importance. "Take care of Saeran for me, Rika. I can't..."_

_Saeyoung took a breath, pausing before he could grow too emotional. "I can't stand by and watch him grow up in a household like mine. Things are about to get fucked up. Really fucked up. Saeran should at least be safe. You have to promise me that you'll keep him safe."_

_Rika swallowed, turning to gaze at V. The elder boy had always been a voice of reason in her life. He was the one she turned to whenever she hesitated, his advice always working out for the better. "Rika...I know this is difficult to hear," V murmured softly, pushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear, a loving little gesture established early on in their childhood friendship, "But Saeyoung is right. He's ready to handle what he's about to do...but he can't do it until Saeran is out of the picture. Safe. Only you can offer that kind of shelter."_

_Rika hesitated, her lip trembling. This wasn't a normal conversation between them. It wasn't a friendly banter with her and V on one side, arguing with Saeyoung and Jumin whilst Saeran watched from afar, sighing. This was important. This was real. This was the future of a human life they were discussing._

_"What he's about to do?' Wh-what do you mean, V? What are you going to do, Saeyoung?" Rika's question was innocent enough, but the redhead couldn't meet her eyes as she asked it._

_"Saeyoung," She whispered, serious. "What are you going to do?"_

_Saeyoung looked away, stubborn as usual. That was one thing Rika hated about him—he was thick-headed when it came to situations like the one before them, never willing to rely on others unless it was absolutely necessary. "You...you really need me to do this for you, don't you?" Rika mumbled, coming to terms with the situation before her._

_Saeyoung nodded, still not meeting her eyes._

_"...Okay, I promise. I'll take Saeran in and keep him safe. But, Saeyoung, you know what he's like. If he thinks you abandoned him, then he'll never forgi_ — _"_

_"Let him think I abandoned him," Saeyoung said, interrupting her. "After I do this, he's better off without me."_

_Rika bit her lip._

_"What are you going to do?" She turned to V after receiving no response. "Well, V? What could Saeyoung do that's so horrible he doesn't think he's fit to be around his own brother?!"_

_Even V turned away, mumbling a soft, "It's not my place to say," before backing away._

_Rika sighed, a trigger for many more exhales of frustration that would be brought forth by her decision to take Saeran under her wing._

_It was worth it, though._

And nearly half a decade later, it still was.

Though for a very different reason.

Rika hadn't expected to form the Mint Eye. She hadn't planned to become the Savior of the broken, bringing salvation to the world one lost soul at a time. But without Saeran, that unexpected future wouldn't have been possible. If not for his acceptance of her idea, and his decision to become Ray, none of her dreams would have been brought to reality.

She had spent nearly half a decade manipulating the boy, but she still did care for him.

"Saeran..." Rika murmured again, pulling back from the embrace. "What can I do to ease your pain, my sweetling?"

She looked at Saeran with motherly eyes. Ever since she assumed the role as his caretaker, even though she was scarcely two years older than him, she had looked after him like the proper mother he never had. Rika felt the connection as well. She found her heart breaking with his, rising with his, beating quicker with his. Even when V had left, utterly shattering Rika's heart, she had still found it sadder when MC had chosen to leave Saeran—she knew what heartbreak felt like, and she hated that Saeran had to go through it as well. "What will make you smile again, my sweet Saeran?"

Saeran opened his mouth to speak, but the sound that came forth seemed inhuman. It was a desperate groan, but whether it was a sound of distress or pain or fear was something Rika could not tell.

"Speak to me, sweetling," Rika cooed, her words gentle as the fingers she stroked Saeran's hair with.

"I...I want..." Saeran was hesitant, tears beginning to form in his eyes.

"Yes?" Rika encouraged, trying to hear what Saeran wanted. She truly did care for the boy. Whatever he wanted, whatever he needed, would be his.

"(Y/N)." He said, his voice soft enough to have been carried away by the gentle breeze brought in by the open window. "I want...(Y/N)."

Rika felt her stomach coil.

So hard.

She had worked _so fucking hard_ to get (Y/N) out of Saeran's head. Why couldn't the boy realize that MC was better suited for him? That (Y/N) was just a pathetic girl from the streets, a leech on the Mint Eye? The girl was undeserving of magenta and undeserving of Saeran, but the boy's heart kept going back to her.

"You don't want MC?" Rika asked cautiously, choosing her words with care.

"I never wanted MC," Saeran mumbled, throwing his head into his hands, "It was (Y/N). It was always (Y/N). And I screwed it up with her so bad, Savior. So bad."

Rika felt her eyes narrow.

"What did you do, Saeran?"

The boy hesitated, but Rika didn't say another word. She knew the truth was eating him up inside, it was only a matter of how long he could hold out. "I..." Saeran hesitated, but Rika was more patient than he was cautious.

"I spoke to her," He mumbled. "She tried to access the Mint Eye's primary database, and so I hacked into the laptop she was using. And I talked to her. And I said such horrible things...I don't know what came over me, Savior!"

Rika's eyes widened. _Could it be that the Elixir is having an effect on how he treats (Y/N)?_ Rika paused for a moment, the notion seeming more and more reasonable with every passing second. _Yes...the Elixir instills self-destructive instincts into the mind. It must have manifested itself in Saeran's mind to ruin his relationship with the one girl that, for some stupid reason, he seems to love. No wonder! He was on the Elixir ever since MC joined the Mint Eye...yes, that's why his relationship deteriorated so quickly with (Y/N)! This is perfect!_

Rika smirked.

MC was the woman Saeran was destined to be with. It was the girl Rika had chosen for him, and he _would_ fall in love with her, whether he liked it or not.

And it seemed that Rika just realized how.

"Saeran, my sweetling," She murmured, her voice tender. "Would you like to see (Y/N) again? I can make it happen."

Saeran's ears perked up, his entire expression clearing like the clouds after a particularly destructive thunderstorm. "You can? Really, Savior? Oh, thank you so much!"

Rika smiled at Saeran, sweet as ever.

The boy wouldn't understand her reasoning. But MC was his destiny. Rika had decided as much, and as the Savior, her wish was law in the Mint Eye.

Rika made a mental note to double Saeran's medication orders; she'd sneak the Elixir back into his diet until the poor fool had convinced himself once more that he wasn't worthy of (Y/N), that he was in love with MC. Then, when the two met, she would allow the Elixir to deliver the final blow to their relationship, crushing it forever.

Then, even if Saeran realized the truth and tried to go back to (Y/N), it would be too late.

Whether he liked it or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.3k
> 
> Notes: February is going to be a busy month for me T^T So much for my New Year's Resolution of maintaining a good sleep schedule
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 02/10/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	13. XIII: Neutral Route (Y/N)

Your parents had always called you names.

Useless. Pathetic. Ugly.

The kids at your orphanage hadn't been much better, distancing themselves from you and wondering why you were so weird, whispering insults behind your back.

Only two people from the Mint Eye had ever called you beautiful, and that included a bipolar man who had made it clear that he now hated you, and a manipulative woman who made it her life's purpose to destroy happiness (though, of course, she thought she was spreading it).

On the rare occasions that you _had_ looked into the mirror and considered yourself to be particularly stunning, you had always thought that it was the form-fitting dresses that the Savior had given you that did the trick.

As you stared at yourself in the mirror, dressed in Vanderwood's cargo pants and a tank top he had stolen from god knows where, you noted, with mild amusement, that you truly were pretty. You stared at your face, still not used to the white locks that framed your face and the mint green eyes that stared back at you, but the lack of any magenta clothing articles was a pleasant change.

You took a step back before walking out of the room. "What should I do with this dress?" You asked Vanderwood, who had been waiting at the door while you changed.

"Give it to me. I'll burn it."

You raised an eyebrow, but handed the clothing over nonetheless.

"What? Don't you want to forget about the Mint Eye?" Vanderwood's question made sense, but...

"Kind of hard to forget about the Mint Eye when it stares back at me every time I look in the mirror." Your words weren't laced with anger or venom, a simple truth that you would eventually need to accept.

Vanderwood still looked slightly apologetic, though. "Oh. Right. Well, you can't forget about the Mint Eye either way. You still need to help hack into...what did you call it? The defense room? Perimeter?"

"Security room," You told Vanderwood, but hesitating. "Are you sure Luciel will even let me use his laptops anymore? I doubt he wants to see me right now..."

Vanderwood chuckled. 

"Luciel usually isn't as unprofessional as you saw him act this morning. He'll be able to handle it. The only reason he let his emotions get the better of him was because he let his emotions loose around you." The man paused, rolling his eyes. "Kissing is stupid. Either have sex or don't, but there's no benefit to making out on a couch."

You blushed, pulling your eyes away from the brunette in front of you. You didn't refute his claim of kissing being stupid, not wanting to admit that you, too, had been emotionally invested when you kissed Luciel.

It was your first kiss, after all.

_It's not like you knew that Saeran had claimed your lips once before._

"Though I guess your situation was a little different," Vanderwood said, pausing thoughtfully for a moment. You thought he was being kind until he continued, "Given that you kissed Luciel because you'd always wanted to kiss his brother, and he was the second-best thing."

"That's not true!" You blurted, resenting the idea that he thought you had only kissed Luciel because of your prior feelings for Saeran. "Saeran and I were never like that..."

"Oh?" Vanderwood said, taking a step closer to you. Resisting the urge to back up further against the wall, you stared up at the man, not letting yourself be intimidated by him. "So you're saying that if I had happened to be there instead of Luciel...you would be fucking me right now?"

Vanderwood whispered the last part in your ear, his body close enough for you to smell the cologne he had sprayed on his suit. You felt his hot breath on your ear, tickling your neck as he continued.

"Because I could go right now, darling."

Vanderwood practically purred the words into your ear before he took an abrupt step back. "See, I told you." He smirked. "It's specifically Luciel you're attracted to. And you can't tell me he doesn't resemble his twin brother."

You swallowed, still flustered from the previous moment.

"Go, Luciel will need your help hacking in. He won't admit it, but by being there, you're making everyone's lives easier."

Vanderwood shooed you away, probably so that he could go get another cup full of coffee, and you mentally prepared yourself for a barrage of insults before stepping into Luciel's room.

It was still dark, but the short-circuited laptop had been discarded in the corner of the room, replaced by another, slightly older model.

"Use that computer." Was all Luciel said to you, not even glancing upward as you awkwardly shifted your weight onto the sagging bed, reentering the world of code.

You tried your hardest to ignore Luciel's presence, to ignore the sheer fury he managed to convey in his keystrokes alone. You wanted to apologize one more time, tell him you honestly didn't know that he was Saeran's brother, that you didn't know he didn't realize Saeran was alive, that you never meant to mislead him.

But you didn't.

You focused on the laptop in front of you, staring at code until you and it were one. Your thoughts were in binary when you abruptly stopped, seeing something interesting.

Saeran had stripped your user from all administrative privileges. Even if you were able to sign in, all you'd be able to view was a series of file folders titled _'Classified.'_ Saeran, on the other hand, had his user still up and running.

Your fingers stopped, staring at the screen before you.

There was no need to hack your way in if you had the password. Hacking was like breaking a window to get into someone else's house, or shimmying in through the dog door; but the password was the key to the main entrance.

If you had the password, all your troubles would be solved instantly.

_"My password is always the most important person in my life."_

Saeran had told you that long ago.

Very long ago.

So long ago, that it may not even be true anymore.

You still found yourself pulled toward the screen, though.

You knew, from your time in the Security Room, that you had three attempts to type in the password before the system would auto-lock you out, the only way back in via a physical override at the Mint Eye itself.

There was no need for three full tries, though.

You only needed one.

You flicked your eyes up, for the first time, and gazed at Luciel as he worked. Still engrossed, he was typing away, likely trying something much more reasonable than the far-fetched idea in your head.

You typed the characters slowly, staring at your fingers the whole time and double-checking to ensure that there were no mistakes. _(Y/N)._

You'd spelled your name a thousand times before, filling out various forms, sending texts. None of those instances compared to the swell of adrenaline you felt as you typed the characters that made up your name. Were you still the most important person in Saeran's life?

It was a longshot. A very long longshot. But, still, you knew you wouldn't be able to sleep unless you tried.

Your finger hovered over the 'Enter' key, and you had almost summoned the courage to press the button, when an image flashed through your mind.

It was the day you'd been released from your Secondary Commitment. The moment when you'd been in front of the great wooden door that served to separate you and the other council members.

At that moment, you still had hope. You thought that you were Saeran's number one, and that as soon as the door opened, things would immediately go back to normal.

But then the door had opened. And you'd seen it: him, arm draped around MC, laughing and smiling the way he had around you.

You inhaled sharply, recalling Saeran's fixation with MC. How he'd obsessed over her and entirely replaced you, giving her the gifts and pet names and affection that you were starved for.

 _How stupid_ , you thought to yourself, hitting backspace. _As if I'd be the most important thing in his life._

With a heavy heart, you type in the characters that formed MC's name. It was so much more practical. You couldn't afford to test out too many passwords, and you already knew that Saeran hated you.

But you couldn't deny that it would hurt so much to know that Saeran had replaced you in his heart.

You let your index finger linger on top of the 'Enter' button, entirely unsure if your ignorance was bliss or not, until you couldn't bear to wait any longer. With a single flex, you'd pressed the key,

A second of buffer passed.

And then, your heart felt lighter. All hope was not lost.

_Error: Incorrect password._

_2 attempts remaining._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.5k
> 
> Notes: Uuurgh I have to work out for like an hour now >.> Not looking forward to that. I feel tired just thinking about it T^T Wish me luck 
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 2/13/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	14. XIV: Neutral Route (Luciel)

Luciel considered himself to be a fairly level-headed person. Even back when he called himself Saeyoung, he'd been able to make tough decisions, able to weigh the pros against the cons without bias.

He didn't know what quite came over him when V told him the truth.

_"Luciel, we've found your brother," V said, eyes gazing softly into Luciel's._

_The redhead stood still for, not really understanding the weight of the words. But that only lasted a moment; after a couple of seconds had passed, Luciel's lips were moving like a rapper, his mouth barely able to keep up with his mind._

_"How do you know? Who is he with? Is he safe? Where is he? Who gave you this information? How could Saera-"_

_V put a hand up, halting Luciel's questions. "It seems that..." V trailed off, hesitating as usual. "It seems that Rika is alive."_

_Luciel felt something inside him churn at the words. When V had first come to the RFA, pronouncing Rika dead by suicide, Luciel hadn't bothered asking what had become of Saeran. A part of him didn't want to know. Because if there was even a remote chance that Saeran had survived up until that point, he would have died without Rika to care forhim._

_But if Rika had never died..._

_"Is Saeran with Rika?"_

_V nodded his head, and Luciel felt relief flood his body. At that moment, he could have cried. He loved Saeran so much. So fucking much. When he thought that his other half had died, he felt incomplete. Withdrawn. Like a part of him was dead inside._

_But now, that was no longer the case._

_"How can I go see him?" It had been so long since the twins had been reunited. Too long._

_It was time for Luciel to come home._

_No._

_It was time for Saeyoung to come home._

_"You can't." V 's words were blunt, not shaped with the care he usually put into everything he did._

_Luciel felt his breath catch. "Why not?"_

_"It seems that....your brother is currently....well, the situation is complex...." V's words were empty, the blue-haired man stalling to confess a truth that Luciel suspected he did not want to hear. Luciel felt his expression turn hard, and he met V's eyes. The older man sighed and took his sunglasses off, wiping them and setting them on the table. He looked into Luciel's eyes. "Saeran is in the Mint Eye. And that Savior (Y/N) and MC keep talking about? That's..."_

_"Rika." Luciel murmured, finishing the horrible sentence V had started._

_Luciel didn't need to be told anything further, that information alone was enough. The Mint Eye was a cult for the deranged, a gathering of unstable minds. If Rika was the Savior, there was no doubt that she had Saeran doing ungodly work for the Mint Eye._

_Luciel closed his eyes, suppressing tears that were bubbling up._

_Saeran was leading the very life Luciel had left to protect him from._

_That information alone was enough for Luciel. It was so much to process; most of the knowledge had already set his mind in a daze. V, however, didn't stop talking. "You know that Ray person (Y/N) keeps mentioning?"_

_Luciel nodded, remembering the terrifying encounter they had when Ray hacked into (Y/N)'s laptop and threatened them. That man was genuinely psychotic. A freak. The way he spoke...that guy wasn't just mental, he was mentally deprived — the mark of a truly insane person._

_"That's Saeran."_

_Luciel felt his heart stop._

_"(Y/N) has been calling him by a different name because he-"_

_Luciel tuned out the rest of his words, numb before the truth._

Everything after was hazy, a product of the confusion and anger and unfairness Luciel saw in the world. He glanced at the empty spot where (Y/N) sat not two minutes ago as she worked, remembering her hesitant fingers and cautious breathing.

He almost laughed.

The girl feared him.

Not that he cared. If she had just been honest and called him Saeran from the start, Luciel would have received a lot more information a lot quicker than how he had been forced to do it.

Luciel sighed, pulling his laptop off his lap. He took a glance at the door, and, quickly walked over to the bed. Was she hiding information again? What had made her walk out of the room so quickly?

Luciel turned the laptop on the bed so that it was facing him and sighed.

 _That idiot_. He saw the sign-in interface, the user Saeran. _Did she try to get in by guessing his password? So much for her skills as a hacker._

Luciel rolled his eyes, almost walking away, before something pulled him back to the laptop. Saeran...still remembered him, right? Luciel thought about his own password for his mobile phone: _saeran_. All lowercase, no spaces, no special characters.

Would his brother be the same way?

The redhead typed his name out, a strange feeling as he hadn't done it in years. His fingers almost prompted him to type in 'Luciel' rather than 'Saeyoung,' but the boy caught himself before he made such a stupid mistake.

Luciel paused, finger hovering over the 'Enter' key. _This is ridiculous_ , he thought to himself. He didn't hope. He didn't allow himself to. That was what made life easier. If you never hoped, you were never disappointed.

But when the error message popped up, he still felt his heart sink a little.

_Error: Incorrect password._

_1 attempt remaining._

***

Luciel found it easy to ignore the white-haired girl.

Unlike MC, she knew when to keep quiet, her voice pleasantly unpresent as he discussed plans with Vanderwood and V. The five cabin-members had gathered in the kitchen, Vanderwood refilling his cup of coffee every ten minutes.

"We have to return to the Mint Eye. It's just a matter of when," Luciel said, groaning for the umpteenth time.

"I don't have time for you to play 'hero' just so you can feel better, Luciel. You have work," Vanderwood scowled, yet again threatening to taser Luciel.

"Vanderwood, please try to understand," V interrupted. "Luciel will become a much better agent when he can stop focusing on this. It's closure he needs."

Amidst all of this, (Y/N) had kept quiet whilst MC taunted her in a whisper.

The brown-haired girl thought no one could hear her, but the truth was that neither Vanderwood nor Luciel cared what MC said to (Y/N). And V was too busy trying to sort out the _ridiculous_ rescue mission Luciel was planning to worry about either of the girls.

"So, what made Luciel act like that toward you?" MC whispered, dangerously close to (Y/N)'s face. Luciel watched through the corner of his eye, rolling his eyes at MC's petty nature and at (Y/N)'s utter inability to defend herself.

"MC, shut up," He found himself saying before he had registered the words. "Unless you have something to add to this conversation, I suggest you keep your mouth shut like _her."_ Luciel gestured vaguely toward (Y/N), still too irate with her to even say her name.

"Oh, now you want my opinion?" MC asked, crossing her arms. "I think the whole idea of going to the Mint Eye is stupid. You literally helped me escape less than twelve hours ago, and now you want to go back? One of us is getting captured if we do that, and the Mint Eye won't hold back this time."

Luciel bit his lip. MC was stupid, loud, and obnoxious, but he couldn't deny that she had a point.

"We're not debating this. We're infiltrating the Mint Eye to retrieve someone. The only question is how. If you have any ideas relating to _that_ , then speak." Luciel scowled. He knew he was being unreasonable, but he also knew that he would do this mission solo, if needed.

Just then, V's phone rang. Luciel raised an eyebrow. "Is it Jumin?"

V shook his head. "An unknown number. I'll take this in the other room."

Luciel watched with narrowed eyes as V left, settling his gaze back on Vanderwood. "The window may still be accessible. It's risky, since they'll increase the perimeter security, but with your taser, the guards shouldn't be much of an issue." Luciel glanced down toward his shoes, where he hid a dagger at all times. "And I'm ready to kill anyone who stands in the way."

For the first time, (Y/N) spoke up. Luciel glared at her as she began, but his expression softened when he noted that she had something relevant to say. "No! I mean...no. The Mint Eye has more than enough cameras. They'll have reviewed the footage. They definitely know we escaped through the window. If it's still open, it's a trap."

Luciel stayed quiet for a moment. "And the Mint Eye is completely sealed, except for the front door."

He scowled. Rika, or The Savior as she liked to call herself now, had done an impressive job of making sure everything at the Mint Eye was securely handled. The window itself was only open because it was under Renovation. The door that led to the window, however, was locked tight. Luciel assumed that the only reason (Y/N) was able to get past it was because of her hacking; he, only the other hand, had come to the Mint Eye with explosives, ready to force entry if there was none.

"We can't blow anything up, this time. The Mint Eye will be expecting it. After what we just pulled, they're going to hear any blasts and will alert that Savior woman long before we're able to do what we need." Vanderwood's words were blunt, further emphasizing the fact that infiltrating the Mint Eye a second time was going to be difficult.

"Luciel," V called from another room, gesturing the redhead in. "Come here."

Luciel glanced around the kitchen. (Y/N) was biting her lip, MC sitting with a bored expression, and Vanderwood was drinking coffee. "This meeting is over." Luciel scowled, frowning at how unproductive the other people in his cabin were.

He walked over to V's room, shutting the door behind him.

"What?" Luciel's tone was sharp, the boy's frustration heightened from the previous events.

"I think I have a way to get Saeran back without us having to infiltrate the Mint Eye," V whispered. "But I'm not sure if we..."

"Give me the phone," Luciel said, holding his hand out. No doubt, this had something to do with the call V had received earlier.

"The call went to voicemail," V murmured.

Luciel fiddled with the phone for a moment, taking a moment to familiarize himself with the buttons before replaying the message that had been left on V's phone.

" _Hello, V_." Luciel's eyes widened. This was... _Rika!_

" _I'm sure you've discovered the truth by now, where Saeran really is. I regret not being more careful with (Y/N) but...well, I'll punish her for that later. Anyway, since you're so noble, I have no doubt that you've told our dear Saeyoung about where his brother is and...let me guess. You're trying to break into the Mint Eye to get the precious boy back."_

Rika laughed, but it wasn't the merry chime that Luciel was used to hearing from their childhood. It was deranged laughter: sick and twisted and cold.

 _"No need. Meet me a mile in front of the Mint Eye, right by the Ritual Grounds. You should remember the place well, shouldn't you?"_ Another cruel laugh followed, before Rika continued.

_"Bring Saeyoung. I haven't seen him in so long...and in exchange, I'll bring Saeran! The two brothers will get to see each other once more! I'll even give Saeran to you, forever, let them be reunited. They can have their happily-ever-after. There's only one thing I want in return."_

Rika paused, her voice cold once more and now devoid of the fake mirth she put into her words.

_"(Y/N). Hostage for a hostage. I'll see you in six hours."_

The phone beeped, signalling the end of the message.

Luciel leaned back against the wall, still a little shocked by Rika's voice. Then, he burst out into laughter. "This is perfect!" He said, grinning wildly. "All we need to do is give her that freeloader, and we have Saeran back! You know where the location is, right? The Ritual Grounds?"

V turned away. "Yes...it was where Rika and I first..." The man coughed, uncomfortable.

Luciel didn't notice. Instead, he chuckled, almost amused with how smoothly things had worked out. "Perfect. Truly perfect!"

V, on the other hand, didn't seem so elated. "Are you sure about this, Luciel? If we give (Y/N) to the Mint Eye...even MC knows what would happen to her."

"Who cares?" Luciel said, smiling. "It's the perfect trade. I want Saeran. Rika wants (Y/N). Why should we both be deprived of what we want when we can simply trade?"

Luciel grinned once more. For the first time, the stars had aligned so that he didn't need to struggle. "I'll make sure (Y/N) is ready. I think Vanderwood gave her new clothes...I'll have her put on her old dress." Luciel ignored V's stutters of protest, blinded by his happiness.

He closed the door without another word and grinned at the ceiling.

"Saeran, I'm coming for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.2k
> 
> Notes: I tried to update early today because I have an extremely hectic schedule for these next few days (going to a competitive conference!). Somehow, everything clears up by my next update so I'll let you know how it goes :) Wish me luck!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 02/17/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	15. XV: Neutral Route (Y/N)

Luciel had been acting strangely pleasant for the last four hours.

He'd wandered around the cabin with a sick smirk planted on his face, announcing something about going scouting around the Mint Eye to see if they could visually find any entrances.

You'd initially brushed your worries away, but when you walked into the kitchen to see Luciel washing your dress, you couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. "Luciel...?" Your voice was timid.

"Yes, (Y/N)? Oh," He looked down at the fabric between his hands. "I figured, since we're going out and all, that you should wear your dress. But it was a little dirty, so I washed it!" The redhead flashed you a smile, and you felt yourself step backward.

"Why are you being so..." _Creepy._ "Friendly to me? I thought you were upset with me?" You bit your lip, unsure of the response you'd get.

"There's no point holding on to the past, wouldn't you agree?" Luciel said, staring at the magenta satin. "Hey, why don't you shower? It's been almost a day since you've come here, so I'm sure you're dying to get clean."

Luciel ushered you out of the kitchen, saying, "Your dress will be dry when you're done, so take your time."

As you stood under the water that poured over your head, though, you couldn't help but feel suspicious. In the time you'd known him, Luciel had gone from cold and blunt at the Mint Eye, to friendly and charming up until you made out with him. He'd been passionate as he kissed you, but had depicted more anger than you'd ever seen in a person when he came charging at you afterward. Then he had grown distant, ignoring you almost as Saeran had, but now he was being friendly again?

You shuddered.

No.

Luciel wasn't being friendly.

He had the same look in his eye that people at the Mint Eye got whenever the Savior promised them something. His golden irises looked darker, no longer shining proudly like a king's crown but glistening darkly, like the diadem of the king's evil brother who was plotting something horrible from the shadows.

You tried to wash the sick feeling in your stomach away, rubbing your body all over with extra soap, trying not to wince as the flavored shampoo came into contact with the cuts that littered your body from when you fell off the ladder.

_It's only been sixteen hours since then, but it feels like it's been weeks._

You frowned, staring at your white hair as you lathered shampoo into it. The artificial color was a contrast to your skin, looking unnatural as it clung to your shoulders, wet.

You closed your eyes, pretending for a moment that you were in the Mint Eye. It wasn't hard. The strawberry-scented shampoo that Luciel had thrust into your hands was the exact same type the Savior had asked you to use. The smell brought you back to the Mint Eye, where, you realized, you truly were happy.

_It was the night before your second commitment. The night before your life fell apart._

_Saeran was dancing with you, pulling you with him as he slowly waltzed with you across the floor._

_The two of you were silent, not needing words to communicate when you could let your actions speak for you. Your head rested comfortably into the crook of Saeran's shoulder, and Saeran's loose grip around your waist was all the two of you needed to know that everything was okay._

_He took a step back and raised his arm, spinning your body around and then back into him where the two of you resumed what would be your final dance together._

_It was a peaceful moment, forever frozen in your mind as the perfect image of happiness. Your bliss, and his, intertwined in such a way that they were one: a snapshot of what life had been for you in the Mint Eye before you had renounced the magenta._

You sighed.

Those days were gone. Long gone.

You took a step backward, turning off the water after double-checking that your whole body was clean. Drying yourself with a fluffy towel, you observed the satin fabric of your dress cautiously as if Luciel had hidden a knife in it, meant to stab you as soon as you put the clothing on.

Finding nothing, you pulled the material over your body, finding the way it fit familiar. Almost comforting. You stared at your reflection in the mirror. Your hair was a damp and tangled mess, but the rest of you looked as immaculate as you had been in the Mint Eye.

You turned your body and twisted your neck, staring at the tattoo Saeran had placed on your back. You'd never admired it before, but as you stared at it, you realized more and more how even the lines were and how objectively perfect it was.

From the angle you were standing at, you realized that you didn't look like yourself at all. It was as if a filter had been placed over you. Even your untouched skin was faded to a grayed down version of your previous skin color.

A knock broke you from your thoughts. "(Y/N)?" Luciel's sickly sweet voice called. "Are you done in there?"

You opened the door and stepped out of the bathroom while Luciel observed the dress. "Everything looks good...but what about your hair?" He pinched the damp strands. "Do you need a comb? I think Vanderwood has hair ties lying around somewhere here..."

You put a hand up, stopping Luciel. "I can't."

Luciel arched an eyebrow. "You can't what?"

"I can't...do my own hair. In the Mint Eye, it was always either Saeran or the Savior..." You turned away, painfully aware of the subtle question you were asking. Was it too much? Luciel seemed to be in a better mood, but you weren't sure what his triggers were.

The redhead sighed. "Fine, then." He pulled you into his room. "I'll do it for you."

***

The car ride was awkward.

Luciel had originally argued that the only ones who even needed to go scouting were him, V, and you, but Vanderwood was quick to say that he wouldn't let himself be caught dead alone in a cabin with MC. Of course, once it was decided that Vanderwood was going, MC had decided she didn't want to be left behind, so the five of you crammed yourselves into Vanderwood's old car, the four-wheeler bringing you all closer and closer to the Mint Eye.

You brought your thumb to your lips, chewing on your nail.

It was a bad habit you had developed when you were a child, only surfacing when you were nervous. Your nails had grown out nicely in your time in the Mint Eye, you never really needing to worry, but the stress of seeing the building grow close was difficult to cope with.

"Relax, (Y/N)," Luciel murmured, the sick smile present on his face once more. "Everything's going to be over, soon."

"What do you mean?" You regarded his words suspiciously. This was just a scouting trip, right? Why would anything be over?

Luciel didn't respond, the car silent before V instructed Vanderwood to pull over.

"Alright, everyone out," The brunette instructed, stepping out of the car.

Once you were out, you were surprised. "Are we going to split up?"

Luciel shook his head. "We'll wait here."

You didn't question it. Something didn't feel right, but then, when did anything related to the Mint Eye ever feel right? You ignored the pit in your stomach, instead opting to inspect your surroundings.

Vanderwood had pulled over beside a large stone platform, circular with strange carvings inscribed in rings around the center. You bent down and inspected the stone, noting that the carvings looked old, but not old enough to be crumbling.

 _The Savior must have had this built for the Mint Eye_ , you realized, recalling how every few months, the Savior would take a group of disciples and bring them outside for a series of rituals. The Savior had confessed to you that this was her favorite place, outside the Mint Eye. She had promised to bring you, once, but you had escaped before she took you.

You pulled your gaze from the stone, looking up to see V and Luciel discussing something in hushed voices by the car. MC had wandered off, and Vanderwood was the only one doing actual reconnaissance work, observing the Mint Eye through binoculars.

You saw him jerk up.

"Someone's coming!" He shouted, drawing the attention of Luciel. "Everyone in the car—dammit, where's MC?!"

You spun your head around frantically searching for her eye-catching blob of brown hair. If someone was this wandering around this close to the Mint Eye, there were very limited options on who it could be.

You sprinted to the car, hoping to get in, only for Luciel to stop you. "Wait," He commanded, his expression hard.

"The fuck are you doing, Luciel? We have a better chance of finding MC if we prepare ourselves and all get in the ca-" Vanderwood was all over the place, gesturing madly, and practically shouting whilst the redhead in front of him remained calm.

"Who did you see, Vanderwood?" Luciel asked, his words slow.

" _That's_ what you care about?!" Vanderwood took a step toward Luciel, readying his hand to punch the younger agent.

You bit your lip, concerned for what would happen between the two when everyone halted, hearing a voice.

"He saw _me_."

You felt a quiver run down your spine, your bare back already chilly but now seeming to freeze as you felt a shiver of fear ripple through your very bones. _The Savior_ , you realized, fearful. You stood rooted to the spot, and no one seemed to speak until the same voice called out once more, much closer now.

"Are the arrangements ready, V?"

You didn't move, but your eyes darted to V, where you stared at the man in horror. Arrangements? Had he known that the Savior would come here? Is that why he had Vanderwood stop?

"They are." Luciel said, answering the question for V. "You take (Y/N), we get Saeran."

Your eyes widened as you realized what had put Luciel in such a good mood this morning. _It was an exchange_. You realized bitterly, hating yourself for not seeing the truth sooner. _I should have known._

"Of course, of course, but keep your voice down. I haven't told Saeran, yet. And by the look on (Y/N)'s face, it would seem you didn't inform her, either." The Savior said, her voice now directly behind you.

You pulled on the car door once more, hoping that it would open, or that you could pull the door out and use it to shield yourself from whatever horrors the Savior was going to force you through, but the only thing that happened was a firm grip finding itself on your arm.

You were afraid to look down, as if seeing the hand around your wrist would make it more real. Instinctively, though, you knew who it was. After so many years with him, how could you not know the feel of his hand?

"Saeran?" You asked, turning around to meet the eyes of the boy you had once loved so much.

He hardly responded, though, the mint green of his eyes dulled by his blank expression. He pulled you backward, and unlike the touch of anyone else, you found yourself unable to hold back as he led you to the Savior.

She stared at you, the smile you were used to seeing on her lips no longer present. Instead, she rolled her eyes. "I can't believe I'm trading Saeran for a weakling like you," She scowled. "But it's okay, (Y/N). This will make you strong. Strong like me. Do you know what it was that made me strong?" The Savior asked.

You didn't respond, not wanting to hear another word from her lips, but she answered the question herself.

"It wasn't enough that the man I loved _told_ me he didn't want me anymore. It was only when he _showed_ me that I realized the truth. And that, my sweetling," Rika cooed, pulling at a loose strand of hair from Luciel's hairstyle on you, "Is what will make you strong as well."

The Savior forced you to your knees.

You wondered, numbly, what she was going to do to you.

What more pain could she force you to endure that you hadn't handled already? You watched, distant, as she crossed her arms and spoke with Luciel and V. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Vanderwood shaking Luciel, shouting at the boy, but for some reason, their words were inaudible to your ears.

They were yelling, shouting, practically screaming at each other. But the sounds were nothing but distant noises on your ears, your entire body focused on Saeran, and where he went.

And why he came back holding MC's hand.

He stared at the girl with loving eyes, his expression not blank the way it was when he stared at you but instead filled with affection. _Is this what the Savior wanted me to see?_ You wondered, unable to help the scowl that formed on your face as you watched the two with envy. _Saeran and MC, together, happy?_

You pried your eyes away from the pair, gazing back at the Savior. _Or did she want me to think about how, after this exchange, Saeran and MC are going to make out on the same couch I kissed Luciel?_

You tried to shut your mind off, hating the very thought. You focused on the Savior's words, as she forced MC to her knees next to you and handed something to Saeran.

Pulling yourself from your daze, you forced yourself to listen.

"Choose, Saeran." She murmured, while Luciel watched from the side.

You made eye-contact with Vanderwood, who, for the first time, was unable to hold your gaze, crossing his arms and looking away. Even V, whom you had learned to be a voice of reason and ration, couldn't bear to watch.

"You know what this injection does," You heard Rika's voice continue. "And you know what will happen to whomever you pick. So, who will it be, Saeran? (Y/N)? Or MC?"

You dropped your gaze to the large syringe in Saeran's hands, noting the color. _The same color as the Elixir of Salvation_ , you realized with a start. _It's going to be injected into the bloodstream?_ You felt your heart palpitate at the very thought.

The Savior smiled at you, her expression cold as you understood the decision she was forcing Saeran to make.

Whoever he chose would enter a world of pain. No, not a world, an ultra-concentrated high-density galaxy of truly unendurable agony. You felt your heart beat faster, your eyes darting back and forth between the Savior's cruel smirk, Vanderwood, who was being held back by V, and Saeran, who was walking forward.

You and MC sat kneeling next to each other, barely a foot apart. Despite that, you knew as soon as Saeran took a step forward that he was heading toward you, not her.

You heard MC begging for Saeran not to do it to her, that she loved him and that she wouldn't do it to him. You opened your mouth, wondering if begging would save you for at least a minute longer, but you couldn't bring yourself to utter a single word as Saeran looked at you.

For the first time, his expression wasn't blank. Or angry. Or bored.

As he stared at you, whispering, "I'm sorry," you saw the look in his eyes: pure sorrow and remorse; but no regret.

That expression was the last thing you saw before Saeran plunged the needle into your neck, a new level of pain entering your body through your neck, spreading all over with no way of escaping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.7k
> 
> Notes: Blehh I just got back from the conference today and I didn't do too well. I won an award but I feel like I could have done so much better if I'd prepared more and made some different choices. On the flip side - I have a renewed sense of motivation to do even better so that'll definitely pull me through this! :)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 2/20/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	16. XVI: Neutral Route (Rika)

She should have brought disciples.

Or council members.

Hell, even believers would have been useful.

Rika picked up a glass vase and threw it at the wall, watching it shatter like the plans she had so carefully laid out.

Her plan made sense. She had worked so hard, giving Saeran high and higher dosages of the Elixir until the boy couldn't tell right from left, clinging onto Rika's words as the ultimate truth. She sat in front of him for eight hours straight, conditioning his mind until the white-haired boy truly believed that he loved MC. That he resented (Y/N).

So why did he still resist?

_Rika smiled proudly, watching Saeran inject the concentrated Elixir into (Y/N), just as she knew he was going to._

_"Saeran, wouldn't you like to spend some time with MC now?" Rika whispered into his ear, pulling him back as (Y/N)'s body began shaking uncontrollably, the girl too overwhelmed by pain to even scream._

_Rika cocked her head and gestured for MC to stand up. She ignored the brute called Vanderwood as he shouted insults at her and Saeyoung, instead opting to talk to the redhead. "You can take him, Sae-"_

_Saeyoung interrupted her, though. "I don't go by that name anymore." Rika raised an eyebrow. "Call me Luciel." He said._

_Rika almost rolled her eyes, but she figured she had wasted enough time._

_She got what she needed. Rika turned to V, her eyes cold and unmoving as she stared at her ex-lover. "Good luck bringing Saeran back," She said, not wasting a moment of pleasantries with a man she never wanted to be pleasant with again. "I highly doubt he'll come willingly."_

_She turned around, ignoring V's desperate response as she pulled (Y/N) up to her feet. The snowy-haired girl was barely able to stand for a moment before collapsing to the ground in pain, trembling and whimpering._

_Rika sighed, about to pull another syringe out of her pocket to temporarily halt the pain whilst she brought (Y/N) back the Mint Eye, but Saeran was faster. "Stop!" He shouted, utterly ignoring MC._

_Rika frowned._

_That was not a part of the plan._

_"Go with MC, Saeran, that is a direct order." Rika knew her voice had authority. She thought that Saeran would listen to her if not out of loyalty, then out of fear; but the boy proved her wrong._

_In that instant, his eyes had clarity, as if he had pushed the Elixir out of his system through sheer will, and his judgment was no longer clouded by its effects._

_"No!" He shouted, scooping (Y/N) up into his arms. "This...this must be even worse than her secondary commitment! The pain must be horrible! I have to take care of her!"_

_Rika clenched her jaw. If she ever had the opportunity again, she would not hold back against Saeran. She had been merciful with the elixirs, in the future, she would drown him in the liquid until he forgot about (Y/N) altogether._

_"Are you disobeying me, Saeran?" Rika asked._

_The question was simple._

_The answer was simple._

_Saeran, however, was conflicted._

_Rika's eyes widened, shocked that the boy even had to think to answer. "You stupid fool!" She screeched, raising a hand to strike Saeran, only to be blocked by Saeyoung._

_Up until that moment, the redhead had stayed out of his brother's line of sight. No doubt, he had planned some kind of special speech, hoping that his brother would be as happy as he was at the prospect of them no longer being separated._

_But it seemed that Saeyoung was willing to toss that aside to ensure that his baby brother wasn't hurt any further._

_What a mistake._

_The expression that came across Saeran's face when he saw the face of the person he had spent so long resenting was sheer anger._

Rika clenched and unclenched her hands. If only Saeyoung had stayed out of sight, Saeran would have been controllable. Manageable.

But the redhead was impatient.

_"Get away from me, you traitor!" Saeran shouted, still holding (Y/N)'s delicate body, before sprinting away from his brother. All those hours he spent in the Mint Eye's private gym paid off, Saeran scarcely slowed by the weight of the girl he was carrying._

_In that moment of madness, Luciel had shouted for everyone to get in the car, V, Saeyoung, MC, and Vanderwood all reacting within in instance to drive after the vague direction Saeran had run off to._

_Leaving Rika._

"No Saeran, no (Y/N)," Rika murmured, frustrated. "I don't even have MC anymore."

Rika picked up another vase and threw it, the anger she felt nowhere near dissipated.

She scowled, remembering (Y/N). _My plan was perfect. If only Saeyoung hadn't let Saeran see him...if only Saeran could forget about (Y/N) and just love MC!_

Rika shuddered, realizing that she was panting heavily.

She calmed herself, remembering that her behavior was not fit for a Savior of the Mint Eye. She must be ladylike, polite, rational. She should deal with her anger in better ways.

 _To hell with that!_ Rika thought, throwing another vase.

She began throwing everything she could, letting loose all the emotions she had pent up from the very first day she met (Y/N). _Why?_ Rika asked herself.

It wasn't fair.

(Y/N) was so similar to Rika. Too similar. In truth, Rika saw herself in (Y/N). They'd both grown up in hellhole environments, been tossed aside by the world itself, so why... _Why does (Y/N) get to have someone who loves her no matter what, when V only tries to change me? Why does (Y/N) get to have what I don't?_

The blond felt tears pour down her cheeks.

No matter what Rika did to ruin their relationship, Saeran always loved (Y/N).

Why wouldn't V be like that?

She let out a wail of agony. Rika knew how (Y/N) resented her, how Saeran hated the Elixirs and how nearly everyone in the Mint Eye thought her a bad person for forcing them to deal with pain. _But if they knew the pain I felt every day_ , Rika thought, _They'd know that their physical pain is a blessing when compared to my mental suffering_.

Rika slowed, her breathing ragged as she calmed down. She realized that she had sunk to the floor, crying pathetically less like a Savior and more like someone who still needed saving.

She stared at her reflection in the white tiles. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were no longer shining, and the expression on her face was utterly bohemian. She looked up, staring at the hundreds of pieces of glass and china that surrounded her on the floor. _What do I need to do for you to love me, V? For you to love me how Saeran and Saeyoung seem to love (Y/N)?_ She wondered. _Why can't you see that I'm spreading happiness at the Mint Eye?_

She bit her lip, hating that V had left.

Rika only had two passions in life. V was one of them. Spreading happiness was the other. V had promised, when they were still children, that he would never hinder her mission to spread happiness, that he would be by her side the whole time. _The Mint Eye_ _is the best way to spread happiness. Why can't V see that?_

When V left, saying that she had to choose between him and the Mint Eye, she chose the Mint Eye. She chose to spread happiness.

But even she couldn't do it alone.

She recruited people slowly, but steadily. It started with Saeran. And then it built upward, until she'd finally found the heir she'd been looking for: the (h/c) girl herself, (Y/N).If only things had gone as planned, everything would be perfect! 

Rika cursed inwardly, hating how everything had gone awry. _(Y/N) was supposed to feel my pain, go through with Saeran what I went through with V! (Y/N) was never supposed to be happy! She was supposed to become strong, the same way I became strong - to become the next Savior of the Mint Eye!_

Biting her lip, the blond-haired woman tried to ignore the quiet voice in her mind that reminded her that (Y/N) had never seemed truly happy with here. That even as a Savior, (Y/N) still might not attain the happiness Rika was so focused on spreading.

 _But for the sake of the Mint Eye..._ Rika trailed off, now considering the thought. Considering (Y/N). 

Did Rika need (Y/N) as much as she thought—or was that just what she had forced herself into believing for lack of better alternatives?

She closed her eyes.

And slowly, the notion in her head seemed to make more and more sense.

(Y/N) was a bad idea. She came with a hundred strings attached and was a complex person, an imperfect candidate for what Rika needed her for. _Yes,_ Rika thought, reopening her eyes. _I don't need (Y/N). I don't need Saeran. I can start fresh. I can pick new people, better people._

She smiled.

 _I can afford to lose them_ , she thought triumphantly, remembering the incredible pool of resources available to the Mint Eye.

It was a conclusion that satisfied every part of Rika. The sincere side of her that still wanted everyone to be happy knew that (Y/N) would be safe with Saeran or Saeyoung. And the deranged part inside of her was satisfied as well, recalling the affectionate eyes (Y/N) gazed at Saeran with, as well as how she had longingly stared at Saeyoung.

 _(Y/N)...does she even realize that she's in love with them both?_ Rika chuckled. _She will make herself miserable. Not in the same way I've been through pain, but because she's going to have to decide._

The blonde smiled to herself, picking her body off the floor.

"I'll let you go, my sweet (Y/N)," Rika said, as if the girl were listening, hearing the words. "But in exchange, you have to choose."

"Who will you love?" Rika whispered.

_" Saeran or Saeyoung?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.7k
> 
> Notes: And with that we conclude the neutral route! If you made it this far, congratulations and thank you so much for sticking with this story (btw sorry for updating a day late lol - i actually had this prewritten but i fell asleep before i remembered to post it) and I appreciate all the support I've received from you guys thus far. But the story isn't over yet! It's time for the readers to pick which route this fanfic will take for (Y/N)'s love interest! Saeran? Or Saeyoung? 
> 
> Both boys will have ~6 chapters or more, and both endings will be written! I am currently publishing on 4 platforms: Ao3, fanfiction.net, tumblr, and Wattpad. Based on the total number of comments and dms I get specifying either Saeran or Saeyoung, that will decide which route I write first. Note that if, for example, over half of you guys want me to write Saeyoung's ending first, then I'll write his full ending (no switching back and forth from Saeyoung's route to Saeran's route) out before switching to Saeran- so pick wisely because that's the boy you'll be seeing the most of for the next few weeks! 
> 
> Please leave a comment or drop me a dm saying which route you'd like to see me write - my goal is to have the next chapter up by Monday but if there are zero comments, then I'll wait til the next update (Thursday). If there's still nothing by that point, I'll flip a coin and leave it up to chance! So get your vote in and I'll see you later <3 Thank you for all your support!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 2/24/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	17. XVII: Saeyoung's Route (Saeyoung)

(Y/N) hadn't moved.

Arguably, she had been moving the whole time, her entire body shaking with a ferocity Luciel had never seen in a human before, but her position hadn't changed even once.

"Feel like shit, yet? Or need me to beat it into you?" Vanderwood called from behind Luciel. The brunette male hadn't said a word to him since they found Saeran and (Y/N). He was too pissed with the redhead. Luciel had consciously refrained from telling Vanderwood that their 'reconnaissance trip' was really a hostage exchange because he knew how the older man would feel about it.

Then again, older men, in general, were usually right. Lived a couple more years. Smarter. Wiser. 

Luciel now wished he had spoken to Vanderwood before following through his plans, regretting his every decision.

"You can beat it into me," Luciel offered. He did feel like shit, worse than shit, actually, but he thought he deserved pain after what he realized he was putting (Y/N) through.

Vanderwood was quiet for a moment, watching as Luciel stared at (Y/N) while she trembled on the bed. The room was dark, and for once, Luciel wasn't fiddling away on his laptop.

Luciel heard Vanderwood sigh. "You can talk to me, you know? You don't need to pretend."

Luciel ignored Vanderwood's words, staring forward as (Y/N) kept trembling. "Fine," Luciel heard Vanderwood say before walking forward. "See if you can get her to drink this water. It might help."

Without waiting for a response, Vanderwood left the room, leaving Luciel awkwardly holding the glass of water. "Uh, (Y/N)?" He murmured, awkwardly trying to get the girl's attention. He knew she was conscious; her eyes were scrunched tight, and she had groaned something incomprehensible on the way back to the cabin every time someone touched into her. _But conscious doesn't mean aware_ , Luciel remembered dully, unsure of what to do.

He shifted himself half onto the bed and tried to pull (Y/N) into a sitting position, and the girl's eyes fluttered open for a brief second. "Drink," Luciel whispered, putting the glass to her lips. He wasn't even sure if the girl had processed what he said, but he saw her sip from the glass ever-so-slightly and sighed in relief.

"Shit, (Y/N)," He began, "I'm so sorry. Fuck. I don't know what I was thinking and-"

Luciel saw (Y/N)'s eyes open, her irises dilated to give them a glossy look. "S...Sae...." Luciel's ears perked up. (Y/N) could speak? Was she going to say his name? _Does she even know that my real name is Saeyoung?_ Luciel thought to himself, staring intently as (Y/N) struggled to speak.

"Saeran?" She finally said, opening her eyes.

Luciel felt himself shrink inside, realizing that while the girl before him was conscious, she wasn't herself. _She thinks I'm my brother_ , Luciel thought, trying not to let himself feel saddened by the realization.

Too temporarily stunned to speak, Luciel gazed into (Y/N)'s eyes and saw the glossy look in her pupils. She was seeing, yes, but not _seeing_. Aware, but not _aware_. (Y/N), but not _(Y/N)._

"Y-yeah," The redhead stuttered out, willing to play along with (Y/N)'s hallucination if it would make her feel even a little better. "It's me, (Y/N). Saeran."

(Y/N) chuckled a little, coughing as the light breaths left her throat. "I've missed you...so much."

"Yeah, I know," Luciel whispered, stroking the girl's hair tenderly. "I've...missed you, too."

"Really?" The snowy-haired girl's eyes filled with tears. "Oh, Saeran, these past few days have been horrible. I...I think I swallowed the Elixir again somehow. I don't remember anything. But everything hurts."

Luciel tore his gaze away from (Y/N).

 _I'm sorry_ , he wanted to say, but didn't. If he apologized now, while (Y/N) was in such a delusional state, it would only be for his personal sanity. It would be a selfish act, done out of self-preservation. The girl was too confused to do anything other than forgive him, and Luciel wasn't sure he deserved forgiveness.

"The pain will go away," Luciel whispered, but he couldn't be sure.

When Vanderwood's car had finally caught up to Saeran, the boy had struggled endlessly before he allowed the group to take (Y/N). Even then, he had insisted on coming along and refused to say a word to Luciel, ignoring the redhead completely as he rode back to the cabin on the top of Vanderwood's car, whereupon he set up camp outside the cabin so that he could be close to (Y/N) at all times but wouldn't have to tolerate the sight of Luciel.

When asked if (Y/N) would be okay, Saeran had only turned his head away, unable to answer.

"Will it, really?" (Y/N) said to Luciel, gazing at him with eyes full of hope. She didn't wait for an answer. "Thank you, Saeran. You're always here for me."

She reached a shaky hand out from her spot on the bed to rest a palm on top of Luciel's. "Lay with me on the bed," She whispered to Luciel, and he was too weak to refuse.

As he brought an arm around her, though, she had already fallen asleep in his arms, murmuring a soft, 'thank you, Saeran,' before she had drifted off completely, the quaking of her body ceased.

Luciel groaned, his stomach twisting.

He had fucked _everything_ up.

(Y/N) was in pain. Saeran wouldn't speak to him. Vanderwood was pissed. Even V, who had a million secrets of his own, felt that Luciel had made the wrong decision in going through with the hostage exchange.

"If I could do it all over..." Luciel mused out loud, wondering.

If he could change his actions, what better course was there to take? Luciel at least had Saeran now, that was a huge step. His eyes flicked downward to (Y/N), where a light perspiration had broken out on her forehead. _Was it worth it?_ He wondered.

"Luciel!" He heard Vanderwood shout.

The redhead darted out of bed, not wanting the elderly man to misread the situation. "What?" Luciel asked.

"It's...your brother."

Luciel's eyes widened, and then he was out of the room, heading straight for Saeran.

***

"Stay ba-" Saeran tried to shout, holding a hand up to stop Luciel from coming any closer, but couldn't complete his sentence as he began vomiting into a bush. "S-stay back!" He repeated weakly, his entire body shivering.

"Please," Luciel pled, "You need help, Saera-"

"Don't call me that!" Saeran shouted, further edged on before he continued retching on the ground. Luciel stared in shock. His brother wasn't throwing up any solids, it was all liquid - a sick, neon blue-green liquid that smelled of at least eight different chemicals.

 _Shit! The Elixir!_ Luciel thought to himself. _That's what's Rika's been forcing Saeran to take? That's what (Y/N) has in her bloodstream?_

The situation wasn't good. Vanderwood pressed a hand to Luciel's shoulder, holding the boy back before he could run to his brother like he wanted. "Don't, Luciel."

Luciel wanted to respond, convince Vanderwood that if he just had some time alone with his brother, he could explain—but Saeran started speaking before he could open his mouth. " _Luciel?"_ His tone was mocking. "You didn't just abandon me, you abandoned everything. Your name. Your past. You were even going to abandon (Y/N)!" Saeran's voice rose, and he stood up, steadying himself against a birch tree. "Don't you know what they do to people in the Mint Eye?!"

Luciel didn't respond. He couldn't.

"Well?!" Saeran's angry tone would have been enough to make anyone flinch, but Luciel stood unmoving as his brother lashed out at him.

"You don't know anything! You're dumb! Useless! A jerk! You're such a fucking asshole! It's been years, _years_ , and you can barely even talk to me! What the fuck were you thinking when you left?! How did you think I'd be happy?! Or was that a lie? Was it all just so that you'd be free of me, happy to do whatever you wanted without your little brother to weigh you down?"

"No!" Luciel shouted in response, horrified by the idea. "I-I didn't do it for me," He said, desperately hoping for Saeran to believe the words.

"You expect me to believe that you did it for me?!" Saeran shouted, furious at the prospect. Luciel saw his brother's jaw clench, his entire face contorted in unmasked anger.

"Yes," Luciel whispered. "I...You...I couldn't let you stay! You wouldn't have been happy!"

"You didn't have to leave!" Saeran shouted, and for a moment, Luciel thought he saw tears in his brother's eyes. "How the fuck did you expect me to be happy without you?!"

Vanderwood had gone back inside the cabin, giving the two Choi twins their privacy as they sorted out years of misunderstandings, resentment, and anger. Luciel took a step toward his brother, and then another when he realized that Saeran wasn't backing away.

"I..." Luciel didn't know what to say. "I saw pictures...Rika sent me pictures. Of you. Smiling. Happy."

"You saw two pictures where I wasn't frowning and concluded that I was living a life of rainbows and sunshine?! A life of happiness?! You couldn't even send me a message?!" Saeran's words were growing in volume, the younger brother growing angrier with every word. "You abandoned me. For no reason! The Savior...Rika...she...she couldn't replace you! No one could! Not her, not MC, not even (Y/N)!"

Luciel's eyes widened. "Saeran..." He murmured, now standing only a foot from his brother as he saw that his twin was crying. "I'm sorry."

Saeran looked away, unable to meet Luciel's eyes. "You think one apology changes anything?" The younger's tone was hostile, but it was no longer shouting, the previous anger every word was dipped in no longer present.

"No...but I won't ever leave again. I promise. I swear," Luciel fumbled around his neck, searching for the chain he had never taken off. The chain Saeran had given him for his seventh birthday. "I swear to God, Saeran, I won't ever leave you again. I swear to God, to you, to me, to everything."

Luciel noticed how Saeran's eyes settled on the silver cross around his neck. There was no doubt, they both remembered the day they had purchased it.

_"Saeran, don't cry! Here, look, it's candy!" Seven-year-old Luciel exclaimed, trying to cheer his brother up as he wept on the sidewalk. The boy waved a lollipop in front of his brother's face, hoping to distract Saeran from the predicament they were in._

_"B-b-b-b-but m-mommy said..." Saeran trailed off, barely able to form the first half of his sentence before breaking off into wails of distress._

_"Mommy didn't mean it, Saeran," Luciel murmured, sitting next to his brother._

_Their mother, abusive as ever, had shouted at the two of them to leave the house and to never come back, that they were the reason things were so tense between her and daddy and that everyone was better off without the two redhead twins._

_"How do you know?" Saeran murmured, burrowing his head into his knees, horrified at the prospect of not having a home._

_Luciel pondered for a moment, before jumping up. "Wait here, Saeran!" He called, already dashing off._

_Saeran blinked, confused, but didn't cry. He had utter faith in his elder brother; Luciel would never leave him, he knew. They were twins. Two halves that were only complete when together. When all else failed, he knew his big brother would always be there by his side._

_And he was right to trust in his brother! Luciel had returned, holding something shiny in his small hands. "Here!" He exclaimed, flashing Saeran a blinding grin. "This is how I know that everything will be okay!"_

_Saeran stared at the pendant. "A...plus sign?"_

_"No!" Luciel laughed. "A cross!"_

_"Oh," Saeran said, remembering the giant cross that decorated the church they sat in every Sunday, right next to V and Rika._

_"God is watching over us, Saeran," Luciel said with a smile, trying to put the necklace around Saeran's neck, but the boy refused._

_"You wear it," Saeran insisted stubbornly. Luciel arched an eyebrow, and the younger was quick to respond. "You'll watch over me, so I'm all taken care of. So you need someone to take care of you! So you should wear the necklace so God can watch over you!"_

_Saeran laughed, and in the moment, everything was okay. Mommy's words were forgotten, and daddy's abusive habits were bygones, because Saeran was being protected - by none other than his guardian angel big brother, who, in turn, was being shielded by God._

"Who...who's been protecting you all these years, with Rika so mental?" Luciel asked, regretting that the answer wasn't him.

"I've protected myself," Saeran whispered. "And you? Do mom and dad still beat you, or did you leave?"

"I..." Luciel swallowed. _He doesn't know?_ He thought to himself, before recalling how controlling Rika had become. The woman wouldn't leak any information to Saeran that he didn't need.

"What?" Saeran's voice was sharp, sensing the hesitance in Luciel's tone. "What did you do, Saeyoung?"

Luciel bit his lip. It had been so long since anyone had called him 'Saeyoung.'

"I..."

Luciel couldn't force the words past his lips. They were simple. Three words that he'd already confessed once to Vanderwood before.

"Saeyoung." Saeran's tone grew serious. "What did you do."

Luciel swallowed, trying to keep the growing pit of anxiety in his stomach from rising. "Mom and dad...they...it's...it's why I gave you to Rika...I..."

Saeran said nothing as Luciel stammered out fragmented phrases, waiting for Luciel to say the words that would mean something. The white-haired boy was staring straight into Luciel's eyes, mint greens meeting gold in a confusing exchange of emotion.

 _"I killed them_ ," Luciel whispered, his voice soft enough to have been carried away by the breeze.

Saeran held his silence, saying nothing.

Luciel tried to read the expression of the boy he once knew so well, hating that the mint green was like a mask that kept any true expression from showing. The redhead wanted to say something more, break the silence, but he knew that task was up to his brother.

"Do you...regret it?" Saeran asked.

Luciel was thrown off by the question.

"Do you think you made the wrong choice?" Saeran explained.

"No," Luciel said. "I did the right thing. The only thing I regret is...not keeping you with me afterward."

Saeran sighed, looking up at the sky. Only then did Luciel notice that it had darkened considerably. "Have you forgiven yourself for killing them?" Saeran murmured, not meeting Luciel's eyes.

The redhead looked down at the ground, noticing a trail of ants each carrying small pieces of leaves on top of their bodies. They were such small creatures, holding such a large burden over their heads as they worked together. He noticed the ants amalgamate into a small cube formation, protecting them as the sky let loose its first few drops of precipitation before the rest came tumbling down, turning into a full rainstorm within seconds, but the ants had united. They were protected, shielded from the rain.

"Yeah," Luciel said, not caring that he was getting wet. "I have."

"Good," Saeran said, meeting the redhead's eyes. "Why didn't you want to tell me?"

The way he asked the question, so innocently as if Luciel were keeping something trivial as a crush from Saeran, broke Luciel's heart. "It's...not something you want to admit, you know? It's like saying it out loud makes it more true. It's been so long since I've seen you, talked to you...I didn't want you to know what kind of person I'd become."

Saeran stared at the ground, not saying anything for such a long time that Luciel almost thought he had forgotten that they were in the middle of a conversation.

"I've killed people, too," Saeran whispered above the tumult of the rain.

"Fuck," Luciel said out of instinct, not noticing tears streaming down his own face as droplets of water mixed with them. "I was trying to protect you from that kind of life when I gave you to Rika."

Saeran chuckled, a sound Luciel hadn't heard in years. His golden irises widened as he gazed at the boy in front of him. "No surprise there, eh?" Saeran said with an amused smile. "We're two halves to the same whole. If you're a killer, so am I. When you're miserable, so am I. When you're happy, so am I. Funny how life has worked out."

Luciel ran a hand through his hair, swiping back red strands that clung to his forehead. "Does that mean you're happy right now, Saeran?" He asked, desperately hoping that the answer was a yes. "Cause I know it's fucked up, but the fact that you're even here....makes me happier than I've been in a long time."

Saeran's response wasn't immediate, but he eventually did open his mouth. "Yeah, Saeyoung. I am...happy." He flashed a lazy grin at his brother, a smile that Luciel had missed in their time apart. "Should I call you Luciel from now on? That'll take some getting used to, bu-"

"No," He said firmly. "I...I'm not Luciel. Luciel didn't have a brother. He didn't kill his parents. Luciel was a good kid."

"Then Luciel sounds like a boring fuck," Saeran said, chuckling.

"He was," The redhead said, smiling. "I'm ready to be Saeyoung again."

Saeran smiled. "Good." He offered his hand out for Saeyoung to shake.

"A handshake?" Saeyoung scoffed. "We haven't seen each other in half a decade, and you want a handshake? Fuck that." Saeyoung said, pulling his brother in for a tight hug.

"I didn't consent to this," Saeran grumbled before grudgingly wrapping his arms around his brother in return, sighing as the rain beat down around them, weighing down every spot in the world except the ground where they stood: two halves united as one for the first time in years. In their tight embrace, they didn't notice time passing, the rain stopping, the ants on the ground moving onward.

To the Choi twins, the world had finally stopped for them and given them a break. A chance to breathe. A chance to be with each other. Nothing would ever be able to convince them otherwise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 3.1k
> 
> Notes: Soo we actually ended up tying with 2 votes for Saeran and 2 for Saeyoung, that's why this chapter was so late. I kept thinking that someone would come along and break the tie...but it's not fair to those who are reading, so I flipped a coin and ended up going with the Saeyoung route. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, and I'll see you in the next update!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/05/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	18. XVIII: Saeyoung's Route (Y/N)

The pain never left you.

After your primary commitment at the Mint Eye, it followed you like a shadow, everything a reminder of the brutal suffering the Elixir had inflicted on you. Then, once your secondary commitment passed, the pain was a ghost that whispered agonies into your ear at every corner, constantly following you—though it seemed to disappear after a blink.

As such, the pain you felt when you opened your eyes was familiar.

Familiarly miserable.

"Saeran," You had mumbled, seeing the familiar face scrunched up in worry. The boy had hesitated for a moment and then burst into a firework of apologies and curses and apologies. You didn't remember what you had said to him, but you recalled his warmth as he wrapped his arms around you when you drifted off.

In his arms, the pain stopped.

When you reawoke, though, he was gone.

You tried to pull yourself out of bed, ignoring the blinding headache that was hammering on in your mind. Pain coursed through your veins, your heart facilitating its spread with every steady _thump_ it beat out.

_What had happened_?

You tried to remember something, anything, but there's just a giant gap in your memory. _I escaped from the Mint Eye...then what?_ You struggled to remember, but it slowly came back. The blanks began to fill in, how you'd stayed with Vanderwood and Luciel, and offered to work with them. You felt a blush come to your cheeks, recalling how you kissed Luciel...but everything afterward was a jumble.

_It's no use_. You couldn't remember a thing.

You glanced around the room.

On your left, there was a half-drunk glass of water. Was it yours? You didn't know, but the sight of the liquid forced the realization that your mouth was incredibly dry. Ignoring the pain that flitted through your arm as you moved it, you grabbed the glass and downed the water in it.

If you'd had the strength, you would have stood up and gotten more water, your thirst not quite quenched yet, but the simple motion of moving your arm was more than you could handle.

You collapsed on the bed, waiting for someone to come in.

Surprisingly, your wait didn't last. The door opened, and you were instantly met by Saeran's friendly eyes, his mint green eyes glowing a bright...gold?

"(Y/N)?" You heard him call, and you blinked again, trying to clear your vision to no avail.

"Saeran?" You mumbled, trying to keep your sentences short and coherent despite the acute pain that was beating itself through your body.

"A-ah, I'm actually Luciel. Err, Saeyoung."

"Sae...young?" You inquired, your head a mess.

"Yeah. Saeyoung. My real name." He confirmed, walking over to your bed. You stared at him for a moment, your eyes blank as they processed the new information. Then, like a dam clearing, a flood of information swept through your mind and you understood out what was happening. _Ah, it's Luciel._ You thought to yourself. _Wait, not Luciel. Sae...young? Saeyoung? Saeyoung. Yes, it fits him. Saeyoung, of Saeyoung and Saeran. Saeyoung, my knight in shining armor._

You chuckled lightly as you added that last part, the words just seeming to fit. Then, a swarm of pain erupted in your chest like bees, the mirth short-lived, but the feelings of amusement remained.

"(Y/N)? Are you okay?" Saeyoung asked, his body hunched over so that he could look you in the eyes as he spoke.

"Y-yeah," You murmured. "I'm good. Thanks, Saeyoung." You said, testing the syllables on your tongue.

"I..." He began, looking away. "How mentally competent are you right now?"

"What...?" You blinked. Your brain was too tired to figure out what he was asking.

"I mean," Saeyoung said, running a hand through his red locks as he stared at the ground. "How fuzzy is your mind right now? With the Elixir in your system? We have a doctor coming within the next few hours but...do you think you'll remember anything I say now?"

You thought for a moment. _What does he want to tell me?_ You wondered, confused. "I don't," You began. "I don't think I'll remember this. Because I'm pretty sure you or Saeran or someone visited me before and I barely remember that. But I remember how I felt."

You whispered that last part, but Saeyoung's ears caught it.

"How...how did he make you feel? The person who checked in on you before?"

"Safe." You said in an instant, the word out of your mouth before you could process the question. It was instinctive, almost as much of a reflex as the sheer familiarity and comfort that memory brought...being wrapped in gentle arms that supported you as much as they clung to you. "He made me feel safe and...happy."

"I see," Saeyoung said with an unreadable expression.

"Was it..." _No._ You didn't let yourself ask the question. In all honesty, you feared the answer. What if you were wrong?

"Was it what?" Saeyoung said, turning to you once more, now much closer.

"Was it...you?" You said, bringing your eyes up to meet his golden ones. "Were you the one who held me until I fell asleep?"

Saeyoung glanced away, but the pink blush on his cheeks was an answer enough. You didn't need your mind functioning at full steam to read the man's little quirks. You had barely known him two days (though who could be certain anymore, the Elixir always deluded your sense of time) but it felt like a lifetime.

"Yeah," He said after a long time. "Would you...like me to do it again?"

The hesitance in Saeyoung's voice was unusual. Even when he had first kissed you, he had been confident. In the present moment, though, he left the decision utterly up to you.

You welcomed him into your bed.

Barely able to move, he nudged your frame awkwardly as he pulled himself under the blanket and wrapped his arms around yours. He then brought a delicate hand to your hair, stroking it as Saeran had so long ago, but not in the airy, friend-zoned way the white-haired male had done. With Saeyoung, it was different. _Romantic._

"What I was saying earlier," Saeyoung coughed. "When I asked how mentally competent you were...That was just because I just wanted to know if you would remember me apologizing or not. I don't know if you remember, but...I...I brought you to Rika. I was planning on exchanging you...for Saeran. I'm so sorry, (Y/N), I know it's fucked up. I just..."

You interrupted Saeyoung's tangent, holding the boy off on the impending mess of apologies and whispers he was about to deliver. "Who brought me back from Rika?"

"Saeran was the one who kept her from taking you."

"Yes, but," You took a breath. "Who brought me back? And tucked me in bed? Gave me water? Stayed by my side?"

Saeyoung didn't respond, but his silence said more than words could.

"Who is holding my hand right now and letting me forget the pain for the first time in hours?" You forced your chin upward, the motion surprisingly bringing forth no pain, and locked eyes with Saeyoung. The two of you were unable to break eye contact, only then aware of the fact that your faces were just inches apart.

Through your peripheral vision, you saw Saeyoung's throat bob up and then down as he swallowed. His breathing hitched, and he gazed at you with eyes full of affection.

_Is this okay?_ You could practically hear him think. His hesitance was astonishing—and impressive. He had the girl of his dreams, _literally in bed with him_ , two inches away from his lips, and yet, you could hear his inner monologue argue with itself as it debated whether kissing you under the influence of the Elixir was _ethical_ or not.

How could you tell him that there wasn't any debate to be had? In that particular moment, after years of pain and misery, and being in a constant daze from the Elixir, your mind had never been clearer. Your thoughts never more united. Your desires never this intense.

You wanted _him_.

But how could say that?

You bit your lip.

You wouldn't be able to tell him. Clear as your heart was, you doubted you had the mental capacity to walk him through a full explanation of your emotions. You doubted you even had the vocabulary to portray the intensity of what you felt.

No, you couldn't tell Saeyoung a thing.

You could only show him.

Not waiting a moment longer, you pushed upward and pressed your lips against Saeyoung's. The kiss wasn't intense, fueled by lust as your makeout session with him had been, earlier. It was sweet and special.

Intimate.

You let your lips rest on his and only then noticed the little things. How his hair tickled against your forehead as he leaned downward. How his hands had traveled from your hair to your waist. How he had taken his glasses off earlier, almost as if he were expecting this.

You smiled into the kiss, unable to sense a single trace of pain in your body as Saeyoung melted your suffering away.

He flitted his tongue out, a quick motion that didn't go unnoticed by you. Without hesitance, you opened your mouth and welcomed him further inside you, loving how the moment wasn't rushed or even heated, but how he kissed you slowly to make everything more sensual that you could have imagined.

"Shit, wait," Saeyoung said, more to himself than to you.

You mumbled in dissatisfaction, irate as he pulled back.

"I shouldn't be doing this," He said, moving to leave the bed.

You stopped him.

"No." You pouted, forcing your arm around his body so that he was trapped in your embrace.

Your movement was quick, the arm already laid across his body before you felt the pain that followed the sudden movement. In actuality, you wouldn't be able to hold him there if he truly wanted to move. You knew it. And he knew it.

But still, Saeyoung remained and he laid his head down on the pillow, just above yours. He brought his hand up to your hair and stroked it once more. "Alright, I'll stay."

This time, you knew as you felt yourself being pulled toward the dreamworld, Saeyoung would be there when you woke up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.7k
> 
> Notes: Guess who's sick! Ordinarily, this would really suck since it means that I'll only be busier once I've recovered, but honestly I couldn't care less right now because I'm looking forward to being able to chill for a short while. :) Also I want to get a head-start on the next few chapters. On that note - I really want to thank anyone who's ever commented or left kudos for this story! Reading your comments is SUPER refreshing (and I read every single one) and that's what keeps me continuing this story every week <3
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/09/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	19. XIX: Saeyoung's Route (Y/N)

You couldn't be sure what time it was when you next woke up.

You knew that it had been afternoon when you were last awake, but as you stared out the windows, only darkness could be seen. _Early in the morning or late at night_ , you concluded, after a moment of thinking.

Either way, a decent amount of time had passed. Saeyoung, still next to you, was in different clothes and his hair was washed, the fiery red now tamed and combed neatly. "Saeyoung?" You asked, using your voice to stir him from his slumber rather than your body, too afraid to move and bring forth a new wave of pain.

His eyes scrunched up and then opened, surprised. "You're awake?"

He sat in the bed and helped you into a sitting position, bringing a gentle hand to your cheek as if you were going to break at any second. "How do you feel, (Y/N)?" He picked up a glass of water and brought it to your lips. "Are you ready? The doctor is already here. We had him explain everything to Vanderwood so you don't need to worry about protecting your identity. We'll have the doctor on standby in case something goes wrong, but for the most part, Vanderwood will administer the-"

"My identity? Why would my identity need to be protected?" You asked.

Saeyoung looked away. "Let's talk about that when the Elixir is out of your system. We still don't know what it's doing to your mind."

The redhead extended an arm toward you, and you took it, allowing him to guide you toward a room you had never been in—Vanderwood's.

You poked your head in, surprised. The sheets had been changed and a tarp had been placed over the floor, the entire room converted into a makeshift hospital. There were several large pieces of equipment, and Vanderwood stood in the middle of it all, his hair pulled back into a low ponytail and his hands gloved. He pulled a surgical mask over his face. "Sit on the bed," He instructed.

You hesitated.

The only time you'd even come close to being in a hospital was when your orphanage had handed you off to a pediatrician's clinic for a week, and the worst of the machinery there was the needles they used to draw blood.

"What are you going to do?" You asked, not moving from your place.

"We'll filter the Elixir out of your blood. It's a pretty simple process...your blood goes into the machine and back into you. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing. The doctor didn't give us any anesthetic, though, so..." Vanderwood nodded toward Saeyoung. "You should stay here with her, Lucie- erm, Saeyoung. This might hurt."

The redhead nodded, gently pushing you toward the bed, giving you a soft kiss on the forehead when you'd finally laid down on it. Knowing that he'd be with you the whole time made you feel a little better. Surprisingly, the fact that there would be no anesthetic didn't scare you much. After your primary and secondary commitments, and then having the Elixir directly in your bloodstream, you had built your tolerance for pain up. When Vanderwood made the first cuts into your skin, you barely felt the scalpel as it pierced your skin. 

Saeyoung squeezed your hand.

You thought about telling him you were be fine, but then realized that if you did...he'd pull his hand away. In all honesty, the thought of him doing that disturbed you more than the notion of pain, so you kept your lips shut and squeezed his palm back with a small smile.

Interestingly enough, your mental state had stabilized a bit between when you first were injected with the Elixir and now. Originally, the pain was so unbearable you could do little other than groan and shake, but it was as if your body had built grown accustomed to the pain. _Is that a good thing, though?_

You turned your head away as Vanderwood began pulling back the skin on your arm, easily grossed out by blood.

"Does it hurt?" Saeyoung asked, worry written on his normally relaxed face.

You chuckled. "Not as much as you probably think. I can handle this much." You flashed him a grin, as if that would prove your words, but Saeyoung still looked nervous.

He was about to respond when Vanderwood interrupted the two of you.

"Alright, everything's set up," The brunette took a step back and began removing his surgical gloves. "All we need to do is wait for the machine to filter your blood over the next few hours. Saeyoung, just monitor the numbers on the screen, and if you think something looks even a little wrong, make sure you tell me so that I-"

"I know, Vanderwood," Saeyoung said, chuckling. "I've helped you with medical missions before."

Vanderwood sighed, running a hand through his hair. Even he had his eyebrows scrunched up a little more than usual. You smiled. _He cares about me more than he lets on_ , you realized.

He grumbled in protest, but Saeyoung ushered him out of the room.

"He acts all indifferent about you, but he he has a soft spot for you, ya know?" Saeyoung blurted the second the man was gone.

You grinned, having reached the same conclusion only seconds before. "Yeah," you mused.

"Everyone in your life cares about you, (Y/N). I hope you know that," Saeyoung mumbled, getting serious once more.

You bit your lip.

There were certainly exceptions to that. MC seemed to hate your guts, V (kind as he was) knew about the hostage trade and didn't stop Saeyoung. The Savior obviously resented you, and perhaps worst of all, you still had no news of Saeran.

Would the boy always think you had abandoned him? That you had never cared and that it was all a lie?

You could bear the thought of the others hating you, but no matter what happened...Saeran would always hold a special place in your heart.

"I want..." You began, unsure of how to communicate your desires. "I want to talk to Saeran."

Saeyoung's eyes widened, but you went on before he could say anything.

"You...You said he was here. At the cabin. I've been wanting to speak to him but," You laughed softly, but not in humor. "But I don't think he feels the same. I haven't seen him once since...since getting the injection."

Saeyoung's eyes rounded in surprise. "(Y/N), I promise you, Saeran doesn't feel like that. You've been awake for less than an hour in total over the past two days, so you might not have noticed, but he's checked on you every day. Even when I was with you, he came in and asked about your vitals and if you'd been drinking water and if-"

"Really?"

What Luciel said brought you so much hope.

You'd thought that your relationship with Saeran was unsalvageable. That with all the wrongs you had done against him and all the ways he had wronged you, he'd still be bitter.

For years now, he's been your closest friend, and often the only person to stand by you without fail. The past two months had been disastrous, a special circle in hell crafted just for you, but that didn't change the fact that Saeran and you had a history together.

And you were willing to do as much as was necessary to make sure that your friendship didn't go to waste.

"Should I bring him in?" Saeyoung offered, seeing the new light in your eyes.

You nodded your head and began mentally preparing yourself for what you'd say.

Barely thirty seconds passed before the twins were before you again, and as you stared at the two, you wondered why you hadn't realized earlier that they were related.

Truly two sides to the same coin, they were copies of each other, the only differences being the stark contrast in hair color and eye color. 

And the look of horror and pain on Saeran's face as he gazed down at you.

"Saeran, you're..." Saeyoung murmured softly, not willing to complete the sentence that you all knew the answer to.

_Crying_.

You watched for the first time ever as silent tears ran down Saeran's cheeks. He'd never been this vulnerable in front of you. _Never_.

"Don't..." Saeran began, the word sounding raw and shaky. "Don't look."

He took a step back, and you thought he was going to leave the room, but he simply hit the light switch and the room darkened. The only light source was the computer monitor which displayed your vitals, something that wouldn't be shut off any time soon.

The sound of sniffling filled the room, and you found yourself at a loss for words.

"(Y/N), I..." Saeran began. "I'm so sorry."

In that moment, you wanted to rip the tube out of your arm and run to the boy, hug him and hold him and cry with him. Instead, you bit your lip 

"Saeran..." You said, not sure where to begin. But the boy took your hesitation for anger.

"No, (Y/N), you don't have to say anything. I understand if you never want to see me again. Everything that happened was my fault, if only I could have been stronger, none of this would hav-"

"Saeran." Your eyes widened.

You had been the one who opened your mouth to interrupt, but Saeyoung had beaten you to it.

"Saeran, don't blame yourself," The older twin murmured. You couldn't see it, but you had no doubt that Saeyoung was hugging Saeran. "You were under the Elixir. I saw you. If you had enough in your system to be vomiting blue afterward, then there's no way you can be blamed for what your mind tricked you into doing."

You frowned, surprised by this revelation. "You...you were under the Elixir?"

The boy didn't respond, but his silence was an answer in itself.

You let out a sigh of relief. "How...how long, Saeran?"

You heard Saeyoung nudge him, and Saeran finally responded. "The Savior began giving me higher doses around the same time MC joined the Mint Eye. It doesn't excuse what I've done, (Y/N), I know that, and I'm so..."

You let Saeran ramble for a moment, giving him the opportunity to apologize when he didn't need to.

_He was on the Elixir_ , you thought, the revelation giving you hope. _Every time he ignored me and hurt me...it wasn't out of free will. It was all the Elixir._

It was a cruel liquid, the Elixir of Salvation.

The Savior used it for everything. She used it to brainwash disciples who questioned her authority. She used it to convince believers into believing in the magenta. She used it as a test during Primary and Secondary commitment. She used it to torture those she thought deserved punishing.

_How many times did she give Saeran the Elixir?_ You wondered, slowly beginning to understand why he had looked at you with blank eyes so many times. Eyes are windows to the soul. When he cared for you and loved you, you saw affection in his eyes. When he was angry or disappointed, you saw the frustration in his eyes.

Over the past two months, though...his eyes had been blank. As if his mind were possessed by something else entirely. In your desperate search for answers as to why Saeran suddenly seemed to hate you, you had assumed that the blankness on his face was a product of his anger to you but now, you realized that the whole time, it was the Elixir.

Even when he injected you with the Elixir, it had been a decision reached under influence.

_That goddamn liquid_ , you thought, suddenly more worried for Saeran's health than anything else. If the boy was throwing up blue, something you hadn't done during even your secondary commitment, the Savior truly must have gone overboard.

"(Y/N), please...I won't ask you to forgive me but just..." Your ears perked up as you heard Saeran's broken voice continue. "Just please don't die. I've caused you so much pain...but if you die because of this I won't be able to handle it. I know I deserve the pain and the blame and the grief, but please...please."

You wanted the lights to be on. You wanted to look Saeran in the eye and tell him everything would be okay.

That you were already feeling better and your life was most likely no longer in danger.

But you knew he wouldn't believe you, so instead, you simply said, "Saeran, come here." The boy moved forward, standing a foot away from you, unsure.

But you didn't waste a moment in hesitation. You grabbed his hand and pulled him into your bed, right next to you, and embraced him.

It had been nearly two months since the two of you had this level of closeness, and that seemed to push Saeran over the edge. He returned the hug for a moment, resting his head in the crook of your neck before the tears began flowing from him all over again.

Saeyoung left the room, shutting the door quietly, leaving the two of you.

It was a peaceful moment.

No words needed to be said.

You closed your eyes and shushed him as he mumbled apology after apology, holding him close for what felt like the first time in forever.

There was still a lot to talk about. A lot. But for a moment, it really felt like everything would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.2k
> 
> Notes: Avatar: The Last Airbender is suchh a good show everyone should watch it
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 3/12/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	20. XX: Saeyoung's Route (Saeran)

Saeran never left (Y/N)'s side. As she slept, he tended to the machinery, monitoring her vitals and making sure she wasn't in any danger. He didn't allow himself to sleep and didn't allow himself to leave, denying all of Saeyoung's and Vanderwood's offers to watch (Y/N) as she rested.

The last time she trusted him to spend the night with her, he left in the morning. First thing.

Saeran wasn't about to make that mistake again.

"Sae...ran?" He heard a voice call from behind him.

The boy turned around in an instant, immediately smothering (Y/N) with attention and affection.

"You're up? Did you just wake up? How does your heart feel? Are you in any pain?" He asked, firing question after question at the poor girl. Only when he saw her struggling to respond did he slow down.

"Sorry," he said with his usual lazy grin. "Err, how do you feel?"

(Y/N) stared at him for a second, morning drowsiness still slowing her down a bit. "I feel..." She trailed off, before finding the words. "Good. Really good."

Saeran let out a sigh of relief when he saw her smile. He was terrified that the filter Vanderwood had found would be unsuccessful, that (Y/N) would have to live the rest of her life in agony because of that stupid injection. 

"Does anything hurt?" Saeran inquired, brushing a stray strand of hair out of (Y/N)'s face. He sat down on the bed and bit his lip.

(Y/N) thought for a moment. "Actually...no. Nothing. For the first time I'm," She grinned at Saeran. "I'm feeling good."

The two of them smiled at each other, both elated at the news. At long last, the two of them were free.

Saeran's pain had stopped when he threw up, his body expelling the liquid without prompt. Now that he knew (Y/N) was no longer in pain...it made him feel like there was finally a chance for things to go back to normal. For them to be happy again.

The boy smiled. "I'll call Saeyoung."

***

The five of them sat across each other in the cabin, comfortably spaced out across two couches and a lounging chair.

(Y/N) and Saeyoung sat on one couch, the white-haired girl leaning her shoulder ever so slightly on Saeyoung, while Saeran and Vanderwood sat a couple of feet away from them. With the dim light streaming in from the evening sun, the image seemed almost cozy: Vanderwood was sipping a cup of coffee quietly, (Y/N) and Saeyoung were smiling at each other in a shy but secretive manner. V, for once, had his sunglasses off, his teal-blue strands of hair scattered messily across his forehead in a lazy fashion. Even Saeran, who would usually be found glaring at someone or scowling in a corner, had a strangely relaxed expression on his face, not quite a smile but still far from a frown.

"We should talk," Vanderwood finally broke the silence after a long moment, "About what we're going to do next."

V sighed. It was clear the man knew this was coming. "You're right," He began. "The Mint Eye is too dangerous to be left alone. From what (Y/N) has told us, it's only growing larger, and bolder as well."

Saeran bit his lip.

He understood the implications behind what V was suggesting.

And it seemed that Saeyoung did too.

"V, no." The redhead said, stiffening.

"We can't...we can't just walk away. Someone has to do something, and as it stands, we're likely the only people who have a chance." V said, taking a breath. "I sent MC back to the city. She'll meet up with Yoosung and Zen...and she'll probably live with Jaehee for the time being. It's too unsafe in Rika's apartment. Jumin will keep the three of them out of trouble, but...we can't just run away. We have to do something about the Mint Eye."

"All of us, is what you're saying?" Vanderwood asked, the question more of a statement than anything else.

Saeran clenched his fist. He watched as his brother placed a comforting hand over the (Y/N)'s trembling palm. He was surprised. Were they...involved? The notion didn't bother him much, comforting him as he realized that two people he cared most about would be protecting each other.

The pale boy pulled his gaze upward and looked at (Y/N). The Elixir had been removed from her system this morning, the machine taken out of her arm just hours ago. But her hair was still white, and the color was still sapped from her skin after so much forced consumption of the blue fluid. She already would never be able to forget her time in the Mint Eye—with the tattoo on her back and her eyes forever mint green.

The boy frowned, remembering how _he_ had inflicted all that pain on her.

A familiar sensation of guilt bubbled in Saeran's stomach as he recalled the details of (Y/N)'s secondary commitment, and how cruel he had been to her afterward. He couldn't help but wonder: _Is this...my chance to atone for everything I've done?_

"We can't all go," Saeran blurted. "I've been thinking a lot about how to infiltrate the Mint Eye and take it down from the inside...but it's a plan that will require a lot of time. And only a few people. Five is too many for a delicate task like this."

"You sure you want to do this?" Vanderwood chuckled darkly, catching on to what Saeran was suggesting. The elder man acted nonchalant as he asked the question, but Saeran saw the slightly pained look in his eyes.

Despite never truly having talked before, Saeran realized that Vanderwood was more like him than he'd realized. _He's probably done something like this before, too._ Saeran looked at the brunette male and studied the expression the man was wearing. _Does he regret it?_

All signs pointed to yes: That Saeran's idea was a bad one, that he'd live his life regretting ever saying the following words.

But if Saeran could protect (Y/N) _and_ his brother, nothing would stop him.

Even if it ruined him in the process. 

Saeran took a breath in, his decision made. "We have to split up. Three of us infiltrate the Mint Eye. Two of us stay back. I already have a plan." He said, before adding, "And I already know which of us should go ahead." 

"Saeran..." His brother whispered, catching on. But Saeran paid him no heed.

"Vanderwood, V, and me. The three of us will infiltrate and bring the Savior down. You...you two should go." He said. "You'd only be a burden." Saeran added the last part coldly, hoping that if he was rude, then (Y/N) and Saeyoung might be more willing to leave him.

But Saeyoung knew his brother too well to find offense in his words. "Saeran, I'm not leaving you again. We've been apart for _half a fucking decade_ , you can't expect me to abandon you again!"

"Just for a short while, Saeyoung. I'll be back...soon. I need this. For closure. I can't live the rest of my life knowing that the Mint Eye is out there, lurking in the shadows."

"So let us help you!" Saeyoung continued, now standing. "I don't want to lose you again, Saeran, I won't—"

Saeyoung was silenced when Saeran and hugged him.

It was their second hug since reuniting, and perhaps the first hug Saeran had ever initiated with Saeyoung in all of his life. "I don't want to lose you, either," Saeran whispered into his brother's ear. "But that's why I'll come back. You need to stay, though. Not just for me or for you, but...for (Y/N)."

Saeran pulled back, unable to meet his brother's desperate eyes.

He had to do this.

"How long will it be?" Saeyoung murmured. "How long before you come back?"

Saeran looked away, not wanting to confess that the plan forming in his mind was one that would be long-term. "For this to work...for us to take the Mint Eye out forever, and never let it rise back up, we can't just go in and bomb everything. We have to take it out at its root, we have to—"

"How long, Saeran?" Saeyoung repeated, interrupting his brother's tangent.

"I have to regain Rika's trust." Saeran rambled on, unwilling to answer the question. "I need to attain a high role in the Mint Eye once more, and she needs to genuinely believe that I'm on her side, and—"

(Y/N) grabbed Saeran's arm, halting the boy's words with her touch.

"Saeran...how long?" She whispered.

Saeran took a deep breath in. "2 years. At the minimum."

The girl's mouth dropped open, shocked at the duration of this mission. Even Saeyoung looked mortified, never having been on a mission that lasted longer than two months.

Next to them, Vanderwood sighed. "The real missions are the ones that last this long. The Mint Eye has long been on the agency's list of targeted groups...If I eliminate the Mint Eye, it'll be as a job. I'll inform the boss that I've taken this as a mission. For me...it'll just be work. I'm guessing Saeran's already up to the task. But V, are you in or out? 2 years was a generous estimate; expect longer."

V didn't waste a moment in standing up and agreeing to the mission.

The three men glanced at each other and nodded their heads. Without having even discussed a plan, they were all in agreement.

"Saeyoung...I'll tell the agency that you're with me on this mission. I'm lying for you, so you need to be twice as careful. I want you to..." Vanderwood halted his statement and glanced at (Y/N). "I want you to take her and keep her safe. Stay in hiding. Assume everyone is an enemy. We don't know whether Rika will be looking for (Y/N) or not. Listen to me now: As your handler, this is the mission I'm assigning you until I return."

With that, Vanderwood turned and began walking into V's room. He didn't turn his head when Saeyoung protested. V soon followed, bidding (Y/N) and Saeyoung farewell, giving them car keys and a map to bring them back to the city.

Soon, all that was left were Saeran, Saeyoung, and (Y/N).

"I'll be back," Saeran said, confident. He couldn't possibly be sure if those words were the truth or not, but he wouldn't let his brother doubt him.

"You better," The redhead said, acting tough even though tears were forming in his eyes.

(Y/N) took a step forward and hugged Saeran, burying her face in his chest as he looked down at her. Slowly, he returned the embrace, finding comfort in the fact that once this was all over, he would be able to look her in the eye once more and not feel guilty.

"Go," he whispered. "The sun is setting."

They left the house slowly, taking as much time as possible, but Saeran didn't stay to watch. He wouldn't let them see his weakness. _And so the two brothers are separated once more_ , Saeran thought bitterly.

Saeyoung would have to go back to being Luciel for the time being, while Saeran stayed with Vanderwood and V to take down the Mint Eye. _Luciel...of all the names he could have picked_ , Saeran mused, chuckling at the thought as he approached the door Vanderwood and V were behind.

The moment he had heard the name, Saeran had searched for the definition. Both he and his brother were methodical, neither one of them doing anything at random. There was a reason behind the name 'Luciel', Saeran knew, and he grew obsessed with finding it.

When he learned that it meant the _Light of God_ , the boy was unsurprised. Though he himself had stopped believing in the idea of there being a higher power, his brother clung to those values, his belief never faltering.

_How fitting_ , Saeran thought with a soft smile, _That Luciel, the light of God, has found an angel to love him_.

Because that's what (Y/N) was.

An angel.

He smiled when he thought about the prospect of (Y/N) and Saeyoung being together.

Saeran had never found himself to be capable of love. After Saeyoung first abandoned him (though he now knew it was more complicated than just that), Saeran had so much hate in his heart that he resigned himself to never open it to love again.

(Y/N) changed that a little bit, but no matter how Saeran loved her, it would never be the passionate, romantic love that she deserved.

_Saeyoung can give that to her_ , he realized, smiling. _Everything she deserves, and more._

He opened the door, turning to V and Vanderwood. He would never forget the final thought that ran through his mind:

_Even if I never return._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.1k
> 
> Notes: wHy dO sCHoOls MaKE iT iMpoSsiBLe tO gET sLEeP i jUsT wANt tO gET eiGHt cOnSeCUtiVE hOUrS iS tHaT so MuCH tO aSk fOR
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/16/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	21. XXI: Saeyoung's Route (Saeyoung)

The first year was the worst. But it was also the best.

After driving back from the Mint Eye, Saeyoung felt numb. He had come so close to being fully reunited with his brother. The two of them had smiled together and laughed and joked and things had _finally_ been normal for the Choi twins—as normal as things could get, with the whirlwind of chaos the Mint Eye had brought to their lives.

Initially, Saeyoung had only thought of his own loss as he pressed harder on the gas pedal, with (Y/N) been silent, not saying a word. But after he'd calmed himself a bit more, he saw her shoulders trembling and realized, with a start, that she would perhaps miss the pale-haired boy as much as he did.

Saeyoung had been apart from his brother for four years, which was why it felt so much worse to have had a taste or reunion and then be forced into separation. But (Y/N) had _been_ with Saeran for all that time, developing a strange manifestation of feelings for the boy.

While it was a second parting for the redhead, this would be the first time (Y/N) was separated from Saeran.

And neither of them knew when he would return.

 _Or if he'll return_ , a small voice whispered in Saeyoung's head, which he ignored.

That, perhaps, was why the first year back in Seoul initially seemed like it would be so horrible. Neither Saeyoung nor (Y/N) could forget about Saeran, both of them miserable and in grief over the fact that they had lost the boy once more.

But after a few months, when the grief wasn't as strong and wasn't as frequent, they began looking at each other. And it was around this time that they began truly _seeing_ each other. It was at this point in time that their impassioned kisses now had traces of something else, something sweet and tender and beautiful.

They began falling in love.

From the second day they had been under the same roof, the two of them had kissed and hugged and relished in each other's presence.

But true love, Saeyoung learned, ran deeper than physical affection.

A shrill scream rang throughout the house, coming straight from the kitchen. Saeyoung sprinted there, jumping over furniture and couches to reach his target destination with the maximum efficiency. A dozen different thoughts raced through his mind, desperately trying to determine what could have made (Y/N) scream with such ferocity.

"I'm here!" He shouted, barging into the kitchen, only to see (Y/N) standing in front of an empty fridge.

"We're out of Ph.D. Pepper!" She exclaimed, gesturing wildly at the lack of the sugary soda in the fridge that was usually stocked.

Saeyoung gasped, taking the matter very seriously.

"Whatever shall we do, my princess?" He inquired, stroking a nonexistent beard as he considered the possible courses of action. "Fear not! Saeyoung, your defender of justice and knight in shining armor is here to save the day! TO THE SUPERMARKET!" He exclaimed dramatically.

(Y/N) sighed and strolled lazily to the living room, plopping herself down on the sofa. "We can't go to the supermarket, Saeyoung," she grumbled, flicking him. "It'll risk our identities being leaked."

The realization dawned upon Saeyoung, and he then understood why her reaction had been so... _dramatic_. He sat across from his lover, hating the frown that was now deeply etched across her face when a mischievous solution came to his mind.

"Indeed, Saeyoung Choi and (F/N) (L/N) cannot risk their identities being leaked...but I specialize as a secret agent." The redhead winked. "Give me ten minutes to raid your closet and the person you'll see will be completely different!"

(Y/N) coughed, not quite believing Saeyoung, but that only strengthened his resolve to utterly change his appearance.

Saeyoung winked, kissing her playfully on the cheek before disappearing into his room. It took him just shy of ten minutes to steal (Y/N)'s clothes and change into them, placing a wig over his head and doing a little twirl for the girl in front of him as he introduced himself as 'Ms. Ho-Syun Chua'.

Half-expecting (Y/N) to roll her eyes, the girl instead looked delighted. "Not bad, Saeyoung. But I can do better," (Y/N) smirked. She pecked Saeyoung lightly on the lips before disappearing into his own quarters. He waited with a smile on his face, eager to see what she'd be wearing when she returned, and nearly died when she returned with a sexy smirk, her hair covered in a cap and dressed so stylishly that Saeyoung had to question whether truly found that outfit in his closet.

Though her natural hair color was growing back in at its roots, it was mostly covered up by her cap and in her playful attire, she looked like a younger version of Zen.

Much sexier, though.

It was little things like that, the way she bounced back jokes at him and how she took it as a personal challenge to drink more Ph.D. Pepper than him, which made Saeyoung begin to fall for her.

And not just in a basic, teenage-romance way but in the most heartfelt way Saeyoung had ever known.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He'd asked one night as they ate dinner together, debating whether Toph or Bumi would win in an all-out fight. He'd wanted to ask the _"What are we'_ question at first, but had decided to cut straight to the brunt of it when the moment befell him. "I know our situation is weird, but you're so perfect and beautiful and—"

"Yes," (Y/N) had said, silencing him, not a moment of hesitation in her voice.

And then she'd kissed him harder than she'd ever kissed him before, all talk of dinner and TV shows forgotten.

After that, Saeyoung just fell harder and harder for her.

He had been forced to disconnect his bunker from the network out of necessary caution to hide any indication that people were living in the home. As such, the two had been forced to rely exclusively on pre-downloaded materials from Saeyoung's various computers, which seemed like a lot at first, but as six months grew into twelve, the amount of fresh content seemed to be less and less, until there was none left at all.

Despite the evident lack of things to do, though, Saeyoung rarely found himself bored. (Y/N) truly was all he needed.

And so, the first year was just that: love lost but found again, a year devoid of Saeran but instead filled with (Y/N). It was the absolute worst, with Saeyoung never having missed his brother as much as he did in that year, but simultaneously the best, because he had the girl of his dreams.

After that, life was a blur.

To Saeyoung, there was only (Y/N).

And to (Y/N), there was only Saeyoung.

After the second year together passed, Saeyoung couldn't hold back any longer.

"Are you happy?" Saeyoung asked one night.

The two of them were in bed, (Y/N) about to fall asleep after intense lovemaking, but the question weighed on Saeyoung's mind too heavily for him to wait until morning.

"Hm?" (Y/N) mumbled, awake but not fully alert.

"Are you," Saeyoung began, sitting up in bed. "Are you happy?"

Next to him, (Y/N) rubbed the drowsiness from her eyes and sat up next to him. "Of course, Saeyoung. Why wouldn't I be?"

The redhead bit his lip. "It's been...two years."

He didn't say what the 'it' was, but he didn't have to. She was all too aware of that fact, and they'd both been tracking how long Saeran, Vanderwood, and V had been gone. "This isn't what life is supposed to be like. You have your whole life ahead of you and...I don't want to keep you chained here like a prisoner. "

(Y/N) chuckled, bringing her hand to Saeyoung's cheek and kissing his jaw.

"In all the time I've been here with you, I've never once felt like a prisoner."

"I know. But..." Saeyoung trailed off. "I don't want this to be the rest of our lives. We don't know when they'll return, and when they do, we don't know what our lives will be like."

"What are you saying, Saeyoung?" (Y/N) asked earnestly.

"(Y/N), I've been thinking a lot about this and there's so much I don't know...except for one thing." Saeyoung turned his body and looked at (Y/N). In the darkness, he could barely see more than the scant outline of her body, but he didn't want to ruin the moment.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, (Y/N)." He said.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, too," She responded, giggling.

Saeyoung bit his lip, thankful for his decision to leave the lights off. His face was on fire, and (Y/N)'s innocent lack of awareness as to what he was trying to say wasn't helping.

He took her to hands and placed them inside his own, taking a deep breath, preparing himself for the worst. Hoping for the best.

"(Y/N), will you marry me?"

Saeyoung heard her breath catch, a soft gasp of what he hoped was happiness.

For a second, she didn't say anything, and Saeyoung felt his stomach sink. Then, her lips were on his, the girl's petite frame pushing him down onto the bed with her on top of him. "Saeyoung, yes," She murmured between kisses, bringing her hands to his face. "I want to marry you."

Saeyoung let out a sigh of relief and wrapped his arms around the girl's body, holding her close. As (Y/N) peppered kisses down his neck, whispering a soft "Yes" every time her lips left his skin, the boy couldn't keep himself from grinning. Everything after was a product of passion, and Saeyoung wasted no time in flipping (Y/N) over for a second round of what had left them so naked and intimate in the first place.

It wasn't until much later that the two of them actually discussed the details of the wedding.

Saeyoung wanted to get married in a spaceship, he had decided, but after calling KARI, the Korean Aerospace Development Association, he was bluntly informed that no, such a thing would not be possible.

One of their biggest arguments had actually been about the location of the wedding. Saeyoung had stated that he wanted to get married in a church, but (Y/N) blatantly refused, telling her fiance that churches reminded her of the house of worship within the Mint Eye, a cruel place she was often sent to for punishment.

As a sort of stubborn compromise, they agreed that they would decide when the time came, much later.

Of course, like all previous arguments, it was quickly forgotten over binging Honey Buddha Chips and watching cartoons together.

One thing that could never be forgotten, though, was Saeran.

Saeyoung loved (Y/N), he truly did. Unlike others, he had found her and _chosen_ to love her, only growing further entranced by her spell as he got to know her.

But Saeran was his other half. His soul was incomplete without his brother, and the two were tied not just by blood but by the hell they had both endured together growing up.

More than once, Saeyoung mused over how, if he could just have the slightest intimation on where Saeran was, whether he was even alive or not, it would give him so much comfort.

 _I wish twins could communicate telepathically_ , the redhead thought as he lazed on the couch.

(Y/N) was in her room, probably taking a nap. Neither of them had anything to do, as usual, so Saeyoung began thinking that he might explore the culinary realm. Barely a week after returning to the bunker, he'd made more chocolate chip cookies for (Y/N) than either of them knew what to do with and had been repeating that pattern every now and then, but trying something new might be interesting.

He pulled himself from the couch. _How about a Ph D. Pepper pie with a Honey Buddha Chip crust?_ Saeyoung nodded to himself. That sounded like a good idea.

He was about to enter the kitchen when he heard a high-pitched beeping play from some piece of equipment on the ceiling.

"Saeyoung?" (Y/N) asked, by his side in an instant. "What's that sound?" She asked while covering her ears.

"The carbon monoxide alarm," Saeyoung responded plainly.

"What?!" She grabbed his arm. "We have to get out of here!"

"A-ah, no, I mean..." Saeyoung gathered his thoughts.

Within the first month of moving back into the bunker with (Y/N), Saeyoung had disconnected any electronics he thought were at risk for giving up their presence. As a security measure, though, he had wired the intruder alarm to the carbon monoxide alarm, mechanically setting it up so that if someone was at the front gates, the alarm would go off.

"I rewired it to only go off when there's someone at the gates," Saeyoung finally said. He stood on a chair and silenced the alarm, gazing hesitantly down the hall.

"Someone at the gates?" (Y/N) asked. "That could be..."

_Saeran._

The two of them didn't even look at each other, their minds to in sync with one another. The couple stumbled to the door, equally fearful of what they would find, all thoughts and brain processing systems a jumble.

Who would they find outside the gates? Would it be Saeran, returned at last? _Or will it be V and Vanderwood, saying that he didn't make it?_ Saeyoung wondered, desperately praying that wouldn't be the case.

He paused in front of the door, hesitating with (Y/N) as the two of them mentally prepared themselves for how their lives might change. The redhead felt his fiancée wrap her hand in his, giving it a squeeze before twisting the doorknob and opening the door.

And there, in the distance, three figures could be spotted barely one-hundred feet away.

The first man, a brown-haired man in a black and purple suit, with a muscled arm shaking the barred gate.

The second was a tall gentleman dressed in all black and sunglasses, the only spot of color on his body being his bright blue hair.

And the third: an all-too-familiar man in a leather jacket, with hair so fiery red it's only rival was Saeyoung's own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.4k
> 
> Notes: WOAH GUYS I complained in my last chapter that I wasn't getting enough sleep AND MY PRAYER WAS HEARD 0_0 All my classes are now online and most of my extracurricular activities are canceled, so I'm getting 10 hours every night! On the downside, the reason everything's cancelled is because of Corona ::/ I hope that all of you and your families are healthy and safe, and I'll see you in the next chapter :)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/19/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	22. XXII: Saeyoung's Route (Y/N)

You had never sprinted so fast in your life.

It was a short distance, but you jumped as you grew close, throwing yourself at Saeran, hugging him through the gates.

By some miracle, the boy caught you, wrapping his arms around you and held you tight as you sobbed in relief.

The sense of catharsis when you saw his face was unlike anything you'd ever felt in your life. For three years, you'd been waiting for his return with Saeyoung. In that period, it felt like time had halted for you so that, at Saeran's return, the three of you would be able to move forward _together_.

On your left, you heard Saeyoung frantically undoing the padlock he had placed on the gate, ripping it off the second it was open.

Everything after that point was a blur. The five of you wound up in the bunker once more, no one commenting on how untidy the living room was with everyone being _so damn happy_ to see each other.

V and Vanderwood stayed off to the side, talking among themselves as you embraced Saeran. Again. For days to follow, you would find it difficult to leave the boy's side, so relieved that he was back. Relieved that he was with you. Relieved that he was _alive_ , and that you could hug him and kiss his cheek and feel him.

"Take your jacket off, Saeran!" You exclaimed, pulling the leather off him.

"A-ah, let's leave it on for now," Saeran mumbled, looking away. You realized there was something he wasn't telling you, but in the moment, you couldn't bring yourself to care, only hugging him tighter.

It was practically a full hour before anyone thought to ask _what_ _exactly_ the other group had been doing.

When all five of you were settled on two couches (there were far more in the spacious room, but you and Saeyoung refused to apart from Saeran, even in the living room), Vanderwood asked what you and Saeyoung had been doing.

"There's really not much to tell there," Saeyoung said, chuckling.

You found yourself agreeing with him, realizing that, objectively speaking, the two of you hadn't done much in the three years you'd been hiding from society.

"Except, of course," Saeyoung flashed a grin at you, "We got engaged."

You felt a flood of happiness rush through your body, still getting excited every time he said that or called you his fiancée.

"Told you so," Saeran said to Vanderwood, flashing him a lazy grin. "You owe me one hundred thousand won."

The agent rolled his eyes in response, turning to Saeyoung once more. "You set a wedding date and venue, yet?"

"Well," Saeyoung chuckled hesitantly. "We were sort of just planning on getting married here at the bunker whenever Saeran came back."

"Oh?" Vanderwood said, arching an eyebrow. "I'm ordained. I could get you two married by tomorrow if you want."

No doubt, Vanderwood had said that as a joke. But at his words, your eyes immediately darted to Saeyoung's to gauge his reaction. You'd wanted to marry Saeyoung the night he'd asked you, but the two of you agreed that nothing would happen without word of Saeran.

But that period of waiting was brutal.

And now that Saeran was back, you didn't want to wait any longer.

"What do you say, (Y/N)?" Saeyoung asked, waggling his eyes in a joking manner. But you saw the hopeful tint in his eyes.

"Nothing in my life has ever been normal," You mused. "I don't see why my wedding should be any different." You leaned over and kissed Saeyoung, briefly but passionately.

"Are you two for real?" Vanderwood inquired, definitely not expecting his offer to be accepted. He groaned in annoyance, but you could tell wasn't actually irritated. Annoying as Saeyoung must have been, it was easy to miss the redhead when he was gone. "I was planning on making Saeyoung work tomorrow, but I guess I'll have to give him the day off."

Saeyoung pouted, about to pipe up with something that would doubtlessly irk his boss, but you opened your mouth before he could.

"So how did things go on your mission?"

The three men instantly looked at each other, eyes communicating words that would never be said aloud.

"The Mint Eye is gone," V started. "None of us need to worry about that ever again."

You and Saeyoung stayed silent, expecting more, but no one said anything else.

Saeyoung coughed awkwardly. "Anything else you want to tell us?"

"You know better than anyone else here that agents never talk about some of the things they have to do on missions," Vanderwood blurted, crossing his arms. "All that matters is that our mission was a success."

"Okay," Saeyoung said, understanding. "But tell me this. Why won't Saeran take off his jacket?"

In that instant, all eyes in the room darted to the second redhead, who shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"Saeran," Vanderwood said with a softness in his voice that you'd never seen from him before. "They'll see it eventually."

Saeran looked at V, then at Vanderwood, and then back at V, as if looking for something in their eyes that he never found. Finally, he sighed and began pulling his jacket off. When he dropped it on the ground in front of you, you had sucked your breath in, surprised at the image before you.

Sitting on his left, you knew that his right arm would be tattooed with the emblem of the Mint Eye. But directly in front of you, on Saeran's left arm, was the very same tattoo copied over but expanded over his entire arm, with new, foreign patterns trailing down to his fingertips.

You were so preoccupied with the artwork on his arm that you almost didn't look up. And then, you did.

Mostly covered by his red tank top, the boy's neck was discolored by stray whip marks and bruises that had yet to heal. You looked away, trying not to picture how scarred and ruined the boy's back must be, horrified when you realized that Rika had been far from merciful on him when he'd returned.

He opened his mouth to say something but you silenced him with another hug, one given not to satisfy your endless desire to hug him but one for _his_ sake, so that you could comfort him. Three years, he'd been without you. And you had to make up for it.

Next to you two, Saeyoung stayed silent and bit his lip. "You've been through hell and come back," he whispered to Saeran. "I'm never letting you go again."

For once, Saeran smiled. Not a lazy half-smile or even a forced grin, but a genuine smile where the boy wrapped an arm around his brother in a strange imitation of a hug as if to say _I missed you_.

You didn't dare ask what Saeran had been through, not now, at least. You knew that there would come a time for that much further in the future. For now, it was simply enough to be together again.

"You're going to be living here with us," Saeyoung said, not even giving Saeran an option. "Vanderwood and V...I don't know what you guys had to do to take down the Mint Eye, but whatever happened must have forced the three of you to trust each other pretty hard. Shit's going to be tough in the bunker...and kind of weird. But you guys can stay for as long as you want. Saeran is my family and...I guess after three years with him, you're his family too. You're welcome here."

"That's a kind sentiment, Saeyoung, but I think I should head out. I need to speak with Jumin about the events that transpired." V mumbled, smiling softly through his sunglasses.

"Aw, come on!" Saeyoung groaned. "At least stay till tomorrow, won't you? You should be here for the wedding."

"You guys were being serious about that?"

"Of course," Saeyoung whispered, kissing you on the cheek. "We're going to have Saeran walk her down the aisle...or, the hall, I guess. And, oh, Vanderwood can be my best man!"

"Oh! Does that mean V will get to be my maid-of-honor?" You asked, giggling.

The blue-haired man was abashed, stuttering out incoherent syllables as the five of you laughed together for the first time, finally free from the past.

The Mint Eye was behind you now, the darkest part of your life finally sealed. You glanced at Saeyoung, your future husband, and Saeran, your greatest friend. No doubt, those two men would be with you for the rest of your life.

Things would be difficult. There were so many scars to heal—scars even deeper than the ones on Saeran's back.

But now that he'd returned, time could move onward once more, and you were ready to explore your future with the two of them by your side. It would be an unorthodox living situation, for sure. Times would get tough. But it would work out. Because it _had_ to.

After all, didn't the three of you at least deserve a happy ending? After all you'd been through, you would do anything for them.

There was no way you could have known that Saeyoung and Saeran were thinking the exact same things, but on that couch, the three of you solidified the emotions you'd been feeling for the past three years with a vow: to sacrifice anything and everything for the sake of each other.

And with that silent promise, the future was locked in place. No matter how fucked up the past was, it was gone now. Left behind.

The future would be different.

The future would be better.

And now that the three of you were finally together, your shared future could finally begin.

_Fin._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.8k
> 
> Notes: And with that, Saeyoung's route is complete! But, dear readers, his life with (Y/N) and Saeran has only just begun. My book is titled Where Futures Begin because this is where it starts, this is where shit finally gets better for these precious characters. Their future is different. It's better. I won't write the fluffy, fun stuff because I wanted to show the journey that got them there (and if you really want to read some stuff like that, there are soo many fanfics already based around that idea). 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the ride, and I thank you for staying with me to the end~ but it's not the final conclusion because next up, we have Saeran's route! Let me know what you thought about this route and give me feedback (good and bad!) so that when I write Saeran's route, it's even better! I'm going to give myself a break so I won't update next Monday like I usually do, but instead one week from now on Thursday - so drop a comment and tell me your thoughts! I'll see you soon with Saeran ;)
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/26/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	23. XVII: Saeran's Route (Y/N)

Physical pain was familiar to you.

At this point, it was like an annoying friend that you never wished to speak with or see again, but always seemed to cross paths with you. You had hated it at first, resented and feared the very thought of an Elixir forcing your body through that kind of torture: but now, you had honestly grown used to it.

Sad, isn't it?

But perhaps what was sadder was the fact that while you could finally handle physical pain, your heart simply couldn't take the emotional stress anymore.

Despite having taken the Elixir into your bloodstream, you managed to retain consciousness. You weren't sure if that was a blessing or a curse, because even though your physical pain seemed to shrink with each passing second, the heavy weight on your heart felt like it was suffocating you.

 _When did it all go wrong?_ You wondered.

Just two months ago, your life had been as perfect as could be.

You had Saeran. Saeran had you. There was never any intimation of anything going wrong. The two of you had almost kissed, that one night so long ago, the very day you found out that you were to be raised to the Savior's inner council.

Life had been good. Life had been happy. _We had been happy_ , you mused.

If only you could erase the past two months...then things could go back to the way they were before.

_Saeran's fingers ran through your hair like dolphins cutting through water, smooth and unobstructed._

_The day was a slow one at the Mint Eye: Saeran had met with the Savior early in the morning and had finished his work off before you had even been awake, and all disciples had been given the day off after a particularly successful recruitment ceremony._

_For once, your schedules had overlapped so that the two of you were free at the same time._

_Under normal circumstances, Saeran would have pulled you off to the flower garden and the two of you would have spent your afternoon talking and watering flowers. But the weather had taken a turn for the worse, and it was now leading into the third day of thunderstorms._

_See, it wasn't that either of you were scared of thunder, but the constant booms were amplified by the dome structure of the greenhouse garden. Simply put, the roaring sounds made conversation impossible._

_And so the two of you sat in your room, not quite talking about anything but instead simply enjoying each other's presence._

_At times like this, that was all you needed._

_"Are you going to do anything with my hair, or will you just play with it?" You asked Saeran, giggling as a light blush crept onto his cheeks._

_"I-I thought you were asleep!" Saeran exclaimed, startled._

_That was fair. You had been lying on his lap for the past half hour with your eyes closed, never saying a word. There was small surprise in the fact that Saeran had assumed you were asleep. Still, though, you would never back out of an opportunity to tease the white-haired male._

_"Never assume, Saeran," You told the boy with a wink. "Girls are filled with secrets."_

_You pulled yourself into a seated position and sat across from Saeran, barely a foot away from him._

_"Oh?" Saeran asked with a light smile. "And what secrets could you have, Princess?"_

_"I'll tell you if you catch me!" You jumped off the bed with an excited laugh._

_With that, you sprinted out of the room, making way for the kitchen. Saeran, faster and stronger than you, was hot on your tail, calling out and playfully berating you for getting a head start, but you kept pace._

_It was hard to believe that two seventeen-year-olds could act so innocent and carefree, truly like children. But under the protection of Mint Eye, it oft seemed like anything was possible. Though of course, even the Mint Eye had its fair share of solemnity._

_You darted around a corner, still sprinting at full speed, and nearly crashed into the golden-haired Savior herself._

_Forcing yourself to an immediate stop despite your intense speed (and perhaps defying the laws of physics in the process), you managed to halt just short of the woman._

_Saeran wasn't so lucky._

_Despite his efforts to slow himself down, he crashed ungracefully into your back, and the two of you fell to the floor in a tangled mess of limbs._

_Honestly, you could probably pinpoint that moment as the one where the Savior first took note of you. At the time, you had thought nothing of the interaction; after seeing Saeran, the Savior had simply raised an eyebrow at him and had continued walking._

_Immediately after she was out of earshot, though, Saeran wrapped his arms around your waist._

_"I caught you~" He teased playfully, and you could hear the smile in his voice._

_"No fair!" You exclaimed, initiating a passionate rant about how the only reason he had caught up to you was because you had stopped after you saw the Savior._

_"A deal is a deal," He murmured. "You promised that if I caught you, you'd tell me a secret! And even if luck was on my side, I did catch you. So cough up, Princess."_

_You groaned._

_In truth, you didn't even have a secret to tell him, you had just said that because you figured you could beat him in a race and then mess with him for a day or two about it. But, to his credit, he had caught you, even in there were other factors involved...at the very least, he deserved something._

_You took a sharp breath in, debating whether or not to tell him the thought that had been lurking at the back of your mind for the past few weeks._

_"So?" Saeran inquired once more. "What's your secret? C'mon, spill!"_

_The boy was getting impatient, and you were out of ideas._

_"Alright, alright. You really want to know?"_

_Saeran nodded his head, eager._

_"Okay...My secret is that I can tell the future!" You exclaimed._

_Saeran cocked his head to the side and raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Elaborate?" He asked, clearly caught off guard._

_"Well, I can tell my future, at least. See, I know exactly who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with," You whispered into Saeran's ear._

_The boy looked shyly at the ground. "Who?" He asked, even though he knew. No doubt, though, he wanted to hear it from your lips._

_You smirked._

_"You."_

_With that single word, his cheeks erupted in flames, each passing second only kindling the hot pink fire that spread across his face._

_It took a while before he was able to say anything that wasn't an incoherent stutter or choke, but Saeran finally mustered up the courage to get off the ground and help you up. In doing so, he smiled the rare and sweet smile you loved so much. "I guess you really can tell the future, then."_

That was the first of your many promises to spend the rest of your lives together. You and Saeran had made tens, no hundreds of pacts over the years to either never let each other go or to never let anyone be prioritized higher than each other.

But nearly every promise was broken within these past two months.

You felt tears pool in the corners of your eyes.

Reliving that memory had been a moment of happiness for you, but the ending left a bitter taste in your mouth. As the small droplets of your emotions slid down your cheeks, you wanted to move your hand to wipe them away but your entire body felt numb.

But to your surprise, the tears were wiped away by a soft handkerchief before they could reach the edges of your face. _Who's there?_ You wanted to scream, every sense in your body lit on fire with a sick sense of fear; fear that you couldn't move your own body and were simultaneously in the presence of what could very well be a stranger bearing you ill will.

Only when the supposed stranger spoke did your fear melt away, replaced with different emotions. Stronger emotions.

"Please don't cry, Princess." The voice whispered, and even in the man's quiet whisper, there was an undeniable fact that it was him.

 _Saeran_.

The sheer realization drew your eyes open, and you instantly locked eyes with the man who had been preoccupying your thoughts not a second earlier.

"(Y-Y/N)?" Saeran asked, eyes round, the softness from before lost in...what was that look in his eyes? Why was he staring at you with such a fearful gaze?

You pulled yourself up in the bed, struggling against the pain to face the man who'd never left your mind—not even for a minute—in these past two months.

"Don't get up," Saeran puffed the pillow underneath your head, nervously trying to make you fall back asleep, but you resisted. It took every ounce of strength you had to not give in and fall back into unconsciousness, but you needed answers.

_Now._

"Wha..." You coughed, voice hoarse. Even your tongue felt lopsided and dizzy as you tried to force words out. "What happened?"

You wanted your voice to be strong in front of Saeran, to prove to him that in spite of his cruelty toward you these past months, you'd managed to maintain your toughness. But with each passing second as his mint green eyes met your own, you felt your resolve shattering.

Your question seemed to shake Saeran, though. Your field of vision was narrow, with you too weak to focus on anything other than his eyes, but you saw him look away and down at the ground.

"I..." Your ears perked up as Saeran began speaking. "I forced the Elixir inside you," Saeran murmured, his voice low. You could hear the shame in his words, and it took all you had not to open your own mouth and tell him not to be upset but you _couldn't._ He's put you through so much pain, you owe it to yourself not to forgive him so easily.

 _I hate him,_ you thought, resentment tainting your thoughts bitter as Saeran continued to speak.

"I injected you with it, and it's been in your bloodstream for almost three hours."

_I hate him._

"I brought you here. Your blood's been circulating through this machine to filter the Elixir out, but..."

_I hate him._

"I don't know how long it will be before you're safe again."

_I hate him._

"I'm so sorry, (Y/N)."

_I hate him._

"There's no excuse for me."

 _I hate him_.

"But please, (Y/N). Please don't cry. Not on my account...no more. I can't bear to see you in any more pain...I can't..."

Saeran trailed off, rambling now. His apologies filled your ears and you tried to muster up all the anger you'd felt in these past two months of isolation and misery, directing them all at him.

"I'm sorry." 

You tried to ignore the way his voice cracked as he apologized. _I hate him,_ you told yourself, as if repeating it would make it true.

"But please don't cry anymore."

You sighed, forcing yourself to meet Saeran's eyes. It was futile, you realized, trying to convince yourself that you hated the man you'd spent so many years with. Shared so many laughs with. Made so many memories with.

 _I love him_.

And no matter how you tried to convince yourself otherwise, be it repeating that you hate him in a mindless mantra or ignoring him for the rest of your life, that was the truth. And the truth would not change, not even if you wanted it to.

"Stop apologizing," You told Saeran, weakly. It took all your strength for those words to pass your lips, and Saeran must have known because at that request he quieted. "I..."

 _I forgive you_ , you wanted to tell him.

But reality was cruel, and you lost strength before you could finish your sentence. Blackness set in before you could get the words out.

When you next woke, it was late. Too late. You opened your eyes the second you regained consciousness, alert and searching the room for Saeran, but his back was turned to you and he was walking toward the door.

_He's leaving?_

You tried to force yourself to speak, only managing to exhale a quiet wheeze, a pitiful mixture of failure and weakness.

 _No!_ You wanted to shout as you watched Saeran's retreating form. _I'm awake! Look! LOOK!_ But he opened the door and left the room before you could have done anything to catch his attention, leaving you defeated and alone in the room.

You frowned.

Even in your slumber, you'd yearned to tell Saeran that you forgave him. To see his face light up and to see him _smile_ for the first time in months made your heart weak at the very thought. _And now I have to wait_ , you thought with childlike frustration.

It was only then that you actually took the opportunity to observe the room you were in. And the moment you began to do so, a sick feeling settled in your stomach.

Dread.

 _He treated me for an Elixir overdose_ , you realized with a start as your mind slowly began to piece together the information that you'd been too slow to consider earlier.

There was only one place in the world that would have a treatment for the Elixir of Salvation. And it was the worst possible place Saeran could have taken you. 

You closed your eyes as if that would help hide you from the realization that was growing clearer and clearer in your mind.

 _No_ , you wanted to scream, hoping that if you denied the truth it would be less true. But reality and truth were two sides of the same coin: and it was a coin of unwavering cruelty.

You slowly brought your eyes up, praying that you wouldn't see the mark.

But there, at the top of the doorframe, was displayed the proud sigil where the cult reaffirmed its presence in every single room.

The emblem of paradise.

The emblem of the magenta.

The emblem of the Mint Eye.

And suddenly, you began to fear for Saeran.

Because it began to seem less and less likely that he would return to you.

 _But I forgive him,_ you thought weakly, feeling your consciousness being sapped away from you as you helplessly reached toward the door that Saeran had exited from. _I need to tell him. I need him to know._

But the blackness had already set in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.4k
> 
> Notes: I'm learning Endless Struggle (Saeran's theme) on the piano right now and it's such a beautiful piece aghsdafshakflkadjsk 
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 03/30/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	24. XVIII: Saeran's Route (Saeran)

There comes a point in someone's life where they've fucked up so much that it doesn't seem possible to further screw things up.

In fact, when (Y/N)'s pained groan brought Saeran—the real Saeran, not the Elixir-brainwashed one—back to the forefront of his mind, he'd been almost relieved as he sprinted away with her in his arms, thinking that at the very least, things wouldn't get worse.

But then he'd realized that he had to do something about the Elixir in her bloodstream, make sure that he got it out of her system before the damage was as irreversible to her as it had been to him...so what did he do?

 _I fucked everything up even more_ , Saeran thought to himself as he hid a knife in his boot and one in his sleeve. _That's what I did._

The boy was a pro hacker, bested not even by his twin. No one in the entire Mint Eye could hold a candle to him, not when it came to raw intellect. But when Saeran glimpsed down at (Y/N)'s face, completely scrunched up in pain, every rational thought left him and he brought her to the only place he knew for certain there would be a cure: back to the Mint Eye.

Back to the hellhole that had gotten them into this mess in the first place.

 _Asking help from Saeyoung and V would have been better than this_ , the boy thought to himself as he patted himself down, making sure that he looked like a true and proper believer before exiting the medical room he'd brought (Y/N) to. For a moment, he almost turned around in hopes of seeing her delicate face one last time, before forcing himself forward to open the door.

 _I will only deserve to see her once I've gotten us out of this mess_ , Saeran resolved to himself. He'd left a laptop in that room. If he didn't return, (Y/N) should be able to hack her way into the Security Room and buy enough time to escape.

But at the moment, Saeran's objective wasn't just to escape the Mint Eye.

No, the years he'd spent here were too many and the anguish of the Elixirs too great for him to simply walk out. He'd been the Savior's right-hand man from the start, and now it was time to fix things.

It was time to use all his power to destroy the Mint Eye: by removing their leader.

Saeran kept his gaze low and his hood high as he walked down the corridor. He didn't need to see the hall to know where he was, and he didn't need the disciples' coordinates to know where they'd be gathered.

As much as he hated to admit it, the Mint Eye was more familiar to him than the back of his palm.

Which was was perhaps why he knew that his plan might be suicide. _The disciples are trained to defend, not to kill_ , he tried to reassure himself, but he knew that all of them would do anything to get in good favor with Rika.

He stood before the doors of the Planning Hall, wondering if he would leave the room alive in chains or dead on a gurney. The more Saeran thought about it, the more realistic the latter seemed.

But if there was one thing Rika had respected him for, it was his resolve.

Nothing, not even the prospect of death, would stop him now.

Saeran pulled the small dagger he'd hidden in his sleeve, brandishing it up in an intimidating pose.

Then he pulled open the doors and started screaming.

***

It took the disciples less than a minute to restrain him, and another minute to get his hood off and reveal his identity.

Honestly, he was relieved that they didn't kill him on the spot, and they probably would have, if not for the fact that he'd drawn too much attention to himself to actually _hurt_ anyone with his knife. They tore the weapon from his hands and bound his arms together, stuffing a ball of cloth in his mouth to quiet his wild screaming as they shoved him into the dungeon.

Saeran spat the cloth out of his mouth when they left, leaning back against the dungeon wall. It was grimy and gross, but acting like a psychotic monster was surprisingly tiring. The boy needed a moment to catch his breath.

His next immediate objective was to remove his bindings.

Saeran must have looked like an extortionist, trying to get the rope around his wrists to catch along the edge of one of the metal bars encaging him. Once he did, though, it was only a matter of time before the ropes gave into the wear and tear he was forcing them through as he rubbed them vigorously against the metal, almost giving up before they finally split and came undone.

The boy sighed in relief.

If he'd still been restrained when the Savior came down to meet him, his entire plan would fall apart.

And it seemed that the bindings had come off just in time.

Saeran heard the door open and a delicate pair of footsteps trail down the stairs that would lead to him.

 _Rika,_ he knew, from the sound alone.

The hacker immediately dropped to the floor, cautiously placing himself in a position close to the bars that would enable him to pull the dagger in his boot with ease if need be. He needed to look weak. Weak and pathetic and lost, just like she thought he was.

He didn't look when he heard the footsteps grow near. No, that would be giving her too much power; Saeran kept his gaze fixated on the ground in front of him, the ruined concrete where even the ground broke under the terrifying weight of the Mint Eye.

"Saeran," A voice murmured, calm as usual but far from sweet.

He ignored her.

"...I must confess, the last thing I expected today would be news of your return. What did they say you tried to do? You had a knife and were trying to attack a room full of my disciples?"

Saeran bit his lip, sensing the amusement in Rika's voice. Did she perhaps see through his plan? What if he had sacrificed himself for nothing? Did she know him that well?

 _Calm down_ , he told himself, realizing that panic would only lead to more panic. And at this point, if Rika had even the slightest intimation that something was wrong, his chance for redemption would disappear.

"Did you truly think that bringing harm to my followers was the way to go, Saeran?" Rika asked. "Were you that upset...after what you did to (Y/N)?"

Saeran tried to block Rika's voice out, suddenly realizing that it was never her weapons he succumbed to in the past. It was her words. Her sweet, saccharine words.

He had to say something, and quickly, before she could talk his mind into circles and make him doubt himself. He'd already spent the past three hours berating himself over what he'd done to (Y/N), but the wound was still raw, and as soon as Rika began picking at it the memory would open up and Saeran would be at her mercy once more.

"I didn't know where to go," Saeran blurted, his voice sounding rough and uncouth in the dungeon air after Rika had been speaking for so long.

The woman laughed. "But of course, Saeran." He could almost feel her smile growing sinister. "Because there's no place in the world for people like you. Weaklings can only hope to be happy here, at the Mint Eye. So that just leaves one question, hm?"

Rika approached the bars, just in range of Saeran but still not close enough.

"Where did you leave (Y/N)?"

Saeran kept silent, pulling his knees to his chest as if he were a baby that needed comforting.

"If you tell me where (Y/N) is, I'll let you come back to Paradise." Rika dropped to her knees, trying to get Saeran to look into her eyes.

Inside his mind, every fiber of his being began screaming with anticipation. _She's off-balance!_ He knew that this was as good a chance as any, but still... _just a little closer._

"Well?" Rika cocked her head down, moving an inch forward.

And that inch was all Saeran needed.

His hand darted out through the metal bars, grabbing the collar of her Savior's gown in a fistful, forcing her body to sway unsteadily with her head pulled close to Saeran. In one fluid motion, the boy had drawn his hidden dagger, holding it close against her neck as she watched the blade with her eyes, the bright green orbs suddenly darkening when she sensed the murderous glint in Saeran's eyes.

Her hands reacted before her mouth, clawed at his arm. It wasn't long before he could feel her digging trenches into his skin with her shaped nails, but the pain only strengthened Saeran's grip, fueling his anger alongside every memory he had of this godforsaken cult.

He held the blade to her throat, making sure she could feel the bite of the steel.

"You will regret this," She told him, her voice no longer calm and serene as it had been.

Saeran pulled the blade back, ready to end his and (Y/N)'s and everyone's frustrations with a swift _swipe_ when he remembered (Y/N)'s last words to him.

_"Stop apologizing."_

Saeran paused, thinking.

When she'd told him that, Saeran wanted to argue with her. To tell her that he was apologizing because he _kept_ fucking up and that he deserved to apologize when he kept committing such horrible sins. Each apology, he wanted to say, was a new promise to try to be better. So that one day he wouldn't have to say 'sorry' between every breath.

And then his mind wandered to the man who had betrayed him and left him with Rika in the first place: _V._

The pair were lovers. If he slit Rika's throat, would he find himself apologizing to V, later? How much sadness would that bring forth?

 _No!_ Saeran thought to himself, realizing that his resolve to kill Rika was weakening. _If I kill her, I free everyone at the Mint Eye from her trickery. It'll bring more happiness than pain!_

But then his thoughts were of Saeyoung.

And he remembered that his brother had abandoned him and left him to Rika and V under his delusion that it would bring Saeran happiness. A decision made without ever consulting the younger, and thus a decision that ended up bringing forth years of pain.

_Even though Saeyoung thought he was making the right decision._

And finally, he thought of Rika, not the woman in front of him who called herself the Savior, but the first woman who had ever loved him, who had cared for him and smiled at him and laughed with him.

"You'll regret this," Rika repeated, continuing to claw at his arm. She was desperate, eyes wild with an animal instinct to _survive_.

But it wasn't her words that forced Saeran to release her from his grasp.

It was the overwhelming realization that if he killed her, it would only bring about more suffering in the world. More pain. To him. To V. Maybe even to (Y/N).

 _And (Y/N) wanted me to stop apologizing_ , Saeran realized as he dropped the knife to the ground, releasing Rika from his grasp. _How could I do something like this and never apologize for it?_

Rika looked at him in disbelief when he slunk back down onto the ground, numb.

Saeran's plan had been perfect. So perfect, that he had actually managed to execute the whole thing properly. _But so imperfect_ , he realized as Rika stood up and dusted herself off. _Because if I killed her I would lose myself in the process._

Saeran didn't blink when Rika left, nor when she returned with a monstrous heaping of the blue liquid he'd grown acquainted with. His plan was doomed from the start, he realized right before his consciousness began to grow fuzzy.

When he'd drunk it all, only one thought remained in his mind as he lay on the cold dungeon floor, unmoving.

 _(Y/N)_.

One thought, one hope, but above all: one need.

Because if she failed as he had, the two of them truly would be entirely and wholly _fucked_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.1k
> 
> Notes: idk why but i keep getting all these angsty jumin x reader fic ideas and that's alllll i can think about writing
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 04/02/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	25. XIX: Saeran's Route (Y/N)

"We've informed the Savior of Mr. Ray's actions. Her holiness is already in her way to the dungeons to meet with him."

Those words echoed through your mind like a mantra as you desperately replayed them, searching for a way out of the situation. You'd been daydreaming when you were able to eavesdrop on the two disciples just outside the room you were in, more worried about them coming in than you were about the contents of their conversation.

But when they dropped the name _Ray_ , you couldn't help but pull yourself from your thoughts and listen to their words.

And thank god you did.

 _He's captured._ The very thought sent shivers down your spine. You remembered Saeran's determined stride forward when he left the room, and at the time you'd been confident that he would return to you.

But as minutes drew into hours, the seeds of panic in your stomach began to grow. And those disciples' words just reinforced your every fear.

_He's captured._

It had taken you less than a minute to disconnect your body from the Elixir-removing machine attached to you, pulling out all the needles and tubes one-by-one until you were free from its grip. It had taken you another minute to search the room for valuables, whereupon you found Saeran's laptop.

But you'd been sitting for the past ten minutes fumbling over the lock screen, debating whether or not to push the _Enter_ button that would determine your fate. If you'd guessed his password right, then all would be well. You could contact Luciel and Vanderwood—the former was certain to help—and use their involvement to save you _and_ Saeran.

But if you were wrong, you were dooming both you and your lover in one fell swoop.

_"My password is always the most important person in my life."_

Saeran had told you that. He'd winked when he said it, and as soon as those words left his lips you were confident that _you_ were the important person he was speaking of. But so much time had passed since then. So many tears shed. So many promises broken. How unrealistic was it for Saeran's password to switch amidst all those other changes?

_One attempt remaining._

Who had wasted the second attempt? Back in Luciel's cabin, you'd attempted MC's name while trying to hack into Saeran's user. As soon as you realized that the password was wrong, you'd moved on, a small part of you knowing that wasting password attempts was the last thing you needed.

So where had the second attempt gone? You knew there were three in total, but who on earth...

_Luciel._

You sighed. Of course it was him.

Luciel's attempt to trade you in exchange for his brother only proved his desperation to see Saeran again, however convoluted the process was. No doubt, his actions were messed up. But the lengths he was willing to go to for Saeran's sake only strengthened your confidence that he would be just as willing to break back into the Mint Eye to get the two of you out.

_And I can't do shit to contact him unless I get into this laptop._

You let your finger touch the _Enter_ key, applying no pressure with your index until you were thoroughly convinced that there was no other possibility. No other candidate. No other guess.

His password was the most important person in his life.

And it _had_ to be you.

You pressed down, letting your finger jump back as if the laptop would betray you with a _Locked-Out_ screen at any moment.

But then one second passed. And then two. And then three, and then you saw the loading screen of the Mint Eye as the colors slowly filled in from empty white to sickening green, and then you were in.

You were in.

_You were in._

A smile broke out on your face, despite the dire situation. Entering your name as Saeran's password had carried more weight than simply granting you access to his device. No, it proved his affection for you, the very affection that had seemed like it was failing these past months.

It proved that, despite everything, he still loved you.

And that maybe, he'd never stopped.

_The gardens of the Mint Eye were bare. Not a single flower had been spared, and even the tall green bushes had been stripped bare of their ferns._

_Above the two of you, the sun was shining proud and glorious. On a normal day, the light would have bounced off the petals to create a stunning effect, bringing the colors to life as they danced with every slight movement of the head._

_But no longer._

_"Don't feel sad," You murmured. You slipped your hand into Saeran's larger one and gave him it a comforting squeeze. But his blank expression only darkened, a stark contrast to the sunlit sky above you both._

_"The Savior said that the ceremony would only require a few flowers." Saeran's mutter was barely audible, the boy unwilling to say the words any louder for fear of a wandering believer hearing them. It was a subtle protest, an angry fist raised to the magenta. The Savior had asked Saeran's consent in using the garden's flowers for the previous night's celebration, making it seem as if fewer than fifty would be picked._

_But she had stripped the garden bare._

_You said nothing to the boy next to you. You were committed in heart and soul to the Savior, the Mint Eye, and the magenta_ —y _ou couldn't agree to his angry complaint with your leader's actions._

_But it pained you to see him like this._

_"Saeran," You called out softly. When he didn't respond, you moved to stand in front of him so that he was forced to look at you. "We can rebuild this. All of it. Together. We'll be here together forever, right? Even flowers won't take forever to grow."_

_For the first time that day, a soft smile bloomed on Saeran's lips. You couldn't be sure if it was at the prospect of growing the gardens back or at your mention of spending the rest of your lives together, but you continued on regardless._

_"We can grow new flowers, too. Sunflowers in one corner. Daisies over there. We can even grow the blue roses you love so much, and we can have tulips, and lilies, and orchids, and a lilac bush, and—"_

_Saeran put a finger to your lips, silencing you._

_"Shh. Any more and you'll run out of flower names." That much was true enough. It was only after the two of you had spent weeks replanting the gardens that you finally developed an interest in flowers. Up until that point, you hardly knew the difference between a poppy and a peony._

_"But...thank you," Saeran finally said after a long silence. "If we can grow this back...I think that would be enough for me to be happy forever. As long as you're with me, of course."_

_"Of course," You responded, wrapping your other hand around Saeran's so that you were holding both. "I'll never leave you."_

You smiled at the memory.

The gardens had grown back, fuller and lusher—and the next time the Savior requested flowers for a ceremony, Saeran picked them out himself to control the numbers.

Those gardens had been witness to so many promises between the two of you: mostly to stay at the Mint Eye together forever. It was a recurring theme in your conversations, as if the two of you knew that one day something might occur to tear you apart.

The fact that the 'something' would be the Savior herself was definitely unexpected. _Not the Savior, Rika_ , you chided yourself while waiting for your connection to process. _She saved no one._

You drummed your fingers on your laptop while waiting for the screen to load. Every second that passed furthered your fears. What if Luciel wouldn't pick up? What if he and Vanderwood had already left? What if it turned out to be MC on the other line instead of the men, and she cut the call before you could convey your message?

You bit your lip.

You'd already disrupted the connection between the Mint Eye's alarms and its triggers so that others in the system everything wouldn't be able to see any obvious changes; you'd blocked lower-level believers from having access to the main doors to stir up confusion; you'd released all of Saeran's files on the RFA and other projects. In short, you'd done everything you could possibly think of without doing the single most important thing: contacting Luciel and Vanderwood.

 _Pick up, damn it_.

You glared daggers at the laptop. You'd saved this specific task for last because you _knew_ that if they wouldn't respond, you and Saeran would be left with little chance to escape. They had to pick up. They _had_ to. Surely fate wouldn't be so cruel as to completely desert you of hope?

You stared at the black screen, gazing hopelessly at it as if the object would feel sorry for you and would work faster. You were just about to give up on contacting the agents when the screen flickered.

There was no video connected, but you could hear the quiet buzz of the other side's audio. _They picked up._

"Who is this?" A hostile voice shouted.

You sighed in relief.

_Luciel._

"It's me," You responded, turning on your video feed so the redhead could see your face. You ignored how horrible you looked, opting to fill him in on the situation. "Listen, I know we didn't part on the best of terms but Saeran and I...need your help."

On the other side, Luciel and Vanderwood turned their screen on so that you could see their concerned faces. "Tell us how we can help," The brunette said, and you swiftly informed him of everything that had happened in the hours since separation.

"Shit," Luciel cursed, clenching his fists. You could see the anger in his eyes from when you told him about Saeran's capture, and even Vanderwood seemed to tense as you explained what the boy was probably being forced to endure.

"No time for that. I've disabled all the Mint Eyes defenses. I did everything I could do, without anyone noticing. But once Rika gets out of that dungeon, you can bet that she's going to get these disciples to triple check everything. We need you here as soon as you can get. Even sooner. There's no telling how long it'll be before..."

"Before?"

You swallowed harshly.

The Elixirs were what first turned Saeran against you, burying the real him deep in the sickly mask of his mint green eyes. And no doubt, the only reason Rika had even bothered to go down to the dungeons herself was so that she could hand-feed him the blue liquid herself.

There was no telling how long he would last.

"Before we lose Saeran." _For good._

On the screen, you watched as Luciel banged a fist onto the wooden table. The sound startled you, and you regretted the fact that your volume was so high. In the momentary silence that followed, you strained your ears to check if there were believers outside.

Sure enough, you heard footsteps.

And they were approaching quicker than you'd like.

On the screen, Vanderwood must have noticed your fearful gaze as you watched the door. "(Y/N)? What? What is it?"

You pressed an index finger to your lips, holding your breath while waiting for your door to open.

One second passed. Then another. And then another. And the dread in your stomach seemed to fade. Still, it was far too risky for you to stay on this call. Even the slightest sound would draw attention to you, and that was the _last_ thing you wanted, especially with Saeran already captured.

"I have to go," You whispered.

"Wait!"

You flicked your gaze back onto the laptop screen where you had been about to close it, meeting Luciel's eyes. The boy seemed abashed and hesitant.

Very unlike him.

"Ah, I just..." He seemed to sense the impatience in your eyes. "I wanted to say I'm sorry. For...trying to trade you for Saeran. And for getting you back into this hot mess when you'd been escaping it in the first place."

Despite the situation, you couldn't help but smile at the boy. Just like his brother, he was good at heart. How could you blame someone like that? "Don't be sorry," You murmured with a smile. "Get me and Saeran out of here and that'll be all the apology we need."

With those parting words, you closed the laptop, sliding it under the blanket as you tiptoed out of the bed. It was too risky for you to stay in one place.

You opened the door, instantly knowing your location based on the layout of the hall.

But that information would prove to be useless.

Because the moment you stepped out and turned left, you came face to face with a believer.

"I _thought_ I heard someone inside,"He said with a sneer, grabbing your arms before you could make any movement to escape. "Hehe, the rebellious councilgirl (Y/N), is it?"

You flinched as he studied your mint eyes and white hair, your appearance too _different_ for him not to recognize you. In an instant, you understood the true motivation that compelled Rika to change the appearance of everyone in her council. It wasn't just to become the personification of magenta, or to adorn the namesake of Mint Eye. It was to forever bind you to the cult and to her, so that a single glance at you would be all it took to recognize your allegiance. It was to make sure that you had no escape, no way out, no shelter from this bloody hell.

You cursed, only thankful for the fact that you'd managed to contact Luciel and Vanderwood before getting caught.

 _Right,_ you thought as you felt yourself being dragged in the direction of the dungeons. _Luciel and Vanderwood will save us._

They were probably already on their way, driving chaotically through the woods to get here as you'd instructed them. You'd given them everything you could, exploited every opportunity, opened every hole in the Mint Eye's defenses.

The only question left was whether they would make it in time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.4k
> 
> Notes: I didn't post this last night because I thought I'd be home by like 9 but it's now 5 AM and yeah I'm sorry about that >.>
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 4/06/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	26. XX: Saeran's Route (Y/N)

Was it kindness that compelled Rika to throw you in the same cell as Saeran? Or cruelty?

You turned your gaze to the broken boy lying in your lap, unable to even utter a word.

Was she telling you to enjoy your final moments with the boy you'd come to love? Or perhaps she was trying to make your end as miserable as possible, forcing you to sit and watch as he slowly died in your arms, suffocating under the weight of his own skin.

You gazed into Saeran's open eyes, cupping his cheek. Was he alert? Did he see you? Was he even conscious?

You couldn't bring your other hand away from his chest. The slow pulse of his heartbeat under your warm hand was the only thing keeping you sane—the only verification of his life. But how much longer could he hold on?

You pulled your gaze back up to his eyes, staring at the blue-green irises that had once seemed to hold the entire sky in them, though now it looked like the cloudiness was setting in. "Saeran?" You whispered, praying for a response. Anything would do. A groan. A frown. A twitch.

Nothing.

"Saeran, you have to throw it up, okay?" You pulled the boy up by his arms, awkwardly rolling him onto his side so that his mouth was tilted toward the far corner of the cell you were both in. Never did your hand leave the spot where his heart kept beating. Never did you let yourself forget that there was still hope, dwindling as it was.

"Are you ready, Saeran?" You cooed into his ear, trying to give him time to prepare himself even though you doubted he was sentient enough for it to help. "Get ready on...Three, two, one."

You pushed his stomach in, earning a choke from Saeran. You hesitated and waited until you felt the familiar _thump thump_ of his heart before a second attempt, then a third, a fourth, and before you knew it you were pressing on his stomach with all your might.

More choking sounds.

But you couldn't stop. You had to do this. You wouldn't let the Elixir sit in Saeran's stomach.

Rather, forcing him into the pain of vomiting it all back up was his best chance at survival right now.

You leaned Saeran forward, adding your knee to the pressure on his abdomen, and that was the straw that broke the camel's back. Within seconds, mint-green chemicals were spilling forth from his mouth, the contents emptying into the corner of the dungeon, like a tiny lake of death.

"More, Saeran. Please, just a little more." You pushed harder and the boy's stomach responded, more fluid emerging from his mouth until he was pushing himself off the ground: awake, alert, and _alive._

"E-enough," He sputtered out through coughs. Saeran was on his hands and knees, clutching his throat as the remnants of the Elixir were expelled from his body. "I-I'm good now."

A smile bloomed on your face as you leaned backward in your position on the ground, relief flooding your senses like a tidal wave of happiness. You couldn't stop tears from forming in your eyes when Saeran finally regained enough strength to look at you and throw himself into your arms, giving you the first hug in what felt like an eternity.

"You're okay," You murmured in disbelief, tightening your arms around his slender frame.

"I'm okay," He responded, nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. You could feel a wetness spill from his eyes as he clung to you, unwilling to let go. Though, in the moment, you were just as reluctant to leave the comforting embrace.

"I-I called Luciel. And Vanderwood. The Mint Eye's security defenses are completely down. They can literally walk in and—"

A blaring alarm interrupted the two of you from your momentary reunion, causing you both to further bury yourselves in each other's arms in an attempt to hide from the sound.

There was only a second before Rika's prerecorded voice played out over the speakers, and after that brief moment of _calm_ passed, only chaos followed.

The booms and crashes and screams coming from up above were distant but loud, and there was no question in the fact that the duo that had come to rescue you and Saeran was not trying to be subtle about it.

"That must be them," Saeran thought out loud, looking up. The two of you had been settled in the central dungeons, the most secure part of the Mint Eye but also the part directly beneath the main entrance. Without a doubt, if Luciel and Vanderwood were the ones who had caused that alarm then they were directly above you: 2,000 feet up.

"Why'd you leave th-the alarms on?" Saeran asked, coughing in the middle. It seemed that the effects of the Elixir were still taking their toll on him.

"So that Rika wouldn't realize that I'd disabled everything else," You responded before shushing the boy. "Don't talk. You'll make it worse."

"Th-there's something I need to tell you, though," Saeran whispered, pulling back from the hug. You wanted to admonish and quiet him, but he began speaking before you could intervene. "I know you don't want me to apologize. But I'm sorry, (Y/N). I'm so fucking sorry. These past two months, I've treated you like _shi-"_

You brought a finger to Saeran's lips, silencing him with a shake of your head. "That's in the past. I forgive you."

"But you _shouldn't_ forgive me! I've been so awful to you!" Saeran continued rambling, lost once more in one of his long apologies. 

You almost laughed.

In all this time, after everything that these past two months had put you through, nothing had truly changed in your relationship. He was still the apologetic teddy bear you cared for. No, he was the apologetic teddy bear you _loved_.

"Shh," You whispered to Saeran once more, a tiny smile on your face as an idea popped into your head.

"But-"

_There it was._

The apologetic teddy bear had spoken once more, another 'I'm sorry' about to roll off his lips when you silenced him with a sweet and chaste kiss.

You smiled into his lips, still young and inexperienced. The only other man you'd kissed in your entire life had been Saeran's own brother, Luciel. But with Luciel it had been different. Hot and passionate, but lacking _love_.

And so this kiss with Saeran felt as novel and foreign as the future that it would trigger between you two, one filled with happiness and hope and _life._

"I don't need you to apologize for anything," You murmured. "Because I love you despite it all."

Saeran hesitated for a moment, before everything holding him back vanished. He leaned forward to recapture your lips, and you felt his shoulders shake and his cheeks grow wet once more as you two basked in the sweet glory of simply being together. It made you smile, to know that something simple as a kiss could bring him such emotion. It reassured you. Deep in your heart, you'd known of your affections for Saeran for years. The implication that he wouldn't feel the same way would have been too much for you to handle.

"But I have one more thing to apologize for," Saeran whispered, bringing his lips a hair away from yours. You were about to tell him to shut up and kiss you again, but as usual, he continued before you had the chance. "This wasn't our first kiss."

You looked up into his eyes, startled.

Had you two kissed before? After so much time together, the idea wasn't _that_ absurd, but you were certain you would have remembered something so important.

"It was during your Secondary commitment. That was the first time. And...despite everything that had been going on, you trusted me. And that was the moment when I realized that I loved you." Saeran leaned forward and met your lips again, unwilling to lose the contact for more than a second.

"I love you," He repeated, kissing your cheek, as if testing the words.

"I love you." He kissed your neck with newfound confidence.

"I love you." He kissed your jaw.

"I love you." Your shoulder.

He traced your entire body like that, sending shudders down your spine as his lips ghosted over every bit of exposed skin, leaving nothing unclaimed with another whispered 'I love you' so that every part of you knew it for the truth.

You could only repeat it back to him when he finally moved back up to your lips, and by then the entire world had stopped for you two. The sound of alarms upstairs in the Mint Eye was like background music, edging the two of you on as Saeran pressed your back to the cell wall, deepening each kiss with his tongue.

Even the sound of bombs seemed far away as his hands made contact with your skin, one resting on your thigh and the other on the small of your back as he pressed your body closer to his. And the sound of screams faded into an off-tune melody that enveloped the two of you as you wrapped your arms around Saeran's neck, a quiet beg for more.

All around you, there was chaos. Mayhem. Havoc.

But your quiet cell was the first glimpse of true paradise you'd seen since your arrival in the Mint Eye so many years ago: and it was a pale-faced paradise with short, white hair, and mint green eyes.

It was a paradise that you'd spent years befriending and loving, a paradise that would be with you no matter where you went.

It was a paradise you loved, and a paradise that loved you back.

It was true paradise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.7k
> 
> Notes: Owowowow im on spring break but this is the week that all the textbooks i ordered in preparation for my exams have arrived T^T wish me luck i get to work out and then do 80 pages of math! how exciting.
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 4/09/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	27. XXI: Saeran's Route (Luciel)

Having Vanderwood constantly around sucked.

It meant that Luciel always had to be on top of his work. He could never fully relax, ever. His apartment was really more shared property than his own, and the redhead was constantly reminded of his affiliation with the Agency.

But at times like this, having Vanderwood around was pretty much the best thing a guy could ask for.

 _Thank you, Ms Vanderwood_ , Luciel thought in his head for the hundredth time. When his boss had haphazardly shouted for Luciel to find Saeran and (Y/N), and that he alone would manage to deal with Rika, the redhead's body had moved to obey before any mental processing had happened.

It was only when he was well on his way down the stairs leading to the dungeon that he realized that Vanderwood wasn't merely giving him a command with those words—he was giving him an opportunity.

A chance.

To speak with Saeran.

 _And the last time I tried, that went far from well_ , Luciel thought sullenly as he continued down the steps leading into the dungeon. As he trod deeper and deeper down, it felt like he could feel the weight of the world on his shoulders. Or was that the weight of his fear, as he drew closer to the situation that would be the confrontation of everything that had happened in the past decade?

 _Right_ , Luciel thought. _This mission was never about Rika, or even the Mint Eye. It's about Saeran._

Luciel and Vanderwood had tried their best to get to the Mint Eye as soon as (Y/N)'s desperate video call had come through, but V still caught them before they ran out. He'd insisted on coming—shockingly stubborn for a guy who was usually so docile—and had drilled it into both agents' minds that the top priority for this mission was seizing Rika. V had been clear: _If you manage to get her to me, all the believers will be safe. It'll be some time before we can help them reintegrate into society, but they'll be safe. And that includes Saeran and (Y/N)._

Luciel had agreed in the moment, but that never changed the fact that Saeran was his true priority.

The redhead hesitated when he saw the dim outline of the bottom of the stairs, a small flat openway right before a door. He knew what lay on the other side; he'd interrogated more than enough believers at gunpoint on his way here to confirm that the two people he was looking for lay in the depths of this dungeon.

He placed a hand on the door, trying to summon the strength to push it open. Or rather, trying to summon the courage. Luciel knew all too well that, depending on Saeran's reaction, his world would either be rebuilt completely or come crashing down.

And there was only one way to find out.

He pushed the door open.

***

"V will handle the rest," Vanderwood muttered, crossing his arms.

"We're seriously leaving him here, _alone?_ With Rika? With all the believers?" Luciel scoffed at the idea, crossing his arms as he gazed upon the Mint Eye. Or what remained of the Mint Eye. The glorious building was crumbling from all the bombs he and Vanderwood had used to wreak havoc and gain entry, the infrastructure coming down in a tumble. "How's he even going to transport all of them out?"

"I restrained Rika, and the rest of them are subdued. V said he'd call someone named 'Jumin' and that the two of them would take care of it." Vanderwood crossed his arms. "But don't you have more important things to worry about, Luciel?"

The agent raised an eyebrow and stared at the redhead, who looked away uncomfortably.

"I'm guessing your little reunion didn't go as well as you'd hoped?"

Luciel sighed.

When he'd come upon Saeran and (Y/N) in the dungeon, the two had been ready to fuck each other, the way their bodies were molded against each other as their lips collided. Luciel had been too startled to say anything, and his brother too embarrassed, so little words had been exchanged save for the occasional instruction or explanation of the plan.

But now, nearly a full hour had passed since the rescue mission, and Luciel had _still_ yet to say a word to his brother. And after so much silence, it felt like the only thing that could possibly follow was even _more_ silence.

"Tch, whatever. You don't need to tell me about it. But those two don't have anywhere to go, and you're the only one they can turn to. So whatever happened, you need to suck it up and _take them home_. From what that blond bitch told me, they've been here for years. They've got a lot of healing to do, Luciel, and you're going to want to be there the whole time."

The redhead looked at the ground.

Vanderwood always gave the right advice, even if it was hard to hear it.

 _I should be thankful that he's not yelling at me for setting up that hostage exchange_ , Luciel thought, before the sound of a jingle broke him from his thoughts.

Body reacting before his mind could, Luciel's fingers darted out to catch the object Vanderwood had thrown to him.

"Keys? You're giving me your car?" Luciel raised an eyebrow. Vanderwood loved his beat-up van nearly as much as Luciel loved his sleek and shiny babies; the agent had never even been allowed to touch it without Vanderwood's supervision.

"I'll collect it from your bunker later. I don't trust these cultists alone with V, so I'll stay with him to make sure that no one tries anything funny. You...your assignment is different from mine."

A small smile appeared on Luciel's face. Vanderwood truly was a big softie at heart, even if he retained the pretense that this was just an 'assignment' for the Agency.

"Thanks, Ms Vanderwood," He said with a wink. "I won't let you down."

And technically speaking, he didn't.

It took Luciel all of five minutes to find (Y/N) and Saeran, two minutes to bring them to Vanderwood's car, and half an hour before they were back on an official road, Mint Eye long behind them.

 _But how long before one of us speaks?_ Luciel wondered as he sped the car along, observing the scenery all around them. The mountains were to the right of them, the setting sun on the left, and there was a terrifying cliff drop that would instantly kill everyone in the car if Luciel lost control.

But as the warm sun beat down on them, Luciel began to remember the hundreds of times he'd stared at the morning sunrise and evening sunset, thanking God for the fact that though he and Saeran were separated, his other half was at least _somewhere_ under the same sky as him.

And he decided that if there was ever a moment to speak: it was then. Under the protection of the sun, with his Gods watching over him, with nothing but nature and life all around them.

"Saeran," He murmured, slowing the car to a stop. "Come out of the car with me for a second."

Luciel's voice sounded strange, he thought. An abrasive intrusion to the heavy silence that had settled over the three of them, but that didn't stop him. He opened the car door and walked out, seating himself on the edge of the road, waiting.

It wasn't long before Saeran joined him, the two staring off the cliff, hands flat against the hot tar ground, the beautiful drop of nature laid out before them in the stunning scenery of a forest that had yet to be touched by civilization.

"We used to watch the sunset," The redhead murmured. His voice felt more natural coming out, now that the sound of cawing birds and chirping insects had been added to the background noise. "All the time, when we were little."

"I remember," Saeran whispered, and Luciel was left temporarily breathless at how different his twin's voice sounded. _So different from what I remember_. "The sunrise, too, if you recall."

"Of course, I recall." Luciel sighed. "I never forgot about you. I don't know what Rika told you, or what you went through at the Mint Eye, but I never—"

"I know."

Luciel's eyes widened in surprise.

"After (Y/N) and I returned to the Mint Eye...the Savior caught me. And she tortured me in the dungeons. It was the first time she _actually_ tortured me—usually, she let the Elixir do that—but she wanted me to repent for everything. And she figured that the truth would hurt me more than any more of her lies."

Luciel's breath caught in his throat. He knew he shouldn't ask this next question, but he couldn't stop the words from leaving his mouth.

"And did it?"

"Of course," Saeran muttered. For the first time since entering the dungeon cell to free him and (Y/N), Saeran turned to face Luciel. "I suppose I owe you an apology? For sabotaging all your work in the RFA and trying to get you killed and stuff?"

The redhead let out a laugh, a true laugh. The first genuine laugh he'd had the pleasure of releasing since he left Saeran in the first place.

"Saeran, look at everything around us. What do you see?"

"Um...trees?'

Luciel rolled his eyes, his usual grin now locked on his face. "Look closer. Trees, animals, the sky, those are all _basic_. What do you _see?"_

"You? The road? (Y/N), in the car? What are you on about?" Saeran's voice was growing louder, laced with agitation at his brother's antics.

But the smile never left Luciel's face.

"All wrong. What you see in front of you is a blank slate. A forest that's been preserved for hundreds of years, maybe thousands, untouched by humans."

"Did you turn into Buddhist monk when I left or something? Geez," Saeran muttered, standing up. But Luciel yanked his hand and pulled him down, wrapping an arm around Saeran's shoulders.

"This forest is going to be torn down in two years. And from that point, it'll be a blank slate. And after all the construction is complete and this place is turned _into_ something, that'll be another blank slate. And one day, when that, too, is torn down it'll be one again. Don't you get it? Everything, life, this forest, _us_ , is about new beginnings."

And finally, Saeran didn't retort with a snarky comment. Luciel heard the boy make a quiet _"oh"_ as he understood his meaning: that the two of them could restart. Together. Make amends and rebuild themselves _together_ into two parts, united as one.

And when they returned to the car, another silence settled over the three of them as Luciel continued speeding back to the bunker.

But this silence wasn't heavy with unanswered questions, or weighed down by anger and resentment as it had been half an hour prior.

No, the silence was a new beginning in itself, quiet with comfort and security, wrapping itself around the brothers in a wordless promise for a better future.

A happier future.

A future of together.

It was the silence of a promise, that could be built any way their hearts desired. The silence could be filled with laughter, or blurred with music, or softened with shared memories of a happier time. The silence was a question, and the answer could be whatever Saeran and Luciel desired in their hearts. 

And so, for the first time since reuniting with his brother, Luciel didn't mind the silence. As his fingers darted over to Vanderwood's radio to play a song all three of them were familiar with, the silence wasn't even there anymore.

But when it would return, Luciel wouldn't let himself afraid. Or even remotely concerned.

Because he had Saeran now, and Saeran had him. And he would make _sure_ that nothing, not even the unbearable sound of silence, would be able to separate them ever again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.2k
> 
> Notes: Im finally BACK! I am so so SO sorry for that long break, guys. I injured my left hand which made it pretty much impossible to type, and i tried typing with my right hand but it was a hot mess. i was able to update other stories because i had prewritten fics (finally got around to releasing all the oneshots i had drafted for the Obey Me! Fandom <\- super fun game, check it out xoxo) but i had to shelve this story. :\ But never again! There are two chapters left in Saeran's route and I will deliver them both to you by this week or die trying so stay tuned and ill see you all then!
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 4/27/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	28. XXII: Saeran's Route (Saeran)

The sleep was the best thing, he decided.

Saeran opened his eyes lazily, staring up at the ceiling. He didn't shift his body when his eyes darted over to the clock, the mint greens widening ever-so-slightly when he saw that it was already four in the morning.

His body still hadn't fully adjusted to the whole concept of sleeping more than three hours at once. Or the idea of getting _real_ food instead of pills and sugary sweets. Or even the sensation of not having a suit restricting his movements to make him feel like a prisoner inside his own body.

Even the roots of his Saeran's were beginning to grow back in, and they were redder than he had ever remembered them being.

After all, _so much_ had changed.

But the sleep was still the best thing.

Saeran closed his eyes and wrapped his arms tighter around the (h/c) girl clinging to him, breathing in the smell of her hair.

It never failed to be a surprise to wake up, every morning, and find her at his side.

The sweetest surprise.

The boy let out a sigh, perhaps in preparation to drift off into another dreamless slumber before the sound of cursing from another room pulled him back into a state of alertness. He raised an eyebrow at the sound, an amused smile flitting across his face before pressing a kiss to (Y/N)'s temple, crawling out of bed.

"Need help?" He asked once he had snuck up behind his brother.

"Gah!" The redhead exclaimed, practically falling out of his chair. "You scared me, Saeran! Geez!"

Saeran rolled his eyes, glancing at the code his brother had been working on before wordlessly adding a comma between two parameters. "You need sleep, Saeyoung. I saw you working on this before (Y/N) and I went to bed."

_Oh._

That's another thing that had changed.

His redhead brother had abandoned the Luciel persona, deciding that it was time to go back to his roots as Saeyoung. He'd claimed that he was working on a plan to get out of the Agency and begin working with Saeran at Jumin's Intelligence Unit, but that plan wouldn't go through for a while.

"Quiet, little brother. Leave the complicated stuff to your big-brother-defender," Saeyoung responded with a goofy smile, causing Saeran to let out an ungraceful snort.

After two weeks of tension following their return from the Mint Eye, things had finally begun to calm down in their family.

The process was slow going, but Saeran felt it in the little things: the way he no longer tensed at the call of his name, the way his body no longer felt nausea at the sight of a healthy meal, the way the sight of his brother began to calm him instead of frustrate him.

Saeran was healing.

And not just him. (Y/N), too. And even Saeyoung.

At last, all three of them were beginning to grow used to each other, to this whole idea of living together in the bunker.

"Have you decided if you're going to the party or not?" Saeyoung asked, after a moment of silence.

Saeran sighed, plopping himself down on a nearby couch. He stared at the ceiling as he thought about his brother's question.

V had decided to hold another party through the RFA: one to commemorate the return of its original founder (though she wouldn't be joining the organization itself for a _long_ time to come) and to raise the funds necessary to reintegrate all the Mint Eye believers and disciples back into society.

Saeyoung had to attend, as a member of the RFA, but V had extended the invitation to both Saeran and (Y/N). Thus far, Saeran had shown little interest in going and rekindling the flames of their shared memories at the Mint Eye that he'd worked so hard to dampen. But the date of the party drew close, only two days away, and the boy knew that he had to make a decision eventually.

"I'll go if (Y/N) says she wants to," Saeran said after a long silence. "But I don't see any benefit to attending."

"V said that there's something he wants to show you," Saeyoung ventured, turning away from his keyboard to face his brother. "He thought that you and (Y/N) would like it."

"Did he specify with 'it' is?"

The sheepish chuckle from Saeyoung was an answer in itself. The redhead opened his mouth, perhaps to convince his little brother to attend the party, when another voice interrupted them altogether.

"I want to go."

The twins raised their eyes in unison to the source of the voice.

"To the party, I mean," (Y/N) clarified, tossing Saeyoung a sleepy smile as she rubbed her eyes.

"What are you doing up?" Saeran asked, eyes raised in concern. His sleep schedule was still healing from years of neglect in the Mint Eye, Saeyoung the exact same as him in that regard. But it made him worry to see his lover up at such an ungodly hour, especially when she was so vocal about loving her slumber.

"You weren't there in bed," She mumbled, flopping onto the couch and throwing herself into Saeran's arms. She said nothing more, already beginning to doze off as she made herself comfortable while she koala'd herself around Saeran's chest. The boy felt a blush rise to his cheeks, used to her affection but used to it in _private_ , behind closed doors. But if the girl noticed his flustered state at such open love, she didn't show it.

Next to them, Saeyoung stifled a laugh.

"Quite the girl you found yourself, Saeran." An amused grin had risen onto the redhead's face, never failing to enjoy an opportunity to tease his little brother.

"Quiet," Saeran grumbled. He shot his brother a glare, trying not to move to avoid disturbing his lover as she slept—now completely asleep—atop of him. "You found her, too. She told me about how you two kissed in the cabin."

A momentary silence followed, and for a second Saeran worried that he had said something wrong. _Should I have not brought that up?_

But the boy had no reason to fear.

Time had allowed him to forget how deep his connection was with his twin, but the present was proving that bond to be strong and stronger with every new opportunity.

In front of him, the redhead laughed.

"You've got me there, Saeran," Saeyoung said with a chuckle. A new sort of grin spread on his face, one mischievous and light with amusement. "But I never truly had her."

Saeyoung winked, and Saeran felt a blush spread over his cheeks, knowing the meaning of his brother's words.

_Her heart was always mine_ , Saeran knew. _Even when she left._

Even when he had been awful to her, even when the Elixir had stolen the love from his heart, even when he'd brought her a world of pain...(Y/N) had never stopped loving him. And now it was his turn to return all the affections she had never stopped giving him, tenfold.

"Well, you heard her," Saeran mumbled. "She wants to go to the party."

Saeyoung grinned. "Need help picking out a suit?"

"Only if we can find (Y/N) a dress to match."

"And here I thought you wouldn't be one for such sentiments," Saeyoung said with a chuckle. "But don't worry. I'll make sure you both have everything you need for the party."

But Saeran knew that when Saeyoung said those words, he didn't just mean them in reference to the party. No, Saeyoung had made it abundantly clear from the first day when he'd invited Saeran and (Y/N) into his home, going shopping with them the next day to buy them all they could possibly need to survive for the next five years, that his hospitality extended past whatever formalities they were used to.

Saeyoung would make sure that Saeran and (Y/N) were happy, truly happy.

And as Saeran sat, arm wrapped around the love of his life as she slept, engaged in casual conversation with the twin he'd spent so much of his life missing, he found that his happiness was rising with the sun behind him.

It was a slow process, but steady.

And certain as the sunrise, no matter how far Saeran fell, there were now two people in his life who would help him pick up the pieces and get himself together.

The boy smiled, watching lazily as his brother continued on whatever rant he was pursuing, observing as the sun lit up the room: the face of his brother, the outlines of all the previously dark objects in the room, the (h/c) strands of his lover that were beginning to grow back in at the roots.

It was a strange happiness. Certainly not a conventional one.

But the happiness was there, covering every moment as clearly as the light that shone through the window.

"Yeah," He answered his brother when the redhead posed a goofy question, an excited smile on his lips as he continued to gesture wildly. Saeran was barely paying attention to half the words coming out of his twin's mouth, but he didn't need to.

_This_ was happiness, and Saeran had to do was sit back, smile, and enjoy it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 1.7k
> 
> Notes: It feels really strange to say, but this next chapter will be the final chapter in the entire series! Preliminary goodbyes are always different than the final farewell, so I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who's been with me on this ride before it gets too bittersweet :) I appreciate all your support, and i feel like this publishing this series has taught me so much. It's my first series, actually, and its sort of strange but i can see how my writing has subtly developed and changed from chapter 1 of the neutral route to this here xD anyways - final chapter this thursday (you can bet your butt i wont miss it for the world) and I'll see you all then <3
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Next Update: 4/30/20
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


	29. XXIII: Saeran's Route (Y/N)

When it came to formalwear, you'd only ever seen Saeran in his black suit, back at the Mint Eye.

And he, your usual believers' robes and the magenta dresses that Rika had forced you to wear.

As such, it was a pleasant surprise for the two of you to see each other the morning of the RFA party—Saeran, in a white tuxedo selected by Saeyoung, and you, in a delicate (f/c) dress that hung at your knees.

"You look beautiful, princess." Saeran pressed a chaste kiss to your lips as soon as the two of you stepped out of the car. He'd been eyeing you since you slipped the dress on, but had evidently held back in all your haste to arrive at the party. Now that the three of you were here, though, he seemed to pay no mind to the venue, wrapping his arms around you tightly.

"Your suit," You mumbled into Saeran's lips, eyes closed and unable to hold back a smile. "You look perfect in it."

If he heard your compliment, though, Saeran made no indication of such, ignoring even his brother's pleas for the three of you to _come on and get inside already._

Finally, when you were breathless (and just a little needy) from the kiss, he released you.

"All right, let's go."

As you followed the twins into the party hall, you couldn't help but sigh at Saeran's inexplicable ability to kiss you as if he'd never kissed you before, and then act completely normal the next moment, as if nothing had happened.

_He really doesn't know what he does to me_ , you realized with an amused smile. _Though that only makes him more precious._

You entered the party hall, listening absentmindedly to Saeyoung's chatter as he talked to you about the previous parties that had been hosted. In truth, you didn't care much. All that mattered was the present, and the fact that this party hosted would directly help everyone who had been touched by the Mint Eye's distorted ways.

After this party, everything would go back to normal.

Everything.

All the believers and disciples would disband, find new paths to take in society. Rika herself was apparently under the care of V himself, and would also be given a chance to heal from the wounds she'd inflicted upon herself and others. And, perhaps most importantly, you and Saeran would finally be able to continue your relationship in peace. The Mint Eye would be a thing of the past, leaving only an unbound future for you to march into.

"Ah! Saeran, (Y/N), you made it!" You turned to see the calm smile of V. "I hope you'll both stay til the end of the party. I have a small surprise planned at the end that I'm sure you'll both enjoy."

"Saeyoung has decided that he won't leave until even the party cleanup has finished, so we'll definitely be here a while." You smiled warmly at the man who, somewhat inadvertently, had helped free you from your old life.

"That's good to hear. How have the two of you been faring in Saeyoung's bunker?"

The next few hours passed like that. Small chatter with the various guests, Saeran pulling you off to the side every now and then to whisper in your ear or to kiss you, Saeyoung pulling you two back into a new conversation.

When you escaped to the bathroom, you ran into MC, who seemed rather uncomfortable to be caught alone in your presence, especially now that she knew the full story about everything that had happened. She was by no means kind in her words, but her halfhearted "We should talk sometime" seemed like an unspoken offer to make amends. It wasn't anything tangible, but you suspected that, if things continued down that route, there might come a day when the two of you would be acquaintances. Maybe even friends.

You had the pleasure of meeting the people Saeyoung worked with at the RFA: from Yoosung, the blonde college student (who you learned was Rika's cousin) to Jumin, the executive corporate heir of some company that you recognized the name of from your orphanage days.

"V, isn't it time you began the final event?" A man named 'Zen' asked.

"Ah, you're right." V smiled and bowed his head lightly. "I hope you'll all excuse me."

Before he could go, though, Jumin spoke up.

"Truly, V? You're positive that you want to sell your pictures for this event?" The black-haired man seemed skeptical, and for good reason. You'd heard from Saeyoung that V's pictures were sought after in the industry, and selling them at _this_ specific event (noble as the cause was) might not have been the best decision for the man's career.

"As things stand, this event hasn't raised enough finances to help all those affected by the Mint Eye. If selling my pictures can play a role in sealing this chapter of Rika's past...I'm sure she'll be much better for it."

"You really still want to be with her after everything she did to Saeran and (Y/N)?" Saeyoung's question was fueled more by curiosity than anger, or any past resentment, but it made V stiffen nonetheless.

"I understand that everyone has mixed feelings...but Rika is just as broken as her followers, maybe even more. I...I just want to help her heal. And hopefully, this time, things will be different. She now has the support of her family, after all." V smiled lightly and glanced at Yoosung. Upon hearing the word 'family,' the blonde seemed to burst with energy, his smile doubling in intensity.

As V walked toward the stage, leaving you all, you couldn't help but hear Saeyoung murmur somewhat wistfully, "At least Rika brings Yoosung happiness."

And as much as the woman had wronged you, you couldn't help but agree. The blonde boy seemed to radiate joy—and after being separated from Saeran only to reunite, you would recognize the look in his eye anywhere: _bliss._ Bliss and relief, at reattaining that which was once lost.

Before you could dwell on the matter further, though, V's clear voice echoed through the room. Instantly, all chatter ceased, and the guests turned their attention upon him.

Well, most guests.

As V politely thanked everyone for attending the party and spoke about the important sponsors, you turned to Saeran.

"How are you feeling?" You kept your voice low so that only he could hear you, knowing how mixed his feelings still were on V and this whole situation.

"Not as bad as I thought things would be. Better, since you're by my side." Saeran smiled softly down at you, pressing a kiss to your temple. You couldn't help but lean into his touch when he laced his fingers in yours.

You wanted to say more, perhaps thank Saeran for even agreeing to come here in the first place with you, but before you could, the sound of cheering erupted all over you.

_Oh._

V had begun the auction.

You watched as, all around you, people began bidding for his work. Indeed, you understood why the demand for his pictures was so high. As V unveiled album after album, you began to realize why he was a world-renowned photographer.

"Ah, this collection is one he's been asked to sell countless times. I'm glad he's finally releasing it to the public," Saeyoung murmured from next to you, providing you tidbits of information with each new album.

You watched in awe as four albums were revealed and sold, the first album sold off separately in pieces, but the others bid upon as full sets—and couldn't help but let your breath catch in your throat as each new picture was revealed.

Art.

There was no other way to describe it.

V's camera didn't just capture moments and scenes: he captured emotions.

The first album, _Flowers in Laughter,_ left you shook with its brilliance—breaking down any questions you might have had in mind over V's capabilities.

The second, _Myriad Memoir,_ almost scared you with how much raw emotion it brought forth.

When you saw the third, you almost forgot to breathe: each picture in _Glass over Truth_ seeming to resonate with not just your heart but memories you thought long buried.

And even when your eyes settled over _Observing Lies_ , when you were so confident that nothing else could shake you, your bottom lip trembled as you continued glancing from picture to picture.

You felt your heart rise and fall as each album took you on an emotional rollercoaster, bringing you to lows and highs, showing you sorrow and joy, and the delicate smidgens of hope buried underneath it all.

Truly, you couldn't look at a single one of his pictures and bear to tear your eyes away.

Your heart wouldn't let you.

And that, perhaps, was why when V's final album, was revealed, your entire body felt like it was short-circuiting.

"This album is a product of my most recent work. As many rumors have been circulating, my eyesight is indeed beginning to fail. But it is known that, in my work, I aim to photograph more than what our eyes can see—I photograph what the heart feels, and immortalize it. Which is why, despite my decreasing capabilities of vision, even I am not so blind as to fail to recognize the pure _love_ that these individuals have in their hearts."

V pulled back the curtain that was revealing the final set of pictures, and Saeran's grip over your hand instantly tightened.

"This collection is my most prized work, a culmination of everything I sought to capture when I first decided to be a photographer. I call this album: _Where Futures Begin._ "

Without even formally opening the bidding, people were already shouting numbers—every soul in the room wanting to own _this_ masterpiece collection.

Because no matter how brilliant all V's previous works were, this album put them all to shame. There was no mistaking it: the angles and light and object organization left nothing to the imagination: looking at these pictures, even the biggest fools would have to see what V had managed to capture so beautifully.

You stared in awe.

Each image in the album was filled with the purest emotion: love.

Each image in the album was of _you._

You and Saeran, to be specific.

You gazed at the first picture. The two of you were locked in a tight embrace just outside the Mint Eye, seeking not comfort in each others' arms but _stability_ , as if in that time of turmoil the only reliable, unchanging foundation in your lives was each other.

The second image—you didn't even know that V had been present, but looking back it made sense that he would have seen it—was one of where the two of you were in the rain under a single umbrella. At the time, you hadn't even registered that both your outfits were varying shades of grey, but the black-and-white nature of your clothes and the background only made the splashes of color on both your cheeks all the more prominent as you clung to Saeran's sleeve while he gazed down at you adoringly, a rare smile eternalized on his face.

The third, a chaste kiss outside V's apartment when Saeyoung had brought the two of you there to speak with the man. You stared at it in awe, wondering how the image managed to capture the fleetingness of the kiss despite the lasting nature of the picture.

The photographs continued like that, all moments that you had never been aware that V had seen, but captured and developed nonetheless. He had found everything: chaste kisses, abashed glances, sweet laughs, even the wholesome hand-holding that Saeran used to be so averse to. 

By some ridiculous miracle, the man had succeeded in photographing the two of you as Saeran kissed you so passionately just outside the party hall this morning, the fast-paced motion all around you only intensifying the intimacy of the moment when you two stood still to lose yourselves in each other. You couldn't help but wonder _when_ V had found the time to develop a picture so last-minute, given that the moment had happened just hours ago, but found yourself shaking your head. The man, as proven by this album, seemed to work wonders.

There was even a picture with Saeyoung, a snapshot of the three of you laughing, and the dispersal of red hair throughout the image told as much a story as it did reveal the varying types of love in your relationship: brotherly, platonic, and—of course—romantic.

You felt a familiar heat rise to your cheeks as the unmistakable feeling bloomed in your chest. No doubt, every person in the room who was gazing upon those pictures was feeling it too.

_Love._

And at the back of your mind, you remembered how V had quietly urged you and Saeran to stay—saying that he had a lovely surprise for you two at the end.

_Why, this is the best surprise a person could receive._

You found yourself unable to take the smile off your face, the grin only emboldened by Saeyoung's voice joining on the current bidding war that was going on over this album.

"I want it!" He shouted, overly dramatic as usual. You had to force his hand down to get him to listen, but by then, Saeran was egging him on.

The glint of pride in both their eyes as they gazed upon your and Saeran's love immortalized almost prompted you to let the brothers do as they pleased, but you finally found your voice.

" _No_ , guys." You forced them both to look you in the eye amidst all the chaotic bidding. "V called this album _Where Futures Begin_ for a reason."

It was only then that they seemed to recall the album name, and it was then that they understood the meaning of your words.

Where futures begin. But not the future itself.

The album would go home to the house of a wealthy individual, likely one who didn't have the same love in their life as the three of you had in yours'. But that fact wouldn't matter to you. It shouldn't.

Because you had your whole lives ahead of you. Lives that were finally free of the past, no longer rooted in pain or misunderstandings or misery.

This album was V's gift to the three of you. It was a _Congratulations!_ present in advance, commemorating the balance of love that the three of you would be sharing from that day and every day onward. Through thick and thin, that would become the new constant in your lives: the emotion that V had selected when he first saw the way you and Saeran gazed into each others' eyes. _Love._

And while others would get to enjoy the sight of where your future together began, you all would have something so much better: the actual future.

At long last, you had finally reached a state where no one else would be able to steal that future away.

No, that future belonged to you, Saeran, and Saeyoung. No others.

A flame ignited in your heart at the thought, fanned by sudden thoughts of having to go through life without either of the boys that you'd grown so dependent on.

Though as you gazed upon their understanding faces and knowing smiles, you realized that there was no need to fear.

These two boys _were_ your future.

Nothing would ever be able to take that away from you.

_Fin._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 2.7k
> 
> Notes: Wow. It feels so bittersweet, that this (my first series ever) is coming to a close after a total of 29 chapters, but it fills me with happiness that i actually succeeded in getting this done. I'm thankful to you guys for reading this, because I never would have been able to complete this otherwise. Thank you for sticking with me, thank you for commenting, thank you for leaving kudos, thank you for reading. It's been such a ride (four whole months!) and while this journey is over, i hope that you'll join me in the next fic :) I hope you enjoyed this series, and I hope that you have an absolutely wonderful day. <3
> 
> Comment & Leave Kudos
> 
> Thank you for reading <3
> 
> I do not own the rights to Mystic Messenger or any of the characters within it.


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